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What does the ‘A’ in AGM really stand for?


ColeMrtz

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     For a long time the VHL has been victim to a common misconception. Most members of the league have been led to believe that the acronym AGM stands for “Assistant General Manager”. After both studying AGMing at both the minor league level as well as at the pro level, being an AGM myself, I can say with 100% confidence that this is simply not the case. But if the ‘A’ doesn’t stand for Assistant, then what does it stand for? That’s right, it stand for Actual.

     Starting with my minor league research, we look at the Hounds Actual General Manager, @Berocka. Berocka for starters is the most active member of the Hounds discord, more than the believed GM @GustavMattias. He has a positive impact on all members of the team, beloved by rostered and alumni players alike. Gustav on the other hand, is a point of ridicule from all who come in contact with him, and even managed to inspire multiple revolutions against him. In an attempt to mask his clear shortcomings to the esteemed Berocka, he has levied claims of “racism” and “not being real” against him. These campaigns have had varying levels of success, but Berocka, being the Actual General Manager that he is always manages to take back to lockeroom. In fact, he’s even taken the channel that he does all the Actual General Manager work and made it appear that he’s doing the work for Gustav in order to quell his rantings, naming it “AGM Slave Work”.

     To further this research we come to my own role, as the Actual General Manager of the New York Americans. You can ask anyone of this fact, and they will tell you right away that I hold the team over @Esso2264. Specifically @HulkHogan and @Dil have been adamant about spreading this truth to the league. Even Esso himself has said that his AGM (Actual General Manager) does all the work, stating “all I know is I don’t GM and it’s my AGM”. Even roles generally thought to be handled by the GMs are carried out by the Actual General Manager, with myself doing lines more often than not (and successful lines mind you).
     I rest my case. What more proof is needed? Clearly AGMs are running their respective teams throughout the league while the GMs reap the credit. Actual General Managers will no longer be FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY by GMs, and will instead be given the true respect and recognition they deserve. Due to these undeniable truths, I propose that AGMs deserve their own color on discord. That is all.

     For legal purposes and so that I do not get fired this is all satire and jokes I’m legally bound to make these statements none of the people named in this article have done anything to implicate themselves I’m bullshitting a disclaimer to hit word count thank you very much. Oh and also I’m going to ping @ShawnGlade because he needs to let the boys know what’s good.

 

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13 minutes ago, ColeMrtz said:

Oh so we got a real funny guy eh? A real comedian up here

No I was the Ass Captain in Mexico City this season it definitely means Ass General Manager. 

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