BluObieZ

Okay I feel like I should probably put a warning on this one. If you are fertile woman please make sure you are on the pill. This MS is about scoring. Not just everyday scoring but scoring that makes goalies shake and think twice about if they are any good. So if you have not taken that pill yet today, do it now. Orion Slade is very close to entering the league, so close that I don’t know if I want to continue earning much more TPE for Kane. I will probably cap him at 800, he is just above 700 right now. I honestly don’t know if I can really hold my excitement for my last player ever for much longer. Why? Because I know how much SWC3 ran shit. Why did he run shit? Well he won three fucking cups that’s for one. Another reason is because he was just dominant on the ice. He made teams fear him while on the ice and he made GM’s beg him to sign with them in the off-season. But one thing they did not know is that most of them had no chance of signing him. With Orion most GM’s actually have a legit shot at signing him but only at one season at a time. He will change teams like it is going out of style. Much like he will be putting up goals like it was going out of style. Now how do we know that he will be this offensive force? How do we know he will fill that net like porn star gets filled in a gangbang? Well look at the long track record of the Robbie Agency. He has a very precise way looking for forward talent. He only wants only the greediest players on the ice. Players that hunt down that puck and don’t want to give it up. Sure SWC3 knew how to pass the puck well but he could finish with the best of them. SWC3 was a hybrid player, none that the agency has ever seen. Orion has done some mind blowing shit with the puck that make people think of SWC3 but even on another level if you can’t even imagine. Forwards that sign with the Robbie Agency must think about themselves first and foremost. If they do not then Robbie may even drop them. Players must think about their personal achievements over their team mates. When they are skating down the ice and they see a hole where they can score an easy goal but they can make a great pass so someone else can get that easy goal they are told they must go for the goal themselves and gloat about it in the face of the other team. But how does Robbie the king of the ego ensure his players adapt his mindset? Well he make sure his players focus on their game with the puck. He knows that when the puck is with the other team that the puck will end up on his players stick. He calls it “Gravitational Awareness” which he explains as “The puck always goes to the best player on the ice, it’s not my fault that my guys tend to be that guy. The puck just follow them around” Another thin his players do is instead of shooting at some shitty front loading dryer, they shoot at the face of the goalies of other teams. Their objective is not only to hit the targets but totally destroy them. No the targets are not made of foam. They are made of steel. These boys know how to shoot and they know how to shoot hard. So hard that it may even brake your goalies wrist. Do your fucking wrist exercises goalies and no jerking off does not count. Robbie talking about Orion said “If when it’s all said and done has not scored 500 fucking goals in his career in the VHL I will be disappointed, I know he will be. 500 goals and at least 4 cups is our goal, anything beyond that is a cherry on top of his career and exclamation point on the end of mine.” For Orion when created

Lol at boy getting USA GM when I got gold the last 2 times around

I am the only logical choice for USA let me go for a 3 peat

I'll take that bet

I am not sure if you have noticed but I have not been around a ton in the last few weeks. To say that it’s only because I lost any and all interest in the site is a lie. It’s more like because my job is literally fucking killing me. Well not killing me, but by the end of the week I feel like a zombie. Not only did I work close 100hr’s Monday to Friday I directed a commercial on Saturday. To put a cherry on top of my mountain of fuckery I think I came down with a cold. I am not complain, I love my career and the tons of money it pays me. I’m not even making excuses as to why I am not active around here. Because none of you would care and I don’t have to tell you why I am not active. I am saying this because the beginning of the end is coming and its coming fast. My baby is due very soon, put my house on the market to get a bigger house even though my current one is more than big enough for my family with 5 bedrooms. I just need a bigger garage for my growing collection. A bigger driveway and a less of a fuck head of a neighbour. With stupid fucking comments like “Oh here I am mowing your lawn yet again, will you ever do mine?” it’s like fuck you cocksucker I never asked you to do it. I will never do your lawn because I pay a lawn care company to do mind, I don’t need your old ass doing it. It’s not neighbourly if you are pointing out that you are doing something nice. That’s just being an asshole. I should know. So with all that and whole wack of shit more the end is coming faster for me then I thought. Orion is still happening and he will be truly epic but that is literally the only thing I will be doing once he is created. I will not be posting around the forum, hell don’t even message me because I will not have the time or even care enough to respond. I highly suggest enjoying Orion because he will truly be the last truly great player in this league. No I am not saying on the ice. Sure he will be amazing in the sim like SWC3 was, but the story and hype has never been seen before nor will it be seen again. It truly is my swan song, I thought that I would retire him and stick around to post odd posts here and there but that’s probably not going to happen. The last 2 weeks I came on maybe for 5min combined. Both on Sundays. I have a grand plan for my retirement speech for both me and my player. It will probably span a few days leaving people on pins and needles wanting to see what I say next. Finished by something truly… Robbie.

