Thunder

Transaction ID: 3VX65616YU927822C 5 uncapped TPE Doubles Week $1 mil player store

My bad

Another week has passed and that means another media spot to do. Last week I tried to avoid a media spot, only to spend money on a graphic app and about 6 hours of failure, to resort back to writing. And a podcast is definitely out of the question, the way I ramble on…. I suppose, this just gives @JCarson another option for review, after reading his .com article last week! Coming up with an idea this week was actually quite easy. It started out digging into stats on Logan Ninefingers, @Scurvy, and Riley Martin, @Smarch, and then the lightbulb in my mushy brain turned on, and I have come up with something I can put on paper. Hopefully, this will get me a couple weeks of 6 TPE in the process. I am choosing one player from each team to give a mention to that player’s contribution to the team. During this research I discovered that over the years every team has someone quite spectacular. That being said, my disclaimer is that if you were not picked over one of your teammates, it has absolutely nothing with your player’s ability. I’m just choosing as I write. Here goes! Calgary Wranglers Phil Strasmore - @Phil Phil Strasmore played 648 regular season games with Calgary. What caught my eye to select Strasmore wasnt his goals or assists, but the fact that he was a beast! Phil Strasmore holds the Calgary Wranglers’ records for PIMS, hits and shots blocked, with 1780, 2084, and 1295 respectively. Chicago Phoenix Bo Johansson - @Shindigs Bo Johannson’s recent induction into the hall of fame made it easy for me to choose him when looking at the Phoenix team. Not only because BoJo was an incredible player, but more so is that Shindigs was one of my early mentors who helped me figure things out. It made it nice because at the time I was bugging @Spartan daily, and with Shindigs in the mix at least I could give Spartan a break now and then. Unfortunately, Shindigs made an abrupt departure from the VHL, and has been missed ever since. Back to BoJo’s team stats, he leads Chicago in all time shots blocked, at 1230, and is ranked #3 in all time points. I think that if Johansson had one more season with Calgary, he would have overtaken the current points leader, Scotty Sundin. DC Dragons Groovy Dood - @bigAL This is actually a pretty good selection, considering Groovy Dood holds records in almost every category for the DC Dragons. Dood shares the lead in games played with two other players, and leads the team in goals with 313 and assists with 387. Dood has 700 points, which is also the lead. Dood’s ± of +101 is also on top. I’m not done! Dood holds the record for PIMS, hits, and shots, with 895, 2191, and 3381 respectively. One might ask, “what, you couldn’t lead in shots blocked and game winning goals too?” HC Davos Dynamo David Jokinen - @Ahma There were several players I could have chosen from HC Davos. I thought of choosing Pete Mitchell, @Crstats23, Mason Jones, @Masu Chan , both of these players fire up my memory when I hear their names as they played a big part in Jake Thunder’s success. And then of course I almost selected Taavetti Jokinen, just so I could talk trash about the rivalry between Taavetti and Bollos de Trueno, but Trueno can’t back up his big mouth because he’s too afraid to drop the gloves. In the end, I chose another Jokinen to mention because of Jokinen’s strong commitment to HC Davos, and Davos GM, @Alex, who’s built a dynasty, not a dynamo! David Jokinen holds the games played record for HC Davos, at 648, as well as the shots blocked record at 1513. David Jokinen was a dedicated HC Davos player who taught me the true meaning of “bleeding purple” as he is one like David Tavau and all the other Jokinen’s created by Ahma. If there is anyone who doubts that Ahma bleeds purple, all you need to do is listen to the ahmacast podcast at the end of season 89, and how excited someone reacted to winning the continental cup! How Alex can put up with this all these years is beyond my imagination!!! Helsinki Titans Tommy Sleeves - @dasboot This selection was a little tough as I initially liked Franchise Cornerstone because of the name, and the fact that Cornerstone holds the Helsinki record for goals, assists, points, and ±. Instead, I’ve chosen Tommy Sleeves, who was a well known tough guy feared by many. Tommy Sleeves played in 576 regular season games with the Titans, and he is the current leader of the team in PIMS, hits, and shots blocked. I am not going to look, but it wouldn’t surprise me if Tommy Sleeves is the Helsinki leaders in fights and fights won. Sleeves’ career with Helsinki netted 2018 PIMS, 2459 hits, and 1351 shots blocked. London United Molly the Cat - @JCarson Oh geez, if I had known that Molly the Cat was none other than JCarson before selecting the player, I probably would have tried to find another player to talk about. But, since it’s too late and I’ve already made my choice, I’m discussing Molly the Cat. Molly is tied for most games played with London, at 576. Molly the Cat is also the sniper for London, having scored 301 goals for the United. Molly the Cat could never get the Lady Byng trophy, as Molly was second in hits, with 1407. Molly is also the all time London leader with 3420 shots. Los Angeles Stars Pistil Stamen - @DMaximus This 1st round draft pick was a dominating player who holds the Los Angeles Stars record in most categories, including games played, goals, assists, points, and shots. After looking at Stamen and trying to find someone else, I kept coming back to the record breaking center. I even thought about giving Pierre Marc Bouchard, @Gaikoku-hito, some credit for being with the Stars, but he has yet to play a game for Los Angeles. And, after PMB goes toe to toe with Bollos de Trueno, Los Angeles GM, @InstantRockstarr may want to bench PMB. Back to Pistil. Pistil Stamen played 576 games for Los Angeles, scoring 