Motzaburger

make student scholarships for VHL members

9 hours ago, rory said:

Thank god Motza is still around to be the voice of reason

"Your god can't save you, but I can."

                                         - MacGruber

                                         - Motzaburger

Theme week gonna be VHL instagram for dummies  

hmmm i swear i did this too, a 0 payout?

On 10/26/2023 at 3:27 PM, dylanjj37 said:

Las Vegas Press Conference

 

1. How are you preparing for the upcoming season?

2. What would you like/expect your new AGM to do this season?

3. If you weren't a hockey player, what would you be and why?

4. If you could have one area of the Juan Ceson Resort (where our arena, the Juan Ceson Arena, is based) named after you, what would you like it to be and what it be called? (e.g. Shindogs the hotdog restaurant named after our dear former GM Shindigs)

5. What is your favourite NHL team and why is it not the Penguins?

6. What kind of questions would like to be asked in a future press conference?

1. I DO NOT NEED TO PREPARE HENCE THE SEASON HAS BEGUN AND JH DEWBERRY KAHLIN IS COOKING UP A STORM ON AND OFF THE ICE - EVEN THOUGHT I JUST GOT TRADED. 

2. WE WANT SOME MORE PRESS CONFERENCES AND SOME FUN POSTS IDK. CHEF DEWBERRY KNOWS NOT WHAT THE AGM SHOULD BE DOING, HE IS A MERE PLAYER MORTAL IN THIS SIMULATION

3. CHEF DEWBERRY WOULD BE A CHEF BECAUSE THATS WHAT HE IS. HE COOKS, HE TOASTS, HE FEASTS, AND HE DINES. HE IS A GOD IN THE CULINARY WOLRD AND ALL SHALL BOW DOWN. 

4. OBVIOUSLY SINCE DEWEBERRY KAHLIN IS A MICHELIN CHEF HE WOULD HAVE A FINE DINING EXPERIENCE ON THE RESORT CALLED "ROLLING THE DICE" WHERE PEOPLE WOULD ROLL THE DICE AND GET THE FOOD BASED OFF NUMBER COMBINATIONS. YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU GONNA GET. 

5. JH DEWBERRY KAHLIN FAVORITE TEAM IS ANIMALS HE HAS TASTED AND COOKED WITH. MOSTLY CATS, SUCH AS THE PREDATORS AND PANTHERS. HE LIKES TO EAT CATS SOMETIMES AS A CULINARY ADEVENTURE. 

6. JUST ASKING THEM SILLY AND GOOD QUESTIONS SO CHEF DEWEBERRY KAHLIN CAN COOK UP A STORM AND GIVE YOU THE CONTENT YOU NEED TO SURVUVE YOUR GM AND AGM JOBS. 

Same old problems, same discussions, same old solutions - this hockey experience fundamentally hasn't changed, but something's gotta give.

Look at the keeners around trying to make improvements to the site, getting shut down left, right, and center (this hasn't changed either - I once tried so hard and only got so far, but in the end, it didn't even matter).

Listen to the members, especially those who want to make a difference. These are the most engaged, informed, and caring members. Take risks, make changes, adapt, improve, repeat. And make this experience engaging again, don't try make people be engaged in the VHL (that comes with the former). 

This place will be long dead before we know it if overhauls don't start happening  

Claim week 3/4

On 11/7/2023 at 10:59 AM, Jonny said:

          Week ending November 11 2023

                Answer all 6 for 2 tpe!

 

1. Are you happy with how you player has done this season?

2. Do you think we are going to make the playoffs this season?

3. If you could have any breakfast in the world what would you have?

4. Who are you most surprised by this season?

5. Tell me your favorite joke

6. What is your favorite NHL team 

1. He's balling for a VHLM rookie. Point per game and only going up from here. About to explode. 

2. No, but next year. Maybe we make some crazy trades or sneak in, but looks bleek now. 

3. A good french toast or a waffle is nice, maybe eggs benny, or a classic eggs/bacon. But cereal hits home. 

4. I am most surprised by JH DK this year  he's so so good a cooking and so so good at hockey. Gordon Ramsey on and off the ice, basically. 

5. I ordered a chicken and egg online. I'll let you know what comes first. 

6. CANUCKS DESTROYING EVERYONE AND ITS NOT EVEN CLOSE 

Claim week 2/4

I am understanding my player is equivalen to Bedard

2 hours ago, Spartan said:

I also happen to be REALLY nice and productive this season and did some cost checks for folks who had already submitted.

