Higgins 3,618 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 Tukio 2 Good 2 Practice Tuomas Tukio, the goaltender for the New York Americans and reigning MVP of the VHL is just too good to practice. "Can I get some extra depreciation over here?!" Tukio screamed at defenseman Jake Wild of the Helsinki Titans after he shut them out in back to back games. Tukio is the first player to ever have more TPE than attributes to put them. Tukio is now banking TPE even though he is forced to retire after this season. He currently has 9 TPE banked after getting 99 in every available goaltending attribute. Total Points Earned: 1379; (9 Banked) SK = Skating: 99 SZ = Size: 99 AG = Agility: 99 RB = Rebound Control: 99 SC = Style Control: 99 HS = Hand Speed: 99 RT = Reaction Time: 99 EX = Experience: 86 LD = Leadership: 99 What does one do when they don't need to practice anymore? Well it leaves the Finnish netminder lots of time to check tinder and eHarmony to see if any mucklers have labeled him as 'hot'. "I go on 2 or 3 dates every day now that I don't need to go to Americans practice" said Tukio. "Name a race, age group or gender, I've been with them all this week" he added. Some teammates are fine with Tukio's habits like Connor Low who said "I hate that guy, thank god he's not here, seriously he always pronounces my name with an o, it just sounds stupid!". Other teammates aren't so happy with Tukio missing mandatory practices. Logan Laich had this to say, "Damn it, Tukio's not here again? I'm going to be the slowest to skate the circles again". XXX is pretty rattled as well. "He went on a date with my sister the other day and then told me he scratched Asian off his bucket list". You want proof that Tukio is the biggest player in the league on AND off the ice? THAT'S WHATS UP. #2GUD2PRACTICE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fire Berhalter 3,107 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 Next challenge for you: 70 and older, Pacific Islander, Trans Male. Higgins 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler 881 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 Trash goalie Higgins 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Head Moderator Baozi 1,638 Posted May 26, 2014 Head Moderator Share Posted May 26, 2014 (edited) My sisters name is Joyce hahah #noob Edited May 26, 2014 by tfong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin Victor 10,681 Posted May 26, 2014 Admin Share Posted May 26, 2014 Target: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conchita_Wurst Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smarch 3,013 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 You do suck tho Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STZ 5,319 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 good time to retire, tbh imho.. gregreg 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gregreg 930 Posted May 26, 2014 Share Posted May 26, 2014 good time to retire, tbh imho.. yeah that JOIN THE MADNESS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Admin Will 4,648 Posted May 27, 2014 Senior Admin Share Posted May 27, 2014 If only Tukio could put TPE into his pickup lines............... TheLastOlympian07 and STZ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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