Red

Review: lmao this absolutely beautiful. idk who tf lemon head is but i'm sure they'll love this. i like how all the yellow including the background goes with the theme of lemons. maybe you could've also made the Chicago logo yellow to match but it doesn't really matter. 9/10

Imma start a weekly thing because I never know what to write for these. Basically my idea is to do weekly updates on players leading in categories such as Points, Goals, Assists, Points by Defensemen, Rookie scoring, Wins and Save %. Points # Player GP P 1 Dakota Lamb (WAR) 23 39 2 Groovy Dood (DCD) 23 37 3 Andrew Su (VAN) 22 36 4 Uhtred (WAR) 23 34 5 Aloe Dear (WAR) 23 33 6 Alex Letang (DCD) 23 33 7 Patrik Laine (HSK) 23 32 8 Valtteri Vaakanainen (HSK) 23 32 9 John Merrick (LAS) 23 32 10 Kasper Kankkunen (LDN) 22 32 RIP to anyone who choose Mikko Lahtinen in their fantasy lmfao. At the top we got sum new dudes with Dakota Lamb leading the pack after falling off a bit after his sensational rookie season. After him we got Groovy Dood who lead scoring for a good length of time last season and Andrew Su who is quickly become a mainstay superstar in this era of the VHL. Surprisingly there's like two defensemen in here, idk if that's normal but good for you. Goals # Player GP G 1 Groovy Dood (DCD) 23 18 2 Dakota Lamb (WAR) 23 16 3 Chicken Wing (NYA) 23 15 4 Julian Nousiainen (LDN) 22 15 5 John Merrick (LAS) 23 15 6 Patrik Laine (HSK) 23 15 7 Isabella Campbell (SEA) 23 14 8 Andrew Su (VAN) 22 14 9 Christian Mingle (CHI) 23 14 10 Jim Bob (SEA) 23 13 Again at the top of the pack we see Groovy Dood and Dakota Lamb proving to everybody that pass first players are not a good idea. Right after that in third there is a defensemen for some reason, Chicken Wing by some miracle of Jesus has 15 goals and 6 assists as a defensemen. blame new york weird shit always happens there. Assists # Player GP A 1 Kasper Kankkunen (LDN) 22 27 2 Spencer Elsby (CHI) 23 25 3 Uhtred (WAR) 23 23 4 Dakota Lamb (WAR) 23 23 5 Aloe Dear (WAR) 23 23 6 General Zod (RIG) 23 22 7 Valtteri Vaakanainen (HSK) 23 22 8 Alex Letang (DCD) 23 22 9 Roque Davis (LAS) 23 22 10 Andrew Su (VAN) 22 22 Expectedly here we have defensemen doing what they should be doing. Kasper Kankkunen leads with 27 with Elsby not too far behind. That's all I got to say about that, assists are boring. Defensemen # Player GP P 1 Alex Letang (DCD) 23 33 2 Kasper Kankkunen (LDN) 22 32 3 Micah Adrienne (VAN) 22 29 4 Jolly Greene Giant (TOR) 23 29 5 Matty Socks (CHI) 23 28 6 Roque Davis (LAS) 23 28 7 Spencer Elsby (CHI) 23 27 8 General Zod (RIG) 23 26 9 DeFenz Mann (DCD) 23 26 10 Emi Rune (HSK) 23 26 Speaking of d-men the aforementioned Alex Letang leads with 33 points. Did not know Kasper Kankkunen was right behind him tbh but there he is. After those two we got the Walmart version of Condor Adrienne as well as former 2nd overall pick Jolly Greene Giant. Also funny enough, even after scoring 15 fucking goals chicken wing is somehow not on this list. Rookies # Player GP P 1 Brian Moreau (DAV) 24 20 2 Rolf Fizzlebeef Jr (CGY) 22 17 3 Duncan Idaho (MOS) 23 15 4 Olof Samuelsson (DAV) 24 15 5 Phoenix Dawson (SEA) 23 15 6 Jim Allen (DAV) 24 15 7 Jon Webber (TOR) 23 15 8 Philip Stein (MOS) 23 14 9 Zeedayno Chara (NYA) 23 14 10 Paul Atreides (MOS) 23 14 A 22nd overall pick is leading rookie scoring lfg lmao. Hope Brian Moreau runs away with this as that would be pretty funny. Top picks Rolf Fizzlebeef Jr and Duncan Idaho are right behind him. I would pray for one or both of them to tear there Achilles but unfortunately that's not possible. Wins # Player GP W 1 Jean Pierre Camus (CHI) 23 16 2 Grekkark Gyrfalcon (PRG) 23 16 3 Doug Dimmadome (LAS) 19 14 4 Ajay Krishna (WAR) 20 14 5 Zamboni Driver (HSK) 20 12 6 Jaxx Hextall (TOR) 19 10 7 Rara Rasputin (SEA) 22 10 8 Kunibuni UnGuri (DAV) 20 9 9 Calvin Harvey (RIG) 17 8 10 Artem Tretiak (MAL) 18 8 Anybody who's not a goalie will probably stop reading at this point so imma just go out and say Calvin Harvey's got this one in the bag. idgaf if he's in 9th rn. Save % # Player GP SV% 1 Aksu Maronen (SEA) 3 0.961 2 Jurgis Kalvelis Blazevicius (DAV) 4 0.952 3 Kloxified (CHI) 1 0.95 4 Trent Gibson (HSK) 3 0.95 5 Woody McPine (MAL) 6 0.944 6 Doug Dimmadome (LAS) 19 0.934 7 Grekkark Gyrfalcon (PRG) 23 0.929 8 Ajay Krishna (WAR) 20 0.927 9 Artem Tretiak (MAL) 18 0.924 10 Jean Pierre Camus (CHI) 23 0.922 Again this is Calvin Harvey's to lose what did you expect