272 goals, 372 assists, for 644 points. Pistil also shot on goal 3015 times. Obviously PMB won’t be able to overtake Pistil’s game record, nor is he likely to come close to beating any other record. Perhaps he could get the record for losing the most teeth during his time with Los Angeles! Malmo Nighthawks Viktor Jensen - @Advantage Here’s another one that caught me by surprise. I half expected a lot to choose from, but Viktor Jensen is the leader in a lot of categories for the Nighthawks. He’s played in 648 games, racked up 271 goals, 463 assists, and 734 total points. His ± is at a +230, he’s got 3250 shots on goal, and 48 game winning goals. It looks like it might be a while before any of these records get broken and Malmo has a new stats leader. Moscow Menace Maverick Goncalves - @leandrofg Here is a team that is loaded with stars and leaders. It took some reading to come up with a solution to choosing this name. Considering that at the top of the current all time Moscow stats list, there is Hard Markinson, @STZ, Duncan Idaho, @OrbitingDeath , and Jarmo Ruutu, @jRuutu, who each all time leaders for Moscow. Creating a player that blends Markinson’s passing talent and shots blocking, Duncan Idaho’s laser shooting and toughness, and Jarmo Ruutu’s complete player abilities, you come up with Maverick Goncalves. Goncalves is currently half way to the season games played, but is more than half way on goals, assists, and points, and his ± will be on top by the end of season 99. Maverick Goncalves is fast on his way to a hall of fame career and busting the Moscow records. New York Americans Conner Low I think its too soon to choose Guntis Gavilrovs, @Girts, I had to make a choice between Conner Low and Xin Xie Xiao, I am going with Conner Low, based on his leading the New York Americans in assists, points, and ±. Low and Xiao, but Low had 555 assists and 789 points. He also had a ± of +296. Low didnt have quite as many PIM’s as the New York PIM’s leader, Callum Gary Yannick Janser, but he was ahead of Xiao. Prague Phantoms John Jameson - @Frank It just occurred to me that Frank created John Jameson. I should have known better since Frank has said many times in the Wolves locker room that he has a weakness for Jameson whiskey. Well, he must have been drunk when John Jameson was smashing all the records for Prague Phantoms. The only record that Jameson doesn’t hold for the Phantoms is shots blocked. Perhaps he’s too pretty and likes all of his teeth. Regardless, John Jameson is clearly a name all Prague Phantoms players should know and try to imitate. Jameson played 576 games for the Phantoms. He scored 328 goals, had 433 assists, for 761 points and a ± of +262. Jameson had 1097 PIM’s (dont wanna hear complaints of the Wolves sinners) and 1821 hits. This beast also took 3622 shots and had 59 game winning goals. Jersey #19 is retired and the banner is hanging. What a player! Impressed. Riga Reign Fredinamjis Krigars - @hedgehog337 Fredinamjis Krigars is a hall of fame player from many seasons ago, and given his HOF status helped solidify why I chose to recognize Krigars as a Riga Reign star. In 504 games, Krigars had 332 goals and 738 points. Krigars also leads Riga with 3752 shots and 52 game winning goals. It’s unlikely that any of these records will be broken any time soon. Seattle Bears Hulk Hogan/Hulk Hogan 2 - @Hogan This choice is a comparison of two Seattle Bears stars, who happen to have the same pedigree. Both Hogans played 576 games for the Bears. Hulk 2 scored 205 goals, while daddy had 105 goals. Father Hulk leads Seattle with 444 assists while Jr has 379. Hulk 2 is ahead of Hulk in total points at 584 to 549, and Jr is a ± of +103 to +84 for Hulk. Senior Hulk has 1025 PIM’s, while Jr is at 472. The elder Hulk has 1212 hits and 984 shots blocked while the young boy is at 888 and 712 respectively. Hogan 2 has 2557 shots to Hulk’s 1270. And finally, Jr leads Sr in game winning goals, 39 to 22. Hulk Hogan is a Hall of Fame player, which sets him apart from Hulk Hogan 2. Toronto Legion Max Molholt The leading goal scorer and point scorer for the Toronto Legion is Max Molholt. In 576 games, he scored 406 goals and 868 points. He held the assist record until Bobby Bob overtook him in season 96. That record is waiting to be broken. Molholt leads Toronto in the ± category and shots category with a +269 and 4057 respectively. Vancouver Wolves Pierre Emile Bouchard - @Gaikoku-hito I cant choose Ninefingers over Martin, or vice versa, so I’m choosing PMB’s older brother, PEB. Maybe Frank will show some remorse for getting rid of my good buddy. PEB doesn’t lead any categories but he was a consistent player who holds some respectable standings in the rankings. PEB played 473 games with the Wolves before he got traded to Helsinki. Hmmm, a familiar theme I see! Perhaps had PEB stayed, he would hold some records. At any rate, he scored 115 goals, 348 assists, 463 points and a +70. PEB had 1069 shots blocked. Although he was never able to hold the shots record like Riley Martin currently holds, nor the game winning goals record that is currently held by Logan Ninefingers, PEB was still a force to be reckoned with and unlike PMB, PEB is not afraid to drop the gloves. Warsaw Predators Brian Payne - @Scurvy This hall of fame player deserves to be chosen in this media spot. Brian Payne was a tough guy and played only 432 games with the Predators, but he still holds a few records with the team. He’s got a ± of +138, two ahead of the other Warsaw superstar Zach Kissinger II. Brian Payne was a dirty player too, netting 1323 PIM’s in those 432 games. Payne wasnt afraid to get in the way, and he leads the Predators in shots blocked with 1034. Once again, I’m not going to look for the number of fights the angry Payne Train got into, but I’m sure it was quite a few, considering all he did was brag about all the fights he was getting into. 2128 words Claim 4 weeks

