Tsbagsuph

I have been advised by my council that the correct choice is Ottawa. Everyone else is a bastard and I now hate them. For further comments on my decision, please speak to my sponsor, Buzz Cola, the buzziest cola of all!

Hmm... I don't know who Robbie is so I don't really care about that from Oslo. A response will be coming tomorrow (or this weekend sometime)

full disclosure, I am not the most familiar with your processes... but... How likely is it that the draft can be reheld on the sole-account that I will be included. I think all of the GMs (8 of them? or is it 6?) would probably be okay with it. They all seem cool... except that one guy

Smarch, I've waited 12 minutes now. That is 24x longer than I've ever lasted in bed. Because you are so slow, I'm going to have to join Cologne (which includes a Ralph Lauren cologne sponsorship deal)

Player InformationUsername: TsbagsuphFull Name: Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-CoxPosition: DAge: 69Handedness: LRecruited By/From: Would you like an experienced member to mentor you? YesPlayer AttributesTotal Points Earned: 30CK = Checking: 40FG = Fighting: 40DI = Discipline: 40SK = Skating: 40ST = Strength: 40PH = Puck Handling: 40FO = Face Offs: 40PA = Passing: 40SC = Scoring: 40DF = Defense: 40PS = Penalty Shot: 40EX = Experience: 40LD = Leadership: 40OtherJersey Number: 69Height (inches): 6'9"Weight (lbs.): 169Birthplace: Same place as his brother, I can't remember.Awards Participation medal in 400 meter sprint (1994) Biggest cock in Altanishburg, Norway (2014) Second smallest cock in Norway (2014) Other Career StatsPlayer MovementPast Players

Who wants it moar?

Darn

Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks Forward +/- Rating and Points

I'm gonna join Yukon!

So, my options are Bratislava or Oslo. Now's your chance. I'm 140 characters or less (including the hashtag), why should I play on your team?

Put two zeros at the end of that and we got a deal.

How much money do I get?

Where has he been? That is the question that everyone around the VHL has been asking... for a short period of perhaps a week about 4 seasons ago. BUT... Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks has a good reason for leaving the VHL. After being drafted by Calgary, they acted in breach of their pre-draft negotiations. Sure, Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks could have just sucked it up and played anyway, but he wasn't supposed to be the one sucking. So what went wrong? This: EaglesFan: What do you expect from me as your GM? Tsbagsuph-Diks: Handies on the regular. EaglesFan: You sound perfect. Sure, "You sound perfect" is not legally binding, but there was a clear understanding of each parties responsibilities. Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks would show up to practices and in return, EaglesFan was jerk off Kendrick on a regular basis. While the frequency was not determined, it has come to our attention that Kendrick expected at least 3 handies a week from Eaglesfan. So what has Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks been up to over these past few seasons? That's a good question. In fact, it's an excellent question that any VHL fan deserves an answer to as Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks was once touted as being a high potential mediocre player. In fact, he was drafted in the first or second round of the season forty-something draft. That is a pretty high spot for someone who has never played in the VHL before. As such, your curiosity is entirely justified as to Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks whereabouts. Well let me begin by telling you that he was not playing in the VHL. But I suppose you knew that if you are the VHL fan that we were referring to in the prior sentences. Should I need to clarify that to the non-VHL fans. Of course not. They wouldn't be reading this article, so lets jump to the answer of the question of Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks and where he has been since we have established that you are a real VHL fan. So, Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks was supposed to be at practices, but instead he was... you know what, before elaborating on his location, I should clarify that the team that there were expectations for Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks to show up to practices during the first season. Some people might assume that rookies get a little bit of leniency regarding practice because they need to acclimate to the professional and semi-professional league of the VHL and VHLM. Nosiree. Rookies don't get this privilege. So instead of attending practices every single day, Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks was doing something else In fact, he wasn't even in the arena. Nope, he was elsewhere. Where? Well, let me tell you. Oops, out of words for this Media Spot. Tune in next time for more on this gripping story.

Also, what has my player been up to over the last few months?

Guess whos back for a limited time only. Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks has shown up to the lockerroom for the first time in over half a year (probably… I don’t actually know how long I’ve been gone). There are a few things I really want to say. To give the appearance of an objective article, I will refer to my player in the third-person. Kendrick E. Tsbagsuph-Diks is really sorry for abandoning his team. In fact, Kendrick regularly thinks about the long steaming showers he had with all his athletic teammates while he is lying in bed. Kendrick will sometimes go to his local gym and do nothing but stand in the shower to be surrounded by naked, buff, and sweaty men all day, but he digresses that it is not the same to lathering up his teammates with soap and conditioners. He longs for those days again, and that is what has inspired Kendrick to return to the VHL.