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what's so bad about that

1. BIG FUCKING DUBS BOIS 2. us cause why not 3. i will stick with big zod if not then McLaren 4. the goat Jan Hlozek 5. Ilya Mihkeyev 6. the egg

4/4/21

I couldn't look at this graphic too long in fear of busting in my pants. Black and White graphics are always sick for some reason. The smoke around the player and glossy background are what really make this graphic stand out for me. The choice of font maybe could have been better but I still like how you had the first name all in outline and the last name filled out. 9/10

Review: I like this alot. it's very simple and clean and there's a lot of cool touches and effects that make it pop out a bit. I like how there's a little bit of a shadow on the background and the player, it makes the graphic look a lot less plain which is good. My favourite part of the graphic tho is definitely the font. The font choice is great and I really love the pink and light blue outlines around them, it gives a Miami vice kind of vibe and really works well with the background. 9/10

With not much else to write about Imma just share my thoughts on how my teams roster is looking like and what my expectations are for this season. To me this team is similar to the team we were at the end of last season except slightly better. We replaced both our two best defensemen who retired with better defensemen making our D-core stronger. Our forwards look very similar with the exceptions of a couple of VHLM call ups. If we are as good as we were at the end of last season I have no doubt we'll make the playoffs. Through the latter half of last season we were 20-9 or something like that so if we can repeat that success it would be great. Also it's pretty cool to see some more prospects push through the 250 TPE barrier. Jared Carter @jaredc7 looks like a steal at 87th overall already and Matthew Sovick Jr @matt sovick looks like he'll be the the lowest drafted player to ever make the VHL which is dope. Sharkton @TheOGShark and Nexber @Domino Draws are also long awaited and exciting additions to the team. as for expectations I'm hopeful we can make the playoffs again, I know that's never guaranteed but if were any better than we were last season we should make it