1. Vancouver made some minor moves early into the off season picking up young prospect Ronan Amnon @Breeze837 from D.C. Dragons for S101 VAN 2nd? What did you think of the trade and what was the first thing you said to Amnon when he joined the Locker room? I cant remember what i first said to Amnon, but it was probably warning him to watch out for Logan Ninefingers, because Ninefingers likes to hang out in the shower and watch players soap up. 2. Today marked the end of the world as far as fans might be concerned as fan favorite with golden locks of hair that looked like sunlight in the dark cold days of summer; Pierre Marc Bouchard @Gaikoku-hito (ha ha) was fired from a Cannon to conference rivals LA Stars? What did you think about the trade and are we finally happy to get rid of that bum? Explain …. I just found out about PMB getting the boot and I’m not very happy about that. The jealous salary cap makers decided to lower the cap just to screw with @Frank and @Gaikoku-hito so PMB, being the high quality guy that he is offered himself up to save Riley, Logan, and Bollos, and Soju. 3. Vancouver then continued to rebuild their roster quickly adding Mr. Wolf himself in Sunset Moth @McWolf for a weak S101 MOS 2nd? What does it mean having the Wolf man himself join the Wolve pack? Explain…. Blood is thicker than water. Mcwolf raises the bar and is a fan favorite. With the loss of PMB, Sunset Moth more than makes up for it to put Vancouver back on track for a Cup. 4. Last trade that felt like many as many more were discussed seen the team add Vanuza Kolesinska @chikn and Bryce Woodworth @SirRupertBarnes now completing the roster unless the finger of the GM is still itchy; Do you like this trade why or why not I’ve always liked @chikn just cuz of the name! And things are looking up having him on the team. As far as Bryce Woodworth, I just hope we can live up to his standards and perform as we should. 5. Has Vancouver Management done enough to keep the window of opportunity and committing a heinous crime against a now former teammate? Yes/No Explain…. I dont really know how to answer this question as I’m still a little bent out of shape on losing my buddy PMB. But, it won’t take long and I’ll be able to say who? 6. Can you tell that it has been a long day and I have been drinking a bit of good Whiskey? What would you do if you traded away from the best team in the VHL; the Vancouver Wolves? (No I am not drinking because I traded myself ) It’s business PMB. You sacrificed yourself for the good of the team. Now quit your whining and go to LA and when you face the Wolves, be ready to get your face smashed in by Riley Martin, only because Trueno is too afraid to drop the gloves. 7. Bonus Riddle: I can go all around the world but never leave my corner. What am I? I believe that is a sexual favor and you shouldn’t be putting it on a press conference.

