Phil

Well if you were wondering why Phil "The Rock" Johnson was only getting 4:15 minutes of ice time per game on average over the past week, we at VHL.com might have the reason for you. It was a snowy winter's eve. The snowflakes were all doing their own interpretive waltz to the ground. Some ended their dance on the eyelashes of Phil the Rock. He brushed them away from his vision. "Ah, got some seasonal sentiment, do you?", Kaberle asked. @fromtheinside "Nah, he's problem just mad that he missed ALL his checks in practice," explained the one they call "Cowboy". @Prout "Or the fact that he's just realized that he is the Abdominal Snowman people have been looking for" egged, on Frank @Rayzor_7 Johnson turned slowly towards them, his eyes frosted over, clearly deep in thought... or lack thereof.. okay maybe it wasn't that clear. "Let's just get to the fucking bar". Where in the world were they that there's snow on the ground? Certainly not San Diego. In fact, they were preparing for an away stint against the Yukon Rush. It was 8:00 pm and -30C outside. "Yeah, I guess this Yeti just needs some raw alcohol" piped up Paul @Mr_Hatter "You should all probably know where the line is," warned Red Lite @Tate Johnson turned his attention to the snowy route in front of him and led the charge towards the bar. It was only a few 100 meters away. Soon he'd be sipping his tequila. Man did he need a drink. The team arrived in the quaint wooden bar, abuzz with rowdiness. Duncan ( @OrbitingDeath ) and Gunnar ( @BOOM™) sat down immediately, ordered 4 shots each and began to arm wrestle. Kate Upton ( @OscarTheSwagDude) was immediately swarmed by all the locals. The rest of the team was staggering in when Nero ( @TurnDaddy) who was laughing so hard at a joke by Maksim ( @Nepto) stumbled into the waitress bringing the shots to the arm wrestling match of Duncan and Gunnar. The waitress's tray flow in a perfect parabolic arc and landed directly atop of Johnson's head. That was it - the breaking point. Johnson clenched his fists, strained his neck until the veins in his temples popped out and produced a roar of such magnitude and ferocity that it was actually recorded on the Rchter scale. Chaos and terror ensued. To be.... continued.

Nice work on the trade talks. Nice to hear multiple voices in cast too!

AMAAZING WORK COMMUNITY Using this link to claim the Doubles week Much love all

Rock Bottom #7 Welcome to the Jungle!! I'm your host, Phil Knight. Today we: - HAPPY QUANMASIKUAH BITCHES! - VHL PEOPLE IS GOOD PEOPLE - VHL/M UPDATES - NO ICE TIME = NO OPPONENTS HIT Enjoy this edition! KnightTime Podcast Questions Thread Songs: I Won't Be Home For Christmas - Blink182 Sleigh Ride - Reliant K Not Another Christmas Song - Blink182 This is a division of KnightTime Radio. Run Time: 21 minutes

1. Our 13-Win Streak has been snapped. How would describe the run the Marlins have been on and the 13-Game stretch as a whole? It's been incredible... and it's not really over, just the undefeated part of it. I said from the outset of the season that we'll just get better and better as the season goes on and that's proving true. All parts of our team is proving that true. Such pride at the moment! 2. During our leagues’ high win streak, what were your two favorite games from that run? The ones where I was 3rd star. I've had little offensive output this season so it was nice to be rewarded the couple of times I actually make an impact! 3. Now onto the Trade Deadline. With Myself & IR already having made a couple moves, are you satisfied with how the trade deadline was handled by the Marlins’ front office? You brought in @OrbitingDeath ... how can I not be happy!? Everyone else is gravy. 4. In 32-Games since joining the Marlins, Maksim Yakolevsky [@Nepto] has accumulated 40 points, including 16 goals for the team! Along with being a great addition on the ice, he’s been a vocal member of the team in the lockeroom. What does Yakolevsky bring to the squad that has made him such a great fit in San Diego? @Neptois amazing. Great presence on and off the ice! Leadership skills on and off the ice. Basically everything he does on the ice, he does off the ice - personality wise, anyway. He doesn't just sweat randomly in a grocery store 5. San Diego made some bold moves this past draft, selecting a noncapped defense pairing 1st and 2nd overall, then rolling the dice on an affiliate #1 Center, and two returning VHL greats. With all of those pieces coming together to create what looks to be a contender for the title this season, do you think those moves have already been validated or do you still believe there’s more to prove? There's more to prove. We aren't top of the league. Not sure we will be before the end of the season, but the playoffs will definitely be the test. 6. Our lockeroom has had some deep discussions about certain VHL policies and procedures in the past and with that we’ll open it up to the Press Conference. If we could shoot on the league for a minute on behalf of our command-n-chief, why should @InstantRockstar get a shot at a GM role in the VHL main, where would you like to see him go, and who would you have take over for the Marlins that is NOT @IamMOOSE @InstantRockstarhas always been kind and fair to me. His dealings in the minors have been very good. I believe it's harder building a team in the minors than the majors due to the rapid turnover of players, but he's been a consistent playoff contender year after year after year. I'll tell you that if he was a VHL GM and I was drafted by him, I'd would have full confidence in the team and would immediately re-sign with the team at the first opportunity. You can quote me on that.