Imma rate each teams positional strength based on depth and quality for the sole purpose of making GM's feel bad about themselves. I'll do this by rating centers, wingers, defensemen and goalies from a range of A to F for each team so I can give people PTSD from there years in grade school. Also I understand a lot of teams have centers who play the wing so I will try to guess which centers are actually centers and which have been moved to the wing. Calgary Wranglers Its clear most of there offence will come form there wingers as they aren't too strong down the middle. They have a very bright future in defense but they aren't quite at a top tier level yet. There goaltending is also decent but not spectacular. Centers: D+ Wingers: B- Defensemen: C+ Goalies: C+ Chicago Phoenix A very strong all around team Chicago has a smallish roster with a lot of quality. They should finish near the top of the table once again as they have no clear weakness. Centers: A- Wingers: A Defensemen: A Goalies: B+ D.C. Dragons Similar to Calgary they have a bit of a weakness at center but are much stronger in other places. There strong goaltending and defensemen should put them in contention for a playoff spot. Centers: C+ Wingers: B Defensemen: B+ Goalies: A HC Davos Dynamo This will be a rebuilding year for Davos as they most likely finish near the bottom of the standings. There glaring weaknesses are at forward as Taro Tsujimoto is there only notable player up front. Centers: C Wingers: D Defensemen: B- Goalies: B- Helsinki Titans With arguably the best forward core in the league Helsinki has incredible quality and depth at center. There wingers are not too far behind and there goaltending is also top tier. This should be a very high scoring team. Centers: A+ Wingers: B Defensemen: B- Goalies: A- London United After some aggressive moves in the offseason the London united are ready to make the playoffs again. Mikko Lahtinen will make there offense much more threatening and Jacob Tonn will surely steal London many games. Centers: A+ Wingers: B Defensemen: B Goalies: A+ Los Angeles Stars LA has an interesting setup with many centers and not too many wingers. It will also be interesting to see how two superstar centers play in the same lineup. Also with Roque Davis joining the team there Defense is now also among the best in the league. Will these improvements carry them out of the basement? maybe. Watching Davos struggle with a seemingly strong roster on paper makes me think LA might not break the curse. Centers: A+ Wingers: C- Defensemen: A Goalies: B Malmo Nighthawks After recently winning the continental cup Malmo is now at a crossroads as they are not as strong as they used to be. It's not too clear if they are going into a rebuild as they still have some good pieces and depth. They will be a thorn to whoever tries to make the playoffs in the EU for sure. Centers: C- Wingers: B Defensemen: B- Goalies: B Moscow Menace Moscow's direction is more clear as they are entering there first season of there rebuild. They have very good depth but lack star power in all positions. With the additions of Idaho and Atreides it won't be long for Moscow to be a team to fear again but for now they will have to settle with mediocrity. Centers: C+ Wingers: C+ Defensemen: C Goalies: B- New York Americans New York hasn't come out of there rebuild just yet as they still don't have quality players to lead them into the playoffs. Prospects such as Red Lite and Zeedayno Chara still need time to develop into star players but for now New York will probably place around the bottom of the standings one more time. Centers: C Wingers: C Defensemen: C- Goalies: B- Prague Phantoms Prague is a rare top heavy roster with many good quality forwards surrounded by a lot of depth. There defense isn't quite at that level as they have four good depth pieces but no star. Nevertheless, there strong goaltending should allow them to score there way into the playoffs as they should be a very competitive team. Centers: A- Wingers: B+ Defensemen: C+ Goalies: B Riga Reign Big hype. I'll try to be unbiased on this one but I think our roster is very well rounded. We have depth in all positions with a good mix of youth and vets. Our goaltending is what I believe to be our biggest strength as Calvin Harvey is an absolute stud who should have another great season. Centers: B+ Wingers: B- Defensemen: B+ Goalies: A Seattle Bears Seattle will be a sneaky good team this season imo. They have strength in every position especially on the wing with players such as Jim Bob and timothy Brown. Seattle will kost likely make the playoffs and will once again be a contender in the playoffs. Centers: B Wingers: A+ Defensemen: B Goalies: B- Toronto Legion Toronto is very close to coming out of there rebuild, but there not quite there yet. Similar to other rebuilding teams they have depth but not many top tier players as of right now. They have very promising core of young defensemen and some enticing forward prospects which could make this team a force in the future. I can see Toronto squeaking into a playoff spot maybe but it will be tight. Centers: C+ Wingers: C+ Defensemen: C+ Goalies: A- Vancouver Wolves Vancouver is a very interesting team to me as they are transitioning from one gm to another. As of right now they have a massive gap in quality from there centers and goaltenders which makes them the most unique roster in this list. There centers are amongst the best in the league with Andrew Su and SS Hornet yet there goaltending is arguably the worst in the league. Vancouver could be looking to construct a deal to move out one of there strong pieces at forward for some help on the backend to balance there roster. Centers: A+ Wingers: B- Defensemen: B- Goalies: D+ Warsaw Predators After coming off an impressive continental cup run Warsaw remain one of the strongest teams in the league. They are built very similarly to the team that they met in the finals in Chicago as they too have a smallish roster with a lot of quality players. Therefore, no one should be surprised to see Warsaw at the top of the EU again. Centers: A Wingers: A- Defensemen: B+ Goalies: B+ Claiming for: 3/28/21 4/4/21

i think velvera's still hasn't been claimed yet

OwO

1. worst part is how long it is. best part is the amount of TPE you can get from it i guess 2. read the bible 3. think were up there but Chicago rn is the strongest for me 4. is 5. I'd prank you by promising to write next weeks press conference questions.... I would then proceed to not do them just so I can watch you get muted in the LR by hedge lol. 6. you already know the answer bb

On March the 20th The Riga Reign held a pre season interview with one of there many rising stars to get a sense of what there mindset is going into to a new season. The Reign have a plethora of prospects who are now transitioning into leadership roles as they advance further into there careers. Reporter: after a successful rookie season last year what are your expectations for yourself and Riga in the upcoming campaign. McJake: For myself I'll be happy if I had a relatively similar season to last year. I think my main goal and focus is with the team and how far we can go this season. We are still extremely deep and young and intend on growing along throughout the season, I think the bare minimum expectation is that we make the playoffs and hopefully we can get through a round or two once we get there. Reporter: How does it feel now to not be a rookie, is there a difference in the way you handle yourself in the locker room or are you pretty much the same. McJake: For the most part yes I believe being a veteran hasn't changed me that much but there are some little things that are different about not being a rookie. Being a veteran means taking a bit more responsibility in the locker room when it comes to engaging others. Now I try to be open and helpful to younger Riga prospects in order to help them and welcome them to our team. On the ice all that's changed is just being a little more vocal and a little less wide eyed. All in all, being a veteran just means having a bit more responsibly for your team and your teammates. Reporter: Is there anything in your rookie season you regret or anything that you learned that you'll use to improve on this season as you move toward a more veteran role. McJake: I think my play in my first season was a little risky. I tended to be too offensively oriented and often times found myself out of position which caused defensive lapses on my end. I don't necessarily regret playing that way but I do think I need to be better defensively in the future to make sure I am an all around player. Off the ice I think I'll need to be more of a presence, as rookie it was good enough to just play hockey and do my thing but know it will be increasingly important to communicate with my teammates on the bench and be a team player.

G - Jacob Tonn @DMaximus

D - Victor Grachev @Esso2264

F - Ray Shields @DMaximus

F - Red Lite @Esso2264

ayo @Victor if u can't find anyone to do Velvera's builder article u know I'm always free bb

i'll apply

F - Groovy Dood @DMaximus

fuck it, that's enough to convince me.

The Riga Marauders live on, lmao