Claimed:Clardy FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY for Mercenaries roster spot [Final 6/6]

[Guest]

Clardy crushes Moscow forward Steven Bradbury

 

HOUSTON, TX - Michael Clardy wasn't exactly the biggest name on the international free agent market. Clardy had just come off a VHLM season where he saw less than perfect numbers, a "lacking motivation" per coaches at times, and having to deal with issues at home like natural crises. This caused Clardy's name to fall off the radar for the beginning of the S43 World Cup and Clardy was overlooked for Team USA's roster. The defender was looking forward to some offseason hockey but was denied from his home country for not being developed enough, as Clardy was a budding prospect in the American hockey system.

 

Clardy signs autographs at the University of Houston during the offseason

 

As a result of being denied the opportunity to play for his home country, Clardy looked elsewhere to try and get some more hockey in his life. Team Mercenaries looked like they would need a defensive player like Clardy that could distribute the puck to a good group of forwards, but the gun-for-hire team decided to instead go with one of the Hyvarinen brothers in Marquis. Marquis and Michael were seen in practice for the Mercenary tryout and scouts close to the media noted that Hyvarinen looked under-developed in comparison to Clardy. Clardy's ability to read an offensive break and find the open man was superb, while Marquis struggled to keep up. Either way, Clardy was left off the team and returned to Houston for the offseason. Having taken a few nonstop flights to the 4th largest city in the US over the season, Clardy felt almost at home boarding the plane to take him to his true home. Saying hello to the regular flight attendants, signing pictures for the pilots, and engaging in conversation with traveling businessmen that take the trip often, Clardy has become a fixture recently with Southwest Airlines and their new European routes.

 

Clardy takes a break and visits Memorial Hermann Park in Houston for a round of 18

 

Clardy has plenty to do in Houston besides hockey. The beautiful Memorial Hermann Park hosts a PGA level golf course and local media have seen the defender practicing his swing against the UH golf team. College teammates helped Clardy out with his club selection and played caddy for everyone, which led to a fantastic group score. Clardy himself finished 2 under par and plans to work out the swing more as he has this break from hockey. While a reluctant hiatus, Clardy will be rooting for the Mercenaries and his boys in red, white, and blue, but if they join up, Clardy said, "I gotta go with my home over the money. USA over Mercenaries."

[Guest]

WTF? I swear I wrote FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY...

 

EDIT: Ah, I get it now...

 

snubbed

Edited June 24, 2015 by Guest

[CoachReilly 688]

love that this still happens

[diamond_ace 3,112]

Clardy and the better Hyvarinen (no offense munk) will just have to make our own Mercenaries Part 2: The Redux team

[STZ 5,360]

This could be good enough to be the Mag cover story

[Guest]

This could be good enough to be the Mag cover story

I want the title the same, no backsies

[Guest]

This could be good enough to be the Mag cover story

I want the title the same, no backsies

[.sniffuM 1,741]

rugghfugxrkjvxtjvdubcujnfubfdikbvrivdrhoohvherpes

Edited June 24, 2015 by .sniffuM

[boubabi 4,725]

What was the actual word in the title

[Munk 1,298]

Clardy and the better Hyvarinen (no offense munk) will just have to make our own Mercenaries Part 2: The Redux team

Hey I tried getting kicked off. Not my fault I'm so lovely

Ps im the circus monkey

Edited June 24, 2015 by Munk

[diamond_ace 3,112]

Hey I tried getting kicked off. Not my fault I'm so lovely

Ps im the circus monkey

Yeah I know, but tbh I don't really mind missing a season of WC. It's not like I'll do anything yet. I'm one of the future key players for Scandy, so I'll be good in the next WC

[Guest]

What was the actual word in the title

s n u b b e d

[Ball 453]

s n u b b e d

Mad people getting FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY lately. As a repeat victim im here for you if you need a shoulder to cry on.

[Guest]

I like how 2 graders commented and this goes ungraded lol

[Phil 5,119]

hahah as soon as I saw the title I laughed so hard - love that this still is a thing. 

[DollarAndADream 3,356]

I like how 2 graders commented and this goes ungraded lol

The 2 graders that commented are graphics graders, not media guys.

 

I have no excuse though.

 

[DollarAndADream 3,356]

Content: 3/3 - Great article. Yeah, it sucks to get FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY but you should be on a roster next time. I would have picked you.

Grammar: 2/2 - Nothing to see, here!

Appearance: 1/1 - Good!

Overall: 6/6

[Kendrick 4,741]

Claimed