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MUNK FOR COMMISH

 

English version below

 

sttng aotp teh vhl ar teh mmbrz of teh blu taem, 3 fin komssionrz and jrdi, al of wohm gvoenr teh vhl, dceidnig teh rluz, whrng out tp, and issung bnaz.  wihl diz mmbrz ar doin an adqat job wtih al of diz, adqat iz not eonuhg fer diz lagu.  wat diz lagu rali ndez iz a cmssnr who wil revlutionz teh wai teh lagu oprtz, smoeno who iz exrtemli actv evri dai, pstng on a rgular bsiz, and msot imprtantl, smoeno who sepazk fuletn dulan.

 

teh dulan ppltion of diz lagu ar drstcli undererpesentd.  teh lagu iz vrei dviesr, wtih englsh sepakrez, fernhc sepazk, and wahteevr autsraia and bum liek tu cal thir lngag, but tehr iz an incrsng aomutn of dulan bing osberevd.  w hev sen incrsng rqeuetsz fer translatn, mur mmbrz attmptng tu spak dulan, and inrceaed cuirosti, yet teh lagu hez ben solw tu maek teh neecssri cahnzg tu adpt.  teh sloutoin.  mnuk.

 

h iz teh laegu’ez prmoinnt dulan mmebre, wrtng and sepaknig diz lngag wtih vritula no effotr.  mur so, h iz pefrecli fuletn in englsh, and iz wliign tu attempt tu spak fernhc.  wihl teh ltatre culd us soem addtnal wrok, h iz nnthlsz a mmebre wtih a unqu set of sklz dat teh vhl sohudl uitlzi. 

 

frthrmor, h doz hev perviuoz komssionng exeprinc.  on teh sit dat sahl not b nmed, h srevde sveral ssnz az teh laegu’ez msot bloved cmssnr, atcign in a fiar mnanre tu ecnouarg atcivti wihl cntrling tp inlfaton.  druign diz yarz, dat lagu flrshed.  w wuld bnefit frum hvaign him wrng blu.

 

teh imoprtnt qeustoin tu asnwre iz, who sohudl w rmov frum teh cruetn grup of vhl komssionrz?  sur, w culd hev 5 komssionrz, but wtih 5 mmbrz of teh blu taem, teh ttil wuld maen amlots nthng.  wtih blu mmebre nmaz bing dsihde out liek tp, i agru, wat wuld b teh pint of hvaign ani mmbrz atcign az komssionrz?  dat wuld not du, and teh lagu wil ned tu scariifc at last 1 cmssnr

 

jrdi – hiz smiign hez ben rtahre cnsstent az of lat, a srpris cmopaerd tu a few ssnz ago.  nnthlsz, hiz rol, wihl imoprtnt, culd b esaiil fled bi hggnz, who atcz az teh smer fer teh lagu on dyaz wer jrdi iz unvlabl. h iz expendible.
 
draper – h tlod m dat i cuold’nt nam mi palyre wat i trli wnatde tu, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).  h sohudl b fred!
 
hggnz – h cna sim, but dat iz not eevn hiz mian rol.  h iz 1 of teh 2 prmoinnt annunkemnt annncrz.  h iz a rok, and iz uesflu, so h sohudl stai.
 
lfiersfn – h wuold’nt accetp mi tard offr wehn i offered him ed gr.  exepndbl. 

 

so, in cnclson, mnuk sohudl b hred, and evron accetp hggnz sohudl b fred.  thnk yu.

 

 

_______________________________________________________________________________________

 

MUNK FOR COMMISH

 

Sitting atop the VHL are the members of the blue team, 3 fine commissioners and Jardy, all of whom govern the VHL, deciding the rules, whoring out TPE, and issuing bans.  While these members are doing an adequate job with all of this, adequate is not enough for this league.  What this league really needs is a commissioner who will revolutionize the way the league operates, someone who is extremely active every day, posting on a regular basis, and most importantly, someone who speaks fluent dolan.

 

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The dolan population of this league are drastically underrepresented.  The league is very diverse, with English speakers, French speaks, and whatever Australia and Boom like to call their language, but there is an increasing amount of dolan being observed.  We have seen increasing requests for translation, more members attempting to speak dolan, and increased curiosity, yet the league has been slow to make the necessary changes to adapt.  The solution.  MUNK.

 

He is the league’s prominent dolan member, writing and speaking this language with virtually no effort.  More so, he is perfectly fluent in English, and is willing to attempt to speak French.  While the latter could use some additional work, he is nonetheless a member with a unique set of skills that the VHL should utilize. 

 

1307920884001.jpg

 

Furthermore, he does have previous commissioning experience.  On the site that shall not be named, he served several seasons as the league’s most beloved commissioner, acting in a fair manner to encourage activity while controlling TPE inflation.  During these years, that league flourished.  We would benefit from having him wearing blue.

 

The important question to answer is, who should we remove from the current group of VHL commissioners?  Sure, we could have five commissioners, but with five members of the blue team, the title would mean almost nothing.  With blue member names being dished out like TPE, I argue, what would be the point of having any members acting as commissioners?  That would not do, and the league will need to sacrifice at least one commissioner.

 

Jardy His simming has been rather consistent as of late, a surprise compared to a few seasons ago.  Nonetheless, his role, while important, could be easily filled by Higgins, who acts as the simmer for the league on days where Jardy is unavailable. He is expendable.

 

Draper He told me that I couldn’t name my player what I truly wanted to, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).  He should be fired!

 

Higgins He can sim, but that is not even his main role.  He is one of the two prominent announcement announcers.  He is a rock, and is useful, so he should stay.

 

Flyersfan He wouldn’t accept my trade offer when I offered him Ed Grr.  Expendable.

 

So, in conclusion, Munk should be hired, and everyone except Higgins should be fired.  Thank you.

Edited by edgar
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https://vhlforum.com/topic/19786-munk-for-commish-final-sixsix/
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Content: 3/3 - A little over 450 words, so it hits the word count. Fine here. Decent argument

Grammar: 2/2 - Couldn't find anything, at least not in the actual article. ;)

Appearance: 1/1 - Is good, mang.

Overall: 6/6

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