DoktorFunk

I’m going to talk about this week a subject that had been on my mind was my time as a General Manager and my current role as an Assistant General Manager. I don’t think I really had much of an appreciation for how much work goes into it. When I started in the league, Gustav only had about one more seasons worth of experience than me, and yet he was trusted to run an entire VHLM team. That must have been crazy for him, especially considering the success he had in retaining people. The Gustav Effect, indeed. What made season 66 and 67 such a good year? What exactly encouraged so many of us to stick around, because it clearly wasn’t just people from Mississauga. Hell, most of Seattle was from one of those seasons, and we didn’t all start on the same VHLM team. So really, since the job of a VHLM GM is to help new players through their orientation and smooth their transition into the VHL proper, how can we crystallize this into a true strategy and make it easier for all VHLM GMs to do across the board? Time and time again, we hear from players that were successfully retained that the reason they stuck around was the locker room. Sure, success in a season makes people more interested in the game and gets them more involved, but a thriving community is the key to making this site a more engaging thing and not a “check on it every once in a while” sort of thing. So, questions: What makes a good locker room? Are the qualities represented by a good locker room inherent to a General Manager’s success in the VHLM? How can we distill this philosophy to make it easier for everyone? Now then, what makes a good locker room? I would do research for this, but I’d really rather have everyone sound off in the comments. I feel like, for a good locker room to exist, you need to have the right people engaged and involved. The General Manager and Assistant General Manager need to be engaged and active, willing to help new players and also just to be present and willing to chat with the players about anything. Also, they need to be careful about who they select to be involved. I know in Seattle we had a toxic personality in our first year together, and it caused everyone a lot of stress. It was much better once that person left. But, I’m not endorsing every locker room purge what they perceive to be toxic players, because a player that is toxic in one locker room might be a perfect fit in another. I guess, in those instances, a trade wouldn’t be a bad idea. Next, Discord seems to be the generally accepted format for a locker room, so what makes a good Discord server? I’ve been in quite a few, and some of them tend to be overwhelming with options and places to chat or post. Speaking from a management perspective, it can be a ton of work and stress going through each and every channel to make sure that someone’s question gets answered in a timely manner. In a way, I actually think Berocka having a North American AGM is perfect, because the differences in timing make it so that someone in management is always online to help while the other is sleeping. But, anyway, organization and precision of the Discord server, I think, is very important. I’m sure there are other factors, but these are the only ones that I can think of. Second, are the qualities represented by a good locker room inherent to a General Manager’s success in the VHLM? Well, that depends on what you define as “success” in the VHLM. I always viewed the VHLM’s goal as retention. We want players to stick around and become invested. The answer to this question, then, is yes, for a number of reasons. As listed above, an organized, concise, attentive locker room makes players better and more invested in the game and keeps them coming back. Plus, having a full, high-quality locker room, makes management’s job easier. Players and management helping players is much better than just management helping players. I don’t think winning the Founder’s Cup is required to be a successful GM in the VHLM, because although it can make the new players excited by having a taste of success, the real goal of the game is to get to the VHL, and nobody ends their careers with a Founder’s Cup only and calls it a successful time. Third, how can we crystallize this and make it easier to replicate? I’m not sure, honestly, and I’m sure there are smarter people than me that can put the pieces together.. A lot of locker rooms allow alumni to stick around in them, which is a good thing, because it keeps people who can help constantly there. However, having too many alumni could be a bad thing, because the chat can become deeply flooded by old inside jokes and things that would be inaccessible to new players. There has to be a good balance. Maybe set a limit on how many years removed an alumnus may stick around after graduating would be a good solution. My point is, I guess, that having a consistent strategy across the whole league can really improve a lot and allow the league to expand even more. Then we can have more teams and more personality, more innovation, fresh eyes on the site that can help us improve it overall! But, none of that will happen if players immediately become disinterested in the game because of a poorly run VHLM. Not calling anyone out at all here. In fact, this is more a reinforcement of my own strategy and thoughts as far as what I’d like to accomplish as an AGM. It’s a complicated task, because everyone is going to be really shy the first time that they start on here. No one likes being outside of their comfort zone, and no one likes appearing stupid, so whatever we can do to help them become more successful and start having fun at this game, we should do. 1044 Words, claiming for two weeks

Goes without saying, family comes first. You always have a home here, even if you just wanna get on and be goofy with us. We're here for you and we love you, dude.

F- Scott Greene

Hi there @BrandonP93! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you a good amount of ice time. We're definitely looking for new stars to make a splash and help us win the cup. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. I can guarantee you'll have fun, because this is the team I started with, too! Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

Hi there @Andrew Essen! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you ice time each game, on one of our lines. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. I can guarantee you'll have a ton of fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

Hi there @GoadenGoalie35! Cool name for a winger! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you plenty of ice time each game. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

Hi there @Wallace! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you plenty of ice time each game. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

The Mississauga Hounds have launched an outreach campaign with the local SPCA in order to attract more people to adopt dogs. The new "Hounds in the House" program has been approved by management and seeks to find a new home for all of the stray dogs in the Mississauga area. Assistant General Manager Scott Greene was a big proponent of the program. "Dogs are great, and I love them," says Greene. "Our General Manager, Berocka, wanted to sacrifice them as soon as he took over the team. Probably something he carried over from Halifax. But I told him no. These dogs need a good home. I couldn't stop him from taking four of the dogs home, though. I really hope they're okay." Whatever dark magic Berocka is working with those dogs remains to be seen, but for now, the stray dogs of Mississauga can know that they have strong and staunch allies on the Hounds.