Player Name: Ko Kane VHL Team: Davos Cash you have: $18,500,000 Purchase Name: Old But Not Forgotten Cost of Purchase: $10,000,000 Cash Left: $8,500,000 I AM BUYING THIS FOR THE S63 SEASON!!!

1500 words

If you think this is going to be a puff piece then you are sadly mistaken. Sure TLO is my “friend” and I don’t want to make fun of him too much… Wait a minute, YES I DO! This will not be written by “Nice Robbie” this is the normal asshole you all know and love… to hate. So let me get started. To start the season Davos was expected to be the championship favorite and things took a hard slice right from there. Why? Well I have a theory and it starts in net. Shawn Brodeur, sure he is 3rd in the league with wins. Only because he plays for the 3rd “best team” His Save Percentage is just horrible at 0.909 which puts him in 5th best. Two goalies on shittier teams have a better Save Percentage. His GAA is not outright bad but could be better at 2.38. Now why do I point all that out? Because my theory is the Shawn is pretty much thinking about retiring and gave up on bettering himself. His agent a man that just lives on a whim and has an attention span of a peanut. Probably was distracted by a butterfly as his client said he was giving up. Thus brought on the beginning of the end of Shawn being one of the best goalies in the league. While his team mates would go “GTL” (Yes a Jersey Shore reference and no I do not watch) Shawn rather now be seen at the local burger joint in Davos that claims to have 100 different burgers. He is on a mission to eat all these burgers. Not only once but enough times to taste every spice every ingredient. You see, his new life goal is to become a food critic. His first “job” has made him fat. All those burgers have slowed him down. To the point the team has welcomed a long road trip to keep him away from the burgers that he loves so much. Team captain Ko Kane has been spotted punching his goalie square in the head each time he would suggest going to eat somewhere that would sell burgers. The problem has gotten so bad that the players now call him Jughead. The burger loving Archie comics character. Not the character from Riverdale. The team is also is said to have held an intervention trying to stop Shawn’s self-destructive behaviour. Players told him that if he does not stop getting fatter they will no longer invite him to team outings and after they all move past the VHL he will be forgotten. Ko Kane’s speech sounded something like this “Shawn you and I used to be close friends. Remember going around town and throwing pies and homeless people then laughing. It was charity because we were feeding them but they had it all over their face. I often think back to times like that and think why don’t we do things like that anymore. Looking back I see that was a team bonding exercise and it brought us together. Like family. But now you are different. You are distant and you don’t care anymore. Is it because Elinor left you for that bouncer named Rick? Is she really the reason why you don’t care anymore? Fuck her. She aint worth the time. She is a dirty little (Altercation breaks out before Ko Kane can finish what he was going to call her) Okay… I see maybe that was too far. But all I am saying is that it’s a good thing that she is gone. She was a dirty fuck slut. Hell she offered me head and I acc…(Shawn dives to attack Ko Kane but his weight slows him down) Okay! Sheesh! Look bro. I know you have been eating a lot because you are alone and you have no pussy to fuck. But how do you expect to get more pussy when you look like that? You want to eat hundreds of burgers because you think you will be taken seriously as a food critic. No one will give a shit about what you have to say. They will laugh at you, much like they laugh at you now because you just flat out suck in net. You fucked us like you never got to with Elinor. You fucked us out of a 2nd title. As team captain I will no longer take this lightly. If you do not seek help I will no longer hang with you, I will