I don’t know what happened to my graphic skills, but they suck more than a year ago. I think @Scurvy has the saying to describe me right now, “That boy dumb,” and he’s not talking about @ScottyP, he’s describing me when he says it. Over the weekend I decided to change it up and do a graphic for the media spot. I lost my photo shop app a while back and took some advice from Scurvy, and picked up Acorn. After about an hour or so on Saturday I decided to scratch the graphic with the intention of starting over on Sunday. Sunday came around and I spent some time finding just the right hockey photo. Things started out pretty good and I was doing one hell of a job on it. I had the color of the jersey good and added a layer for the logo on the front and skewed that ok to make it look good, although it wasn’t quite as good as warping it with my previous app. Regardless, I did some duplicating and managed to get the Vancouver logos on the shoulder too, all lined up and real looking. Oh, the graphic was going to be a Logan Ninefingers graphic. It took me a little bit with the shoulder logos. For some reason when I tried to move them I kept creating another box and I couldn’t figure out what the heck I was doing wrong. After a lot of “undos” I decided to move on so I added a layer with a nice glow and was doing good with that until I tried to make it off center. I finally got it to a point that was just OK, so I hit the opacity and made it look a little better. I had to watch a tutorial about quick masks and added one hoping to blur some edges and highlight Logan Ninefingers, but that didn’t pan out for shit. Once again, I have no clue what happened there and was getting a little frustrated, to say the least. Now I was over two hours into this effort, the dog was getting impatient, and I was tired of having my fat ass in the seat. I came to the conclusion that the graphic was fine as it was and all it needed to make it presentable was to add the signature. This is where everything fell apart. Normally I would do the signature with whatever font I chose and after getting it done, I would move it to where I wanted it to be, adjust the spacing, tilt, colors, and all that neat stuff. I never thought for the life of me that I was going to run into problems with the signature part of this graphic. The box wasn’t big enough to start with and “Logan Ninefingers” didn’t fit in the box. Nothing to worry about right? Well, I couldn’t stretch the box out to make it work. I had extra boxes, different color than what I chose, and “Logan Ninefingers” plastered across the graphic with different angles, different colors, and even opacity changes. It was actually quite impressive even though it was a jacked up graphic. And to make matters worse, I had no clue how this happened. Now comes the submission. I go to media spots and drag it into the spot and all I get is a stupid link. I couldn’t fix that so I shit canned it and went back to the graphic. I couldnt even find where it gets saved as a. .jpeg or .png, or anything. So I left it there and decided to write a media spots bitching about being a dumb shit who can’t even make a graphic. 624 words

Not randy?

Groovy baby!!

Doesn’t even deserve .1 just because??

You’re so right…. @ScottyP is shit. Although he’s got potential. I mean, just look at his work ethic. It can only go up. Right now he’s somewhere between P. White and Creature. WTF. Why’d we get rid of Mo?

The Miami Marauders have a new general manager to take charge of the team and bring them out of the cellar to make contenders out of them. @Scurvy, was promoted from AGM to the GM of the team and he is going to bring with him his hockey experience along with a true dedication to the VHL. Scurvy takes pride in the teams he has ever been on with his two players, HOF defender Brian Payne, and future HOF Logan Ninefingers. Scurvy has a tried and trued method of building his players and he can provide young players lucky enough to be selected to the Marauders with valuable guidance and unending support. Scurvy knows exactly what he is getting into and is looking to build a long term successful team while giving those wishing to make early jumps into the VHL the opportunity to max earn their TPE. Scurvy takes the VHLM seriously and will not be satisfied with a non-productive team. He is dealt with the cards he holds right now and expects to be well-rounded within the next two seasons, but he is hoping to show a dramatic improvement this coming up season. He does have an uphill battle considering that only two players on the current roster will remain on the team without being drafted and he is hoping to pick up a plethora of talented newcomers. Scurvy and his AGM, @minman, are busy looking for the right players to put together solid lines able to compete against some of the already well-established VHLM teams that consistently compete deep into the playoffs. Scurvy has been hard at work trying to maneuver some skilled trades to give him some established players as well as to give him some favorable opportunities in the upcoming draft. Scurvy may be new at the role of GM and he takes the new responsibilities in stride, but he has also surrounded himself with experienced general managers who have managed VHL teams for multiple seasons. Scurvy has taken his career of being associated with some well respected general managers and he will most definitely take something back with him from each of the general managers to help define his managerial skills. Scurvy has been talking to general managers in the background for several months as he seeks to make his mark in the VHLM. In addition, Scurvy has selected a well qualified AGM to help him bring the team up in the rankings and make the Marauders a well balanced team. Scurvy has mentioned some very good qualities in Minman and he has all the confidence in the world with Minman. Minman complements the hockey knowledge of Scurvy with other skills that are sure to jumpstart the Marauders to a competitive status. In the locker room, Scurvy and Minman will be expecting the team to be an active group of like minded hockey enthusiasts to encourage each other and bring about a successful cohesive unit. The locker room is going to be just one point of emphasis to show that Scurvy is all in to get the team to its competitive goals. One last thing to solidify Scurvy’s desires to do what’s best for the Miami Marauders is that he turned down multiple requests by @ScottyP to be allowed to hang onto Scurvy’s coattails and be an interference to the success of the Miami Marauders. 563 words