 

@Ahma - 43

@Motzaburger - 56 (There's a link in the form description that shows you player costs. And a fun little tool that helps you put together a roster based on costs. Keep it under $42)

@npuBeT - 44

@dstevensonjr - 43

 

If you guys need clarification, shoot me a DM on Discord or Forums and I can give you the cost breakdowns and how you went over.

oops lol resubmitted a new entry

Now & Then - Beatles

Back just in time to cook in Miami

i don't understand, but i tried

NICE

just keep skipping me lol i don't check enough or knwo any players

On 9/27/2023 at 11:39 PM, Tetricide said:

Week ending 1 October, 2023

Answer all 6 to claim 2 TPE!

 

1. What's up, Marauders?! The season has finally ended, and we're officially heading into playoffs! I know we had a really rocky ending and the GM had been pulling his non-existent hair out of his head trying to figure out how to break through the top teams... How is your player feeling going into their playoffs?

 

2. Compared to when your player started, how do you feel they have been performing?

 

3. Our backup goalie Giorgiy Costanzov @Mongoose87 recorded their first shutout game in their first starting game! Possible future hall of famer goalie in our hands?

 

4. What do you think our captain Oden Bell eats for breakfast?

 

5. Who is your favorite underrated player in the NHL?

 

6. Are you in any fantasy leagues?

1. My player is feeling good. The season hasn't even started and J.H. Dewberry Kahlin damn well knows MIami is playoff bound. Ain't no quesiton about it. He will dominate. 

2. Considering 0 games, he is performing well. Those stat lines speak for themselves. But wait, they will get filled out so much that he will become a HOFer in no time. By the time his VHL tenure ends maybe. 

3. Idk, could be. Could be all luck. JH Dewberry Kahlin is a shoe-in though. He is a master chef and hockey player. What esle could go wrong?

4. He probably eat toast and eggs. But if he had a chef on his team, like JH Dewberry Kalhin, he could have been wating like a king. Eggs benny, salmon tartare, so many options. 

5. JH Deberry Kahlin's favorite player is Phil Kessel. Same body shape, and same passion for food. Phil's is for hot dogs. JH's is for actual high class cuiisne though. 

6. Fantasy football, always. Its going ok. I plan to win like every year. Or at least get my money back for being top of the league!

Welcome to Miami (Bienvido a Miami) Dewberry Kahlin

Drafted by the Miami Marauders in the VHLM 
 

When the announcement came that Jeffrey Howard Dewberry Kalin, known to many as J.H. Dewberry Kalin, had been drafted by the Miami Marauders in the Victory Hockey League Minor (VHLM), it marked a moment of triumph and validation for the chef-turned-hockey player. The Miami Marauders, a team renowned for their keen eye in spotting emerging talents, had seen something extraordinary in Dewberry Kalin. The draft was not just a moment in his journey but a recognition of his relentless dedication to mastering a new craft. The culinary artist who had once dazzled palates was now poised to dazzle on the ice. Dewberry Kalin's draft into the Miami Marauders was the culmination of tireless hours of training, unwavering determination, and a burning passion for the game. It was the perfect union of his culinary creativity and his newfound hockey prowess. While skeptics may have questioned the fusion of these two worlds, the draft was a statement of faith in his ability to seamlessly bridge the gap. The Miami Marauders saw not just a hockey player but a multi-talented athlete ready to leave an indelible mark on the ice. 
 

The draft, held in the heart of Miami, was an electrifying event. It was an evening when the city's sports enthusiasts gathered to welcome new talent into their midst. Dewberry Kalin stood on the stage, his heart pounding, as he donned the Miami Marauders jersey for the first time. The roaring applause of the fans was not just a symbol of support; it was a promise that he was now a part of Miami's vibrant sports community. As he stepped off the stage, Dewberry Kalin felt a rush of emotions. The realization that he had been drafted into a professional hockey team, especially one with the reputation of the Miami Marauders, was a dream come true. It was a moment that validated his decision to pursue his love for hockey and proved that with dedication and unwavering passion, one could achieve even the most unlikely dreams. The draft itself was a display of the Miami Marauders' commitment to nurturing talent. The team's management had clearly recognized Dewberry Kalin's potential, and the city's hockey fans were now eagerly anticipating the upcoming season, eager to see how the chef-turned-hockey player would perform on the ice.
 