Claim dubz

Seattle, Washington Scott Greene of the Seattle Bears has been promoted to be the Assistant General Manager of the Mississauga Hounds. We caught up with Greene in his Seattle apartment to get some of his thoughts on helping run the team so far, the brief interregnum period, his short tenure as General Manager before being moved back down to AGM, and whether or not he would like to be a full General Manager in the future. Interviewer: Good morning Scott! How's it going? Scott Greene: Really well! Thanks for coming by! I: Thanks for having us. So, let's get right to it. You recently got promoted to be the Assistant General Manager of the Mississauga Hounds. Does it mean a lot to you to return to your minor league team and how have you enjoyed it so far? SG: It's been wonderful. I've always stayed in very close contact with the players in Mississauga, whether it's just making new friends or helping some of the young guys to get their feet under them and develop. It's a wonderful thing to do. So, yes. Of course it's been a pleasure to actually become part of the management team there. Working for Jerry Garcia has been a treat and now it's exciting to be working with my friend Berocka Sundqvist. I: How did you feel when you were in charge of the team for that few hours while the management was being changed? SG: *laughs* I was nervous, to be honest. That being said, I think it was okay. I feel like I could've done better, but the team survived and most people seem happy, so it could've been worse. There was a lot of uncertainty for what would happen when Jerry left. He was and kind of always will be the heart of that team. I'm just glad we made it through to the other side. I: So you weren't super happy with your eight hour performance as General Manager? SG: *chuckles* No, not really. It was kind of shocking. But it was very exciting. I: So you wouldn't like to be a General Manager in the future? SG: Oh I didn't say that. I'd love to be. I think it's a ton of fun to help grow the league and community. I threw my hat in the ring for General Manager of the Halifax 21st. My father was a Satanist, so I think I'd fit in fine. My biggest strengths would be organizing lines and finding chemistry with the players. That would be my favorite part. Because of my obligations to Seattle, I'd love to have a competent Assistant that could help run that team, and I'd love to make it worth their while to do so. I: Anything else you'd like to say before we wrap this up? SG: Keep an eye on Mississauga this season. I think Berocka is going to do amazing things. Also, Go Bears and Go Hounds! We Roar, We Score! With the season coming up, we will see if Greene's words end up being true. 511 Words

Let's get some more press conference questions, peepz! You can answer any three of these questions for 1 TPE or any 6 of these questions for 2 TPE. If you don't answer them this week, I WILL find you. You don't want that! 1. What's your earliest memory? 2. What's your proudest moment? 3. Do you have any bad habits? 4. How do you feel about our boy @Berocka becoming our new benevolent overlord? 5. How would you like to see Berocka change the team up, if at all? 6. Do you miss @GustavMattias? @Adil @GlowyGoat @AnthonyOuellet @goldenglutes @BigIrish @Giles Rigel @Apoc_Chaos @Thunder70 @Hawkins309 @Battlepopcorn @aleks

D - Guy LeGrande F - John Frostbeard @McWolf

Hi there @nicojaller! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you plenty of ice time! We're looking for new stars to make an impact. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

I mean, I do have experience being a GM for 8 hours. I'll apply

Well, now we have to! ?

Hi there @NJDevils4Life! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. I cannot stress this enough: we need defenseman. Signing with us will get you maximum ice time each game, on one of our top two defensive pairs. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. We aren't going to win the cup this season, but I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

@GustavMattias

Hi there! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you as much ice time as we can. We are in a bit of a rebuilding season, so we will be looking for people who are ready to make a name for themselves! You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. We probably aren't going to win the cup this season, but I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

D- Jerry Garcia G - Kallis Kriketers @McWolf

Hi there, D-Note! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you maximum ice time each game, on one of our top two forward lines. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. We aren't going to win the cup this season, but I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

Hi there, ahmantti! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you maximum ice time each game, on one of our top two forward lines. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. We aren't going to win the cup this season, but I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

Hi there! Welcome to the VHL! I'm DoktorFunk, AGM of the Mississauga Hounds, and I'd like to offer you a spot on our roster. Signing with us will get you maximum ice time each game, on one of our top two forward lines. You'll also be in one of the VHLM's best and most supportive communities, full of active people who are there to help you with anything you need and show you a fun time in general. We aren't going to win the cup this season, but I can guarantee you'll have fun. Anyway, if this sounds good to you, feel free to quote my offer and say "accepted" to join the Hounds. Best of luck this season, and feel free to reach out to me with any questions, no matter who you sign with. -DFunk

C-Ryan Kastelic

Richmond, VA Scott Greene of the Seattle Bears had returned home following Seattle's victory in the Continental Cup Finals. The two-time champion had decided to visit with his family and take it easy this off season, believing that rest and relaxation is the key to improvement. "I think my game will improve if I just relax this time," says Greene. "Last season, we were wild. We got really drunk and partied really hard, and we managed to push past it and repeat with a cup victory. But, this time, I'm going to relax and savor the victory. My name is on the cup twice! I never dreamed that would happen." Greene returns to Seattle in two weeks to rejoin the Bears in their next season. The Bears show no signs of slowing down, and all signs point to their intent to go for another Continental Cup run. Hopefully, Greene's strategy pays off.

Hey Bob Helminen! My name is DoktorFunk. I'm the Assistant General Manager of the Mississauga Hounds! I just wanted to welcome you to the league and let you know that I'd be happy to help you out any way that I can. I know this site can be overwhelming to new members, so please don't hesitate to reach out! Our team, Mississauga, is in a good place! We just advanced to the finals of the Founders Cup, and are looking for new talents such as yourself to make a big splash! If you're interested, quote my post and say "Accepted!" Either way, welcome, and we'll be looking forward to see what your future holds here!