Nykonax

Closed.

@McWolf is this true

sabotage!

@Esso2264 get this man a contract

Hey @KitRas Welcome back to the VHL! I'm the AGM of the Ottawa Lynx and would like to offer you a contract with Ottawa. We can give 3rd line minutes to start, and you can easily move up if you stay active. We got an active LR full of your friends (Flan, Tez, Jepox, and kyl) and have developed many good players in Ottawa. Let me know what you think, and just quote this post and say accepted if you want to join

Hey @JW88HOCKEY! Welcome to the VHL! I'm the AGM of the Ottawa Lynx and would like to offer you a spot on our team. We can give you 3rd line minutes, and you can easily get more if you stay active. All contracts offered are 1.5M. Other teams will also offer you contracts, so decide based on the personality, minutes, and whatever else you want in a team. Personally at Ottawa we provide an active locker room, full of experts who can help you make the best player that you want. To prove it to you, over 50% of the first round picks in the last draft were from Ottawa, and my current player won the VHLM MVP, and is currently top 5 in points in the VHL. If you want to join Ottawa, just quote this post and say accepted! Thanks, Nyko

can't do the "moscow has never won a game" joke anymore

1. Decent 2. Thank god he won't retire here 3. Well that one line with Dahlberg and... actually I don't know the other irrelevant players on it.... but pretty good 4. Fleece level 10000 5. As bad as Peace... I'll let you decide that one

?

oof close one, good sign though!

4 players with 3 points, and pouta stops 36 shots. Good job team!

cause of me. Master playmaker Dahlberg

1. HC Davos Dynamo , DAV C 1 (DAV C3 1, DAV LW2 1) at 12:00 lethal line also 3 points from the god Dahlberg and an assist from @Poptart

nope. whenever you type s nubbed it changes to that lmao. @.sniffuM's legacy or something

thats hot

still better than anything i can do ....

@Award97 not that good at graphics lmao, not gonna claim this either... just gonna use it for a welfare claim in other leagues.

I told that person to lmao. He just said it in discord and that came to mind lol

@Josh.@Enorama A cool chill filled the air as the VHLers finished up their practice for the night. “Nice moves out there,” smiles Ryan Kastelic to his friend Jake Davis. “You really dangled me.” Davis turns his head with a sly smile but no words. Their eyes lock. Kastelic nods quietly in return. “All right boys, get off the ice now,” calls Coach Shawn from the bench, before he walks down the hall. “There seems to be a puck left behind here,” says Kastelic as he glides over to the wall. “I better pick that up.” Kastelic looks behind him as he slowly bends over. Davis, standing about 15 feet away, holds eye contact with Kastelic as the slender, tenacious defenceman reaches down and picks up the puck. “Nice grab,” says Davis. Kastelic stands back up straight and skates over to Davis with the puck in his hand, when suddenly it falls to the ice again. “Oopsie,” says Jake. “Guess I need to pick that up again.” “No,” says Davis. “My turn.” The powerful forward then slowly leans down, achieving a perfect 90-degree angle at his waist. “Is this how you do it?” “Mhmm,” says Kastelic, biting his lower lip. Davis fakes not being able to quite grab the puck, his hand fluttering over it each time and his body giving little wobbles that accentuate his pose. “Rrrr just pick it up,” growls Kastelic with wide eyes. Davis smiles at his friend’s eagerness. He knows how to tease. “This equipment is just so restrictive,” he groans. “Maybe you can help me out?” Kastelic’s mouth parts and a small drop of drool falls from his bottom lip. He wipes his mouth and moves closer to help his friend get more comfortable. “Your shoulders sure are tight,” says Ryan as he grips Davis’s arms underneath his jersey. “That feels good,” moans Ryan with his eyes shut. “Reach into my pants.” “Heh,” chuckles Kastelic. “You ain’t one to waste time.” His hands slide down to Davis’s jock area. “You got a footlong for me buddy?” Davis smiles. “Pull it out,” he whispers in Davis’s ear. Gripping Davis’s long cylinder with both hands, Kastelic slowly pulls a fresh 12” Chicken and Bacon Ranch on Italian Herb and Cheese from his pants. “Hell yeah,” says Jake, looking at the sub and back into Kastelic’s eyes, licking his lips. “Got the cookies too?” “Go back in,” says Davis. Kastelic reaches back into Jake’s pants and pulls out a little baggie of two soft Subway chocolate chip cookies. “Melt in your mouth,” he remarks before taking a sneaky bite. “Eat fresh,” winks Davis. And the two went back to the dressing room and had a great, nutritious and tasty meal. The end. NOT WRITTEN BY ME. WRITTEN BY SOME GUY ON R/CANUCKS. JUST REPLACED NAMES

Davos doesn't have Malenko anymore, so our average will be higher (or lower... idk... younger we'll say)

Tez hit 50 +1 https://vhlportal.com/players/playerfocus/1593

yeah, thats what i said when i found out about these obsessions of yours sorry for exposing you

@ShawnGlade has some weird obsessions, and I'm gonna tell you them 1. Anime body pillows covered in ketchup and relish Yes, you read that right. ShawnGlade likes to take anime body pillows and smear them in relish and ketchup. I don't know what he finds appealing about that, but he spends atleast $500 a month on supplies for this acivity 2. Elias Dahlberg Yep, Shawn Glade is obviously obssesed with Davos' star player, and best player in the league Elias Dahlberg. Rumor has it that he has a whole shrine full of pictures of Dahlberg. 3. Delaware Shawn Glade is obsessed with Delaware. Why? I don't know. Like, who even knows where Delaware is? I'm not even convinced its real. Like... do you know anyone from Delaware? No. It's fake like Finland. 4. Raccoons Shawn Glade is so obsessed with raccoons he even has one as his profile picture. He spends up to 3 hours a day just studying raccoons, and probably knows more about raccoons than a raccoon expert. Legend has it that he even has a pet raccoon 5. Roleplaying as a couch Yeah... I don't even know how you do this one. Some say they've seen him in action during practice at the Davos rink. He'll go down on all fours and just be there, for often hours on end. Dahlberg has told many rookies about this, and some are still confused. Dahlberg sometimes even has the nerve to sit on his GM.