Moment of Frustration: 16th Overall
 

Dewberry Kalin's journey from the world of culinary arts to the Miami Marauders in the VHLM was undeniably a remarkable one. However, as the days went by after the VHLM draft, a nagging sense of frustration began to simmer within him. He had been drafted 16th overall, a respectable position by any measure, but for Dewberry Kalin, it wasn't enough. He believed he deserved a place in the top 10, and that belief fueled a burning determination to prove himself.
The chef-turned-hockey player had always set high standards for himself, whether in the kitchen or in preparation for the upcoming season. He was no stranger to the pressures of perfection, having created culinary masterpieces that garnered praise and acclaim. However, the realization that the hockey season had not yet started meant he had to channel his determination and ambition into preparation, both mentally and physically. Dewberry Kalin's frustration stemmed from a combination of his self-belief and a deep competitive spirit. He was used to being a trailblazer in the culinary world, crafting dishes that surprised and delighted even the most discerning palates. However, the transition to hockey had exposed him to a fresh wave of competition, and he was ready to demonstrate that he was more than just a mid-first-round pick. While he understood that the VHLM draft was a culmination of scouting reports, evaluations, and team strategies, he couldn't help but wonder if some had underestimated him. He had honed his skills on the ice with a singular focus, mirroring the dedication that had earned him recognition as a culinary innovator. His mid-first-round draft position was a source of motivation, igniting a desire to prove that he belonged in the upper echelons of VHLM talent.
 

Turning Frustration into Fuel
 

Dewberry Kalin was not one to wallow in frustration; instead, he harnessed it as a source of motivation. He was determined to use his mid-first-round draft selection as a stepping stone to propel himself to the top of his game. This meant intensifying his training regimen, focusing on areas of improvement, and seeking guidance from experienced players and coaches.
 

His commitment to excellence was unwavering, whether it was in perfecting a signature dish or mastering a particular hockey skill. Dewberry Kalin had a reputation for his unyielding work ethic, and he knew that the road to success, whether in the culinary world or the world of hockey, was paved with tireless effort. Dewberry Kalin's teammates and coaches noticed his unwavering determination and the fire that burned within him. They saw a player who was not content with merely being a part of the team but one who aspired to lead, to set an example of what relentless pursuit of excellence could achieve. His mid-first-round draft selection was no longer a source of frustration but a catalyst for his growth as a hockey player and a testament to his resilience.
 

Proving Himself on the Ice
 

As the season approached, Dewberry Kalin's on-ice performance began to reflect his determination. He displayed an exceptional work rate in practice, demonstrating a willingness to go the extra mile every practice. His skating improved, his puck-handling skills became more refined, and his understanding of the game deepened. He sought to be a versatile player, one who could contribute in various facets of the game. The chef-turned-hockey player's approach mirrored his culinary style. Just as he had once crafted intricate dishes with precision, he now approached each training session with a strategic mindset. He was not content with simply preparing; he aimed to craft a successful hockey season with the same artistry that had made him a renowned chef. With every practice, Dewberry Kalin's impact on the Miami Marauders became increasingly evident. He showcased his culinary creativity in his style of play, with unexpected passes, innovative plays, and an uncanny ability to think several steps ahead. It was as if the kitchen had merged with the ice, and the result was a hockey player whose unique approach set him apart.
 

Recognition and Redemption
 

Dewberry Kalin's relentless pursuit of excellence did not go unnoticed. As the pre-season looms, he began to gain recognition for his exceptional contributions to the Miami Marauders. His teammates and coaches spoke highly of his dedication, work ethic, and the impact he had on the team's performance. His journey from the 16th overall draft pick to a standout player on the team will serve as an inspiring narrative within the VHLM. It is a story of redemption, a reminder that draft position did not define a player's potential. Dewberry Kalin had transformed frustration into fuel, using his mid-first-round draft selection as a catalyst for his growth and success. The chef-turned-hockey player had evolved into a fan favorite, earning the admiration of Miami Marauders supporters who appreciated his commitment and unique style of play. His mid-first-round draft selection, once a source of frustration, had become a badge of honor, a testament to his ability to overcome challenges and reach new heights.
 

Excitement for the Upcoming Season
 

As Dewberry Kalin looked ahead to the upcoming season with the Miami Marauders, his excitement was palpable. The opportunity to showcase his unique blend of culinary finesse and hockey skills was a prospect he relished. The thrill of competition, the camaraderie of the locker room, and the chance to don the Miami Marauders' jersey filled him with a sense of purpose and exhilaration. The transition from the culinary world to professional hockey was no small feat, but Dewberry Kalin's commitment to excellence was unwavering. He knew that his special blend of attributes, honed in the kitchens and on the rinks, was not just an oddity but a competitive advantage. The upcoming season represented a chance to prove that his background as a chef could coexist harmoniously with his role as a hockey player. Dewberry Kalin's preparation for the season was rigorous, mirroring the dedication he once poured into perfecting complex dishes. Every training session, every practice, was an opportunity to refine his skills, whether it was crafting the perfect sauce or perfecting a slapshot. He was poised to enter the season not just as an athlete but as a culinary artist on the ice, ready to redefine the boundaries of possibility.
 

