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Is Chris Miller Rigging Hockey Matches To Fuel Cocaine Habit?


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After yesterday’s revelations that Tom Slaughter has in fact all of the slaughtering abilities of a postcard, further INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISM has found out that Slaughter has in fact accrued less penalties over the course of his career than his team-mate, keeper Brick Wahl, which is fucking ridiculous. The only feasible reasoning that I can have for this is that Chris Miller, the New York Americans General Manager and Agent for Wahl has instructed Tom Slaughter to actively hold back from getting PIMs, and then is placing bets on Wahl getting more PIMs in a season than Slaughter, and it’s downright disgusting to see that.

 

But where is this tainted money being used? Is it being fed under the table to Connor Low or Odin Tordahl in order to pay for the services of women? OR, is Chris Miller using it to fuel a drug habit, since that’s really the only kind of thing you can do with tainted money? This investigative journalist will be sure to look into this case further, but for now will post a completely unfounded piece detailing that Miller probably has in order to use it as click-bait in order to generate more revenue from ad money to fund his own cocaine habit.

Edited by XaviYEAH! Woods

But where is this tainted money being used? Is it being fed under the table to Connor Low or Odin Tordahl in order to pay for the services of women?

Yeah, right, 'women'.

You have to buy condoms for both, and that's expensive.

 

And to think you thought it would be a cost-cutting measure.

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