diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 23, 2017 Share Posted November 23, 2017 Motherfucker Sharpe is up first. He starts at the center line, and very carefully passes the puck off the side boards at a precise angle. There are 9 punching bags in between him and the goal, one with each logo of the teams he doesn’t play for. After sending the puck on its way, he pulls back and winds up for a punch… the punch flies right through the Quebec punching bag! Then the Seattle one, and the Toronto one as well! He switches hands, and the next punch flies through the New York, Riga, and Helsinki punching bags, then he returns to the first hand and throws the final punch through the Stockholm, Davos, and Cologne punching bags, just in time to meet back up with the puck in front of the net. He swings the stick like a golf club and chips the puck into the top corner, past Degrath and in. Komarov lines up next. He takes 5 guys in very well padded sumo suits and sets them up on alternating sides in a zig zag pattern, starting at the left faceoff dot. He skates around the first one, then checks him into the boards, all while maintaining control of the puck. He then skates over to the second one and does the same, then he repeats this with each of the remaining sumo suited players. All five are flat on the ice, lined up against their respective boards, and Komarov never lost the puck. He stops, fires, and shoots the puck at full speed past the five hole of Moon, into the net, and tearing a hole in it – the shot itself is reminiscent of the famous “knuckle puck” made popular in the Mighty Ducks movies. Cornerstone sets up 6 stones on the ice. The first two are at the corners where the blue line meets the boards, one on each side. The third and fourth stones are at the bottom of each of the two faceoff circles, and the fifth and sixth are tied to the top corners of the net. He skates down the middle and passes it off the stone on the left side of the blue line, does a spin and receives the puck back, to then pass it off the stone on the right side of the blue line. Skating forward a little more, he does the same pass-spin-pass off the stones on the bottom of the faceoff circles. He takes a shot at the left upper corner, knocking the stone out and the puck deflects back to his stick, so he then takes another shot at the right upper corner, knocking that stone out as well and the puck deflects down into the net, sending Arkander every which way. Verner Reinholdt steps up to the circle. No props this time, but it looks like he’s carrying two sticks, this ought to be interesting. He takes one of the sticks and chips the puck up into the air off the metal post where the glass meets the penalty box. While the puck is in the air, he picks up the other stick, holding one in each hand. He catches the puck on the right stick, then bounces it from one to the other and back to the first, over his head in the shape of a V. He keeps the V formation of the two sticks and the puck in motion between them all the way down the ice, where he tilts one stick at an angle right in front of the net. It’s enough to deflect the puck perfectly past Brookside on the glove side. Keaton Louth takes his turn in the center circle. It’s just him, one stick, and the puck, but then he waves up into the crowd… no, it looks like he’s waving at someone in the control booth, because banners have started to descend from the roof of the stadium. It appears to be handmade banners depicting images of some of the best first-gen players throughout league history – Mitch Higgins, Daniel Braxton, Travis Boychuk, and the like. They’re all in one straight line down the middle of the ice, and it appears as though there are eight such banners in total. Louth flips the puck up onto his stick, lifts it and pulls it back, then flings it into the air over the banners, symbolizing his own flight into the first-gen annals himself. The puck drops with precision, bouncing off the rod holding the last banner – a Lars Intranquilo banner, an odd choice because despite his skill, Intranquilo was never a big stats guy – and the deflection rolls the puck into the bottom left corner behind an unsuspecting Degrath. Louth points toward the door on the other end of the ice, and it looks like he must have known something. We’d heard there was going to be a guest appearance for this event, and here he is, noted former VHLer Lars Intranquilo! He waves a stick in the air, basking in the roar of the crowd just like the good old days, but age has certainly taken a toll on him. Louth skates off and the banners lift, leaving just Intranquilo at center ice and Moon in the net. Nothing fancy here for Intranquilo, but he was always a fan of self-deprecating humor, so he’s lined up a walker. He skates up to the walker, chipping the puck up and setting it on the cross post. He grips the walker and makes exaggerated “old people” movements toward the goal. It looks like there are mini skate blades under the walker to help it glide across the ice. When he gets in front of the net, he knocks the puck back off the walker, throws it aside, and sets it up. Fancy stick work from the retiree, he always knew his way around the puck. Unfortunately, he was never so great at shooting… he winds up and flings it with all his might, but it deflects weakly off Moon’s blocker. JardyB10 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 23, 2017 Author Share Posted November 23, 2017 Intranquilo is not eligible for votes - he and Brookside are filler. The only one of my players who can win anything is Hrdina, he's on a level playing field with others in the competitions he's in, the others are there to balance the numbers.@JardyB10 @Gooningitup @Devise @STZ @KGR @Beaviss @boubabi your players are here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 23, 2017 Author Share Posted November 23, 2017 It's already 1003 words, and that's just from one skill (admittedly, the most word intensive skill). 2000 should be cake when the rest of the article goes up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 23, 2017 Author Share Posted November 23, 2017 ALSO: Note for the updaters - this is NOT a 590 article. I have one for the week, Faceoff Kings. This post is not to be used for TPE, as it will be part of a larger post in the MS section in a few days Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banackock 8,043 Posted November 23, 2017 Share Posted November 23, 2017 my boy louth diamond_ace 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOOM 8,744 Posted November 23, 2017 Share Posted November 23, 2017 Voted. diamond_ace 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beaviss 4,957 Posted November 23, 2017 Share Posted November 23, 2017 Louth hype diamond_ace 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JardyB10 4,865 Posted November 24, 2017 Share Posted November 24, 2017 Lars is my homie! diamond_ace 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 25, 2017 Author Share Posted November 25, 2017 Vote ends. 1st is Louth, 2nd is Komarov, 5th is Sharpe. New vote will be held to break the tie between Cornerstone and Verner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond_ace 3,112 Posted November 25, 2017 Author Share Posted November 25, 2017 Also, this will have to change slightly based on teams: - Komarov's shot will be against Degrath, Louth's shot will be against Moon. - Verner will go third, Cornerstone will go fourth. The actual shots remain the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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