delete you off my phone and I will no longer let you come tag along on my wild party nights. You will be the social pariah of the team and you will feel even worse about yourself. When you walk into a room we will leave. When you go for a fist bump it will be smacked away. During games we will leave you to defend for yourself. You want to fuck this team? We will do it right back. How does 100 shots faced per game sound to you? You fat fuck! Huh? ANSWER ME! Stop eating that fucking burger! FUCK! OKAY I’M DONE WITH YOU!” Shawn refused to seek help in the form of a personal trainer and nutritionist. Shawn told them that it is his body and he can eat whatever he wants. As you can tell by Ko Kane’s speech that Shawns issues have cut deep with this team. They do not like what is going on but they cannot do anything about it. The one guy that is supposed to be stopping the pucks is not. The only reason why he has not let in more goals is because he is pure fatness. He takes up too much of the net so the opposing team has less to shoot at. Shawn is so fat not that his reaction speed is non-existent if a puck is shot at his glove side he would only react a full three seconds later. That is pretty sad and very bad. Shawn literally has become just a body in net. A man with no passion for the game and no passion to go forward in life. He has forgotten how to skate, or well… he is too fat to skate is more accurate. The team has to help him glide out to his net. When he falls down or goes down for a delayed save attempt the team has to help him sand back up. To the point he has been instructed to that if he goes down for a save cover the puck with his fat to stop the play. That way the team is not helping him get up while the other team has the puck or they have the puck but two players are helping him up so taking those players out of the rush. Generally you would think the D would stick back in a rush and help him up so that way the D are back when the opposing team comes back down the ice but most of the time it does not work out like that. Davos has gone from the best team in the league last season to the cup favorite during the offseason to well the laughing stock. They cannot win with Shawn in net because of this horrible depression and self-destructive behavior. Players have threatened to tie Shawn to the net so that way he does not fall down. So his pure mass will just stop the puck. They are coming up with new and inventive ways to keep him happy while tied to the net. Like a burger feeding system which is basically a t shirt cannon firing burgers at him whenever he is done eating one. A season where the team was not supposed to win may have brought on this change. Once Shawn won the cup he thought that he did not have to do anything anymore. He had nothing driving him forward in his VHL career. He won the cup that many players have not hoisted. He thought why try now when he already won the cup. He will forever go down as a champion so why would he need to try anymore. It’s truly sad and makes players that are forced to be on his team very mad. They are mad because they could have been repeat champions this season and their goalie is in “I don’t fucking care anymore” mode. One man has taken the team by hostage and has driven it into the ground. Thanks Shawn you lazy fat bastard. I needed this to break away a bit from “Nice Robbie” your selfish ways have fucked the team this season and I doubt you can correct the course enough now to save the season. Why don’t you go stuff a burger down your throat and don’t use anything to wash it down. We may be better off with our backup goalie at this point. Which would be the ultimate slap to Shawn’s face and maybe would make him snap out of this funk that he is in.

They got some okay guys, but giving that 1st rounder to Colorado will bite them in the ass. It may end up being 1st overall.

Colorado is the true winner of the trade today. Sakic must be laughing today. People must be asking him why are you laughing and he just continues to laugh.

