sadie

NYA really was the only option sadly. This is amazing and I will be ordering myself a WWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWW jersey as soon as they are available!

Jesse Teno kicks puppies and steals candy from babies. They push old people to the ground and yell at customer service members just trying to get through the day. They are a troll online and on the ice. Jesse Teno is the most hated player in the VHL to date and there is no stopping them.
 
Teno was in more fights than any other player in high school, college, and now the VHL. For a goalie, they are quite the menace and unofficial enforcer of the London United. Get in their crease? Hope you didn’t need that knee cap. Tap their pads one too many times at a rebound attempt, guess you didn’t need those teeth after all. Teno has also been documented as the goalie with the most broken sticks not only in a season, but in a single game. During a recent 5-2 loss to Moscow, Teno was so fed up with losing to Olober Syko that they broke a stick with every goal scored against them. It’s rumored that some of the stick shards ended up in some other player’s skin like large splinters. Apparently, the equipment manager also had to run out during the 2nd intermission to go buy back-up sticks.
 
Outside of the VHL, Teno has also managed to get in some hot water with the SEC and the IRS as allegations of fraud and embezzlement have been linked towards their foundation. According to sources, while The Teno Foundation may has raised $4.2 million total, it seems that only about $1.5 million of that money has actually been spent on charitable causes. Documents and financial statements claim that nearly all of the money has been spent however investigators tell us that much of the equipment was purchased second hand. It would seem that the Teno Foundation also failed to pay many of their contractors who built and refurbished the rinks. On top of the lack of money spent on the focus of the charity, other sources have also spotted Teno driving around in not only a top-of-the-line Tesla, but a 2024 Mercedes-Benz G-Class, a Ducati Panigale V4 R, and they had also been seen at a Rolls-Royce dealership in Manhattan while on break. If these allegations prove true, then the London admins must be happy to be seeing the goalie go after this season.

It seems while investigating the above allegations against London United Goalie Jesse Teno, our offices were broken into and most of our paperwork related to the case has been stolen or destroyed. Some were found inside the office shredder. We do not know if Teno themselves did this or if it was some other bad actors protecting them, but we have brought in the FBI to investigate the break-in and theft. We are also unsure as to how anyone knew of our investigation as our work has yet to go public. No one in this publication has made any mention of it outside of the office. We believe that Teno may have someone working on the ins…

 
 
506 words for week ending 4/14/2024

Lol I'm right there with you today AJ 🤣

@Members
 
Normally this would just go to the ban thread but given the circumstances I think it's best that everyone know what's going on.
 
It has unfortunately come to the attention of myself and @Acydburn that @Josh has been embezzling league funds for his own purposes. Via his access to the league PayPal he was stripping donation funds as payments for portal, forum, and domain hosting with amounts far higher than were actually needed. Because the line items were things he was paying for we had no reason, for a number of years, to think anything of it and were unaware that the costs were actually far less than what he was reimbursing himself which amounts to potentially thousands of dollars; we're still working out the total figures.
 
Obviously we are completely shocked at this behaviour and have immediately stripped Josh of his role as commissioner pending potential future legal action. We have always held firm that the league funds are used exclusively on league related activities so I am quite frankly pissed that a member of the blue team would take donation money for their own uses; whatever his excuses may be. Please be aware that we will be launching a further investigation and audit of all our costs and funds to be sure that no one else has done anything of the sort in the past.
 
Sincerely,
@Commissioner
 
Edit: In case any future people see the is and don’t see the date; it was purely an April Fool’s joke, Josh was in on it (in fact it was his idea) and the donation money is not only safe but audited.

Happy birthday @Victor

User @ShawnGlade has received a 3 week TPE ban (01/14/2024 to 01/28/2024) for violation of the VHL Code of Conduct section 1.2 in regards to the usage of AI in point tasks.

User @Benson has received a 1 week TPE ban (01/14/2024 to 01/21/2024) for violation of the VHL Code of Conduct section 1.2 in regards to the usage of AI in point tasks.

Hello VHL,
 
Not even gonna bother with a members tag on this one since it's pretty minor stuff but for the sake of transparency I'm announcing it anyway; the @BOG is still tackling bigger problems but we do love to discuss random small stuff too.
 
First up, goalies are just too damn good! Okay that's a bit of an exaggeration but because goalies weren't touched when we nerfed the meta and skaters got a bit worse they have been running away with things a bit more than historically. Save percentages have been climbing, Playoff MVP is almost a foregone conclusion, etc. We could change this with huge sweeping changes to goalie stats and adding hybrid attributes and all that, and that's still on the table for testing as a future option, but it's a bit more complicated than what we realistically need right now. From our testing we can bring goalie stats back down to more of historical averages, without making scoring go too insane, by simply adjusting the goals slider inside the sim. This means the amount of shots won't increase (at least not substantially anyway) but the amount of goals will. As always we aren't going to publicly reveal what our slider settings are but we felt like the league should at least know it's getting adjusted so they aren't confused as to why scoring increases. The slider change will impact all 3 levels of the VHL so the VHLE and VHLM will get it as well for consistency.
 
Second, and this one honestly doesn't come up a ton but it's best to get it in writing: We are formalizing that during the week you re-create you are allowed to max earn (that's 12 capped TPE per week) on both your retiring player and your new player. The caveat to this is that you still cannot claim the same task multiple times. So for example if you have job pay and a media spot on your retiring player in a given week and you re-create you cannot claim that same job pay or media spot on the new player. You can write a new media spot, it doesn't need to be a different kind of task, but it needs to be a new task. Does that make sense? We've kinda been doing this for a bit anyway but there was some confusion around it so we figured it was best to clarify. Also, before anyone asks, for multi-week claims you can still use the same task but need to use a new claim week. So for example if you have a 2000 word media spot and you claim week 1 on your retiring player you can claim week 2 during the same week on your new player and then have 2 weeks left. Each claim effectively is just treated as a new task, the same as it is any other time.
 
Like I said, minor stuff but there it is, enjoy.
 
 - @Commissioner

Will this audit be made public? Will we be able to see how the money we earned from our real life jobs benefitted Josh or potentially others? Or will the use of our money still be for Blues and higher ups eyes only? Can we see how the VHL aims to spend our money moving forward so it is clear to us that this will not happen again? I beg for recruitment drive ads which definitely cost less than the money that went into Josh’s pockets. Let me know because I’d love to see how the VHL is trying to grow from this and from what your members give you to grow it. It’s in my eyes disgusting that a respected member did this, I don’t want to donate any money moving forward unless I actually know where it’s going. 

@CowboyinAmerica

Looking back at my first time scrolling the VHL forums, before I created an account, made a player, and learned the ropes, some I have yet to learn. As someone who struggles with Anxiety, pushing myself to say “fuck it” and go for it came with a lot of hesitance, but in the end, it was so worthwhile. The community is so welcoming, the people here are so kind, I have yet to interact with someone who even comes close to rubbing me the wrong way. All and all it’s been a good experience so far. 
 
My player, Oliver Loo, a name I just slapped together is a player or rather character that I didn’t think I’d be putting so much effort and creativity into although my writing is not the best, needing to be improved upon and I don’t exactly have the means to make graphics. I originally made him just to test the waters, and see if I like how the VHL works under the surface that is the forums. Within the Discord servers, the people and such. It’s a lot more laid back than what I first thought, it’s enjoyable. I like pretty much ever aspect that I have discovered so far and can see myself sticking around. Hell, I even already have plans for my next player and this one isn’t even close to done yet.

230 words

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan

i really do miss the purple though @kirbithan