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The S91 Goalie Class - Fisting Imminent


Spartan

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For Theme Week, most people have discussed snubbings that have already occurred in the past - generally a player not winning an award, or someone not being recognized for something in particular. I've decided to look into the future and identify players who may be FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY in the imminent future.

 

The S90 and S91 classes have been widely regarded as some of the better draft classes in recent memory. The S90 class featured talented skaters going well into the second round, although there were just a couple goalie prospects with only one considered highly enough to be a first round selection. The S91 class also appears on track to feature some phenomenal skaters at the top of the first round, but the real feature of this class is the depth of goalie prospects available. The S90 class contained 4 goalies total - the S91 class has 11 goalies with 7 of them considered active. 4 goalies in the S91 class have already surpassed TPE levels of 2 of the S90 goalies. With such a deep goalie class and limited starter slots in the VHL, there will be folks who get FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY. It's only a question of who it'll be.

 

Let's take a look at each of the goalie prospects in the class so far:

 

1. Red Panda - @Lemorse7 - 217 TPE

41 GP - 32 W - 8 L - 1 OTL, 0.904 SV%, 2.16 GAA, 1 SO, 89 GA on 927 shots

 

The first goalie to declare for the S91 class, it's no surprise that Red Panda leads the goalie class in perceived development. He also remains tied in the VHLM for wins, although his Save % only lands 8th amongst starters. His GAA ranks 3rd amongst starters, which is a small saving grace. Panda is least likely to be FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY and should be the first goalie off the board, especially since teams like Warsaw, Moscow, and maybe New York in the lottery range will be looking for a goalie. 

 

2. Olober Syko - ME - 207 TPE

39 GP - 32 W - 6 L - 1 OTL, 0.915 SV%, 1.78 GAA, 5 SO, 70 GA on 821 shots

 

A slightly later entry to the S91 class, the metalhead turned netminder trails slightly behind Red Panda in TPE but is already far exceeding his performance on the ice. Syko currently remains in first place in the M for wins (tied), losses, save percentage, goals against, shutouts (tied) and goals against. While the argument can certainly be made that a tremendous San Diego team has sheltered Syko, it's also one of the best scenarios to nurture a prospect goaltender in. Syko may be a little FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY if he ends up being the second or third goaltender off the board, with the highest potential to be FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY coming from the prospect up next in the number 3 spot.

 

3. Dalkr Vidarsson - @KaleebtheMighty - 193 TPE

38 GP - 23 W - 10 L - 5 OTL, 0.906 SV%, 2.34 GAA, 3 SO, 90 GA on 962 shots

 

A goalie who declared for the S91 class around the same time as Syko, right before the S90 VHLM Dispersal Draft, Vidarsson could be one of the most significant wild cards in this draft class. Although he ranks 3rd in TPE and in the middle of the VHLM goalie pack statistically, the prospect could go anywhere between the lottery range and the end of the first round. While Warsaw, Moscow and New York were highlighted earlier as likely lottery teams that will need franchise netminders, other teams like Seattle, DC, Vancouver and LA will all have an eye on a netminder this class to replace their aging starters. Vidarsson has a high potential to be FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY, especially if teams prioritize Panda and Syko in the early-mid first, leaving the Greenland native to drop into the late first or early second round.

 

4. David Slezak - @ShawnGlade - 183 TPE

39 GP - 23 W - 13 L - 2 OTL, 0.910 SV%, 2.32 GAA, 5 SO, 88 GA on 979 shots

 

Slezak has quickly gone from a highly ranked, early draft eligible prospect to a dark horse in the S91 goalie race. From his performance, he's arguably the second best goalie in the VHLM but has quietly dropped into 4th place in the goalie class due to slightly slower perceived development from scouts and team personnel. While he very well could end up finishing the season as the best goalie in the VHLM, Slezak is the case study on why teams might not select the best players in the minor leagues over other players with higher potential and upside. Slezak likely has the highest chance of being FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY this next class, dropping down into the 2nd round where a team like DC or VAN who lack first round picks will keep an eye on a goalie for the future.

 

5. Pipo Popa - @npuBeT - 140 TPE

40 GP - 7 W - 29 L - 4 OTL, 0.907 SV%, 3.94 GAA, 1 SO, 159 GA on 1706 shots (jesus)

 

Poor Popa not only had the misfortune to be one of the latest goalies to declare for the S91 VHL draft, but also ended up in potentially the worst VHLM situation of the five goalies listed here with the struggling Houston Bulls. With literally 3 players in front of him, it's no surprise that Popa's stats are absolutely horrendous, but there's been simply no opportunity to truly evaluate the youngster's skill. Due to his late start and unfortunate VHLM situation, I predict that Pipo Popa will be the biggest goalie SNUB of the S91 VHL draft and go in the mid-late 2nd round. #JusticeforPopa

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I like what you mentioned about Syko and Slezak specifically. I think Olober Syko and David Slezak are the two best goalies SKILL WISE in the draft, but like you mentioned, Slezak is more or less coasting on welfare right now (I honestly don't have an excuse, I've just been lazy) but I think one of those two is winning GOTY this season

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