Yes for me

Brodeur @TheLastOlympian07

If you think that Nice Robbie is dead, then you are sadly mistaken. I am still here. I just don’t have time to come around and push my “niceness” you should be thanking me for keeping assholic egomaniac Robbie off of here. It’s a hard job because when he gets bored he posts shit that generally pisses people off. Fuck you “Nice Robbie” That actually in fact that was a pretty assholic thing to say. Why would you put niceness in quotes? If you are nice then say nice and not “nice” that’s like saying something is “free” you are a gimmick and you are pretty much dead. I on the other hand will be here till the last day of Orion Slade. Why? Because I am not a gimmick. I just am. Just am? Who are you? Terminator? Will you be back? Do you want me to get to the chopper?... wait no. GET TO DA CHOPPA!!!! GET DOWN!!!! This whole egomaniac thing has run out of steam, it’s about time we kill Robbie the original version. I am 2.0, I am better. Sure it maybe creepy to have a nice Robbie because everyone sees me as an asshole but they will get used to it. They will never get used to you. That is why you are leaving. Maybe just leave overall and I will stay. I don’t want them to get used to it. I am who I am. I am the fucking Terminator because I just go around and fuck shit up. The end days are here. You’re T-1000 and I am here to fucking stop you. Come at me bro and we will finally see who the true Robbie is. Um you are the evil one. That would make you T-1000 get your movie facts straight bro. Plus since I am the nice one I don’t look for fights. I am nice guy, I don’t need to fight you to prove to you that I am better then you. All I have to do is let you come out and play more. Show everyone that they would prefer me over you. You will be voted out of here and I will stay. Voted out? This isn’t survivor, this isn’t politics. This is a fucking gimmick. A gimmick that I will kill because I am legit bored by it. So say your last words my boring friend. They will be the last ones you ever speak. You legit make me yawn when you try to make a point. I don’t bore people. Sure I annoy them, but that is intentional, but when they see you speak it’s like wow Robbie has become dull as fuck, where is the Robbie wit? Where is the asshole that we know and not this asshole we don’t Try to destroy me. Just try it. You will soon realize that I will not go into the night. I am here to stay so get used to it. I am that little angel on your shoulder. The good guy who tells you good things to do. You just chose not to listen. Good angel? Don’t make me laugh. If this is true where’s the other guy. You know the fucking DEVIL ROBBIE? … RIGHT HERE!!!!!...

Huh?

To call them "People" is giving them too much credit. I don't talk to my family. Fuck them. I don't give them the time of day. My mom was on the phone with her as seconds before the tower fell. They won't tell me what her last words were. They won't tell me if she was trying to get out. I know for a fact they told her I was coming to get her. She and they knew I was in town. I was on my "30 cities in 30 days" party tour. So she might have thought I was coming. So her possible last thoughts were I failed her. I don't know anything. All I know I was in New York and I failed to get there.

I don't feel bad. Just question things that lead up to the tower following. I talked to her that morning. I was just getting back from a party so I was downright fucked. I heard the plane hit and i headed that way. Watching that tower fall was well... horrible. I'll just say that. I know she survived that impact of the plane. She called my mom, she even tried calling me but I was... getting head. I only found out after my buddy turned on the TV. Tried calling back and nothing. What if I answered that call? would I have been able to get to the tower in time? who the fuck knows. Thats the burning question that will pretty much haunt me the rest of my life. I'm not "depressed" or anything like that because of this. It's just haunting questions of what if. These questions only pop up once a year. The rest of the year I don't even think about it.

I know that most likely there was nothing I could do. She was above the impact site.

Okay not exactly 17 years yet. But on Tuesday is 9/11. It only hit me today because fucking History Channel "THANKS ASSHOLES!" it hits me hard each year because I lost my sister. I was in NY when it happened and watched the tower fall knowing that she was inside. I tried my hardest to get to the building but was not able to get there on time. Hell if I did get there, I wouldn't be writing this right now. I guess I have survivors guilt. I don't talk to my family for a whole host of reasons but they did tell me after it happened that I should have tried harder to save her. Any fucking ways! This is not the reason why I am making this post. Do not post in here with patriotism, or slurs against muslims. This is for remembrance. Share your story of where you were when you found out. Did you know anyone who died? First time I will be on a Tuesday 9/11 since it happened on Tuesday 9/11 2001. It will be odd to say the least. Hell I am even flying on Tuesday.

Yes

Nothing I do is odd

And the 3rd number is 21. House wins. Next draw is September 22nd. The new jackpot is $1500. Yes instead of upping it 250 I will up it $500 each time the house wins.

The second number. So the first 2 numbers are 65 and 69 the 3rd number will be released in 20min to build suspense. There is a good chance that "The House" may have already lost