The Miami Marauders' training camp buzzed with energy as Dewberry Kalin and his teammates geared up for the season. The camaraderie in the locker room was a source of motivation and inspiration. Dewberry Kalin found himself not just welcomed but embraced as an integral part of the team. The upcoming season was not just a personal journey for Dewberry Kalin; it was a shared mission with his teammates. The Miami Marauders, a team with a rich history and passionate fan base, were looking to make their mark in the VHLM, and Dewberry Kalin was determined to be a driving force in their pursuit of excellence.
 

A Special Dish for Miami 

In the spirit of embracing his new hockey home, Dewberry Kalin decided to craft a special dish that would pay tribute to Miami's vibrant culture and flavors. The dish, a fusion of culinary creativity and the vibrancy of Miami, was a testament to his ability to blend his two worlds seamlessly. The dish, aptly named "Miami Fusion," was a medley of bold flavors that showcased his culinary artistry. It combined elements of Caribbean, Latin, and American cuisine, reflecting the rich and diverse cultural tapestry of the city. From succulent marinated meats to zesty tropical salsas, "Miami Fusion" embodied the city's spirit, where tradition met innovation. "Miami Fusion" quickly gained attention, not only for its exquisite taste but also for its symbolic value. It was a culinary bridge that connected the essence of Miami with Dewberry Kalin's passion for both food and hockey. The dish became a favorite among Miami Marauders fans, who could savor the taste of victory and creativity with every bite. Dewberry Kalin's commitment to infusing his culinary talents into his life on and off the ice extended to charity events. He used "Miami Fusion" as a centerpiece for fundraising events that supported local charities, blending his love for the city and its people with his desire to make a positive impact.
 

Plans to Open a Miami Restaurant
 

Beyond the rink, Dewberry Kalin had ambitious plans that extended to the heart of Miami itself. He envisioned opening a restaurant in the vibrant city, a place where his culinary artistry would continue to thrive. The restaurant would be a tribute to Miami's rich culinary traditions, with a modern twist that reflected his innovative approach to food. Dewberry Kalin's vision for the Miami restaurant included a menu that celebrated the city's diverse flavors and ingredients. He aimed to create a space that felt both familiar and exciting, where Miamians and visitors alike could savor the fusion of culinary traditions from around the world. The restaurant would not just be a testament to his culinary passion but a representation of his commitment to Miami and its culture. It would be a place where food and sports, two of his greatest passions, could come together in perfect harmony. As he shared his plans for the restaurant with the Miami Marauders and their fans, the enthusiasm was palpable. Miami was not just a city where Dewberry Kalin played hockey; it was a city he had come to call home, and he was eager to give back to the community that had embraced him. Dewberry Kalin's restaurant venture would not just be a place to savor extraordinary dishes; it would also be a venue for community engagement, supporting local initiatives, and celebrating the city's diverse culinary traditions.
 

Conclusion
 

In him, Miami found not just a chef and a hockey player, but a force of inspiration. Dewberry Kalin's commitment to his dual passions was a testament to the boundless nature of human potential. As the season approached, his anticipation grew, not just for the games on the ice but for the moments where the city's culinary enthusiasts and sports fans would come together to celebrate both his extraordinary journey and his culinary creations. Dewberry Kalin had become a symbol of unity, a living testament to the idea that passion knows no boundaries and that Miami was in for a season filled with flavor, excitement, and, most importantly, victory.

Total word count: 2098

yeah me,  but someone help me pick players

Breifly before the interview, J.H. Dewberry Kahlin was caugh smoking a bowl of meth in his kitchen (where he spends most of the time off the ice). Dewberry Kahlin is known for being a chef, but not for being a meth addict. It will be interesitng to see how his first VHLM season plays out....

Do you have a specific team you would like to play for? Are you playing for that team now?
While every team has its appeal, I'm focused on giving my best for the Toronto Thunderbirds, the team that welcomed me into the VHLM. I'm not only playing for them now but also committed to contributing to their success.

Everyone has a pre-game ritual. What is yours?
Before each game, I have a moment of reflection where I visualize success and remember the journey that brought me to this point. Then, I enjoy a small pre-game meal with high-quality carbs and protein to fuel my performance.

Is there any music you listen to to pump you up for a game? Do you have a playlist?
Absolutely! My go-to playlist is a mix of high-energy rock and motivational tracks. It helps get me in the zone and fuels my adrenaline before hitting the ice.

If there was any other sport you could play, what would it be?
If I weren't pursuing a career in hockey, I'd likely be drawn to a sport that involves a similar blend of precision, teamwork, and physicality. Perhaps golf or soccer, as both require strategy and finesse in their own ways.

What's the worst hockey-related injury your player has endured?
In the past, I experienced a tough injury—a severe ankle sprain that kept me out of the game for an extended period. It was a challenging setback, but it taught me the value of resilience and the importance of proper recovery and rehabilitation in sports.