Classic!

1. New York came close to ending one of the longer runs in the VHL of not making the finals at 37 season as they haven`t made the finals since S67 so share a date with the Maple Leafs of the NHL so who is more likely to break their curse first; New York or Toronto? Why? That’s an easy one. I’m goin with New York. @STZ is the GM for New York and he’s got a plan. If STZ were the GM for the Maple Leafs, well then that would be a different story. 2. Bunny day was last weekend did you do anything special for Bunny days since I think we were eliminated already by that time? What did you do if anything? My wife got me sick and I spent the weekend on my ass coughing up a storm, sucking down theraflu, nyquill, and water. Told the bunny to skip this house. 3. Spring is the best time of year why? I prefer the summer because its warmer and less rain, and I can kick back at the pool and soak i the sun and not have to run down to Mexico to turn my sculpture into the bronze bull. 4. NHL Playoff or VHL playoffs; Which are you watching and why? I’ve been watching playoff hockey. Last night’s game was incredible. Oilers pulled it off. As far as VHL, I read the results every day. Sad to see NY go. 5. White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate? Why? I prefer milk chocolate over white chocolate. I guess the reason would be that a 100 grand bar with white chocolate might look like an old piece of dog shit. 6. Best Easter Candy why? I’ve always been a fan of peeps or even marshmallow filled eggs or bunny’s. I’m also partial to the old fashioned jelly beans. Problem for me is if it’s in the house, I’ll eat it. So, dont bring any home. 7. Bonus: How do you eat your Easter Bunny by the ears, break him a part or by the feet? it all depends on if its hollow or solid. If it’s solid then I cut it with a knife. If it’s hollow i go for the narrowest part. But i cant remember the last time I had a bunny to eat. 8. Bonus Bonus: Bacardi or Morgan? Why? They both serve their purpose. Bacardi when its part of an alcoholic concoction, and Morgan when it is going with a soda or something similar.

I remember Lloyd Braun. Classic name! Good to have you and your experience back.

It’s that time again, to come up with a topic to write about. I wanted to do a multi week task so I could relax during the off-season, especially now that Vancouver was wrongfully beaten by the New York Americans. Instead, I keep coming back to something @Scurvy commented about the other day. He mentioned that he tried to build his player, Logan Ninefingers, like his previous player Brian Payne, and another player who I cannot remember. He complained that he couldn’t measure up. So this caused me to do a deep dive into the similarities and uniqueness to Brian Payne and Logan Ninefingers. But first, I have to let everyone know that both of these players are incredible VHL players and Scurvy shouldnt be complaining about any deficiencies he feels Ninefingers might have over Brian Payne, unless its related to the lack of one digit. Brian Payne is a hall of fame defender who helped Warsaw win the Continental Cup in season 84. In season 85, Payne won the Sterling Labatte Trophy and Jake Wylde Trophy. He was clearly a monster on the ice and deserved the accolades of the top defender, and top defensive defender awards. In season 85 he scored 21 goals, had 67 assists for 88 points, with a +44, and 241 hits along with 200 shots blocked. In season 86, Brian Payne was a repeat winner of the Jake Wylde Trophy, no doubt due to his statistics and impact on the ice. With 17 goals, 63 assists for 80 points and +38, along with 246 hits and 148 shots blocked. Logan Ninefingers, a sturdy left winger playing center for Vancouver, was instrumental in the Wolves securing the Continental Cup in season 96. Ninefingers started his career in