In it to win it

In it to win it

In it to win it

It's been a quiet season for the Rock in terms of output... except for what's coming out of his mouth put. The giant humanoid has statistically been not up to the standards of his ego. He currently sits at just 6 points and 120 hits - which is still the lead on the team, but just not enough to validate his talk: "I don't want to say I'm a generational talent... but I can literally move mountains." Now his strength IS quite impressive. According to @Prout, during a practice, coach @InstantRockstar brought in a battle rope and had the top two lines on one end, and The Rock and goaltender @MSO94 on the other end. It was a classic tug-of-war on skates. IR counted down and as soon as it began, the force at which the Rock yanked the rope knocked Olsen to the ground, as well as caused a dominos effect on the opposing side, which saw @Tate fly head first into @fromtheinside, @Nepto threw out his back, @DangerGolding slipped backwards, slicing the jersey clean in half of @BOOM™ Rayzor hit his head so hard on the ice he now thinks he plays for Halifax... in short it was a disaster of an exercise and practice was cancelled for the rest of the day. It seemed that this was failure beyond comprehension OR WAS IT? That practice was on December 5th. The Marlins have gone on to win ever single game since... with an incredible 10-0 record and scoring 59 goals.. for math people... that's an average of about 6 goals per game!! The media have turned their attention to GM IR... was this a brilliant move by a brilliant GM? Was it a ridiculous move by a ridiculous man? Was it a brilliant move by a ridiculous man? Or was it a ridiculous move by a brilliant man? So many possible combinations.. and we only used 2 adjectives, so we asked Phil the Rock Johnson about it: "It was all me. I started putting TPE into Leadership." Okay then.

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Happy Merry!

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1. We’re 24 points ahead of Houston, the 9th place and first team out of the playoff hunt as of this writing. With what looks like a smoother ride to make the playoff we can begin to experiment a bit to gear up for a postseason run. What line pairs would you like to see in these last few weeks of the season? Who would you like to play with on a line? We're on a seven game winning streak! This is incredible. I say don't touch a thing and ride this pony to win city, bitch! 2. We’ve been struggling against teams higher in the league like Saskatoon, Philadelphia, and of course Mexico City. What do you think the strategy could be to make us more competitive with the top teams in the league? Let Johnson at them and have them scared to step out onto the ice. I know he hasn't been hitting as promised but that's just because he only has to glare at a player before they lose the puck. I don't get the credit for the turnover but we all know why they suddenly turn it over... 3. Assuming the standings remain relatively the same, how comfortable are you with a first-round matchup with Miami? We got this. I think we are improving at the quickest rate in the league and with the VHL SANTA running around I think that will only play to our advantage. The most active get rewarded the most. As a team we shouldn't struggle against the likes of Miami, but if we keep this up we'll be facing an even weaker opponent. 4. A lot of interesting builds in the VHLM. What do you feel the most underrated stat is in a player’s build and why? It's two-fold, and it's league-wide. HITS vs. HIT TAKEN. a successful HIT results in the chance of a takeaway, a HIT TAKEN results in the chance of a giveaway. When teams and players look at the boulet they only look at points and hits. I was outraged and still am that some of my players have had the BIGGEST HITS: HITS TAKEN ratios in the history of the league and it's been overlooked. PLease don't make be rant on. 5. Your teammate Kaberle has been on fire with a mountain of content the last few weeks. Do you feel he should dial it back a bit to avoid burning himself out or is the strategy of full investment worth it in the long haul? [@fromtheinside] go ahead and comment on what the idea behind the mass of content is and how you’re managing it. @fromtheinsideas long as you know your own limits, keep this shit up! Back in my hayday I invest so many hours per week in the league and all because I enjoyed doing it immensely. I never had burnout.. just loss of interest after 40 seasons. But I'm back and let's try to keep you invested! 6. Who is our lockeroom MVP for the midway point of the regular season? Me... lol no. Probably Prout. @Prout He's a beast, a great guy, and a good time. But in the cheesy-ness of this colour, every single one of us are essential to the dynamic in the LR. We all are components of this well oiled machine and without one of us, we wouldn't be the same.

Rock Bottom #6 Welcome to the Jungle!! I'm your host, Phil Knight. Today we: - I FUCKED UP THE AUDIO FADE OUT AT THE BEGINNING - VHL SANTA'S COMING TO TOWN, BITCHES! @VHL Santa - VHL/M UPDATES - I WILL ACTUALLY BE A GOOD PICK @VHLGMs Enjoy this edition! KnightTime Podcast Questions Thread Songs: Mr. Winter - The Maine This is a division of KnightTime Radio. Run Time: 17.34 minutes

Need to get in on these tickets!

Jumamji Ambassador? @Ledge_and_Dairy

Transaction ID: 20455668230887745 Claimed This Week 5 TPE Uncapped Doubles Week $1M Player Store

$10 donation to FOOD BANKS CANADA through @sterling, the beautiful bastard Transaction ID: 20455663840512260 Thanks VHL Confirmed. -sterling P.S. not so bad, are you Phillip?

Merry happy everyone!!

Great thoughts!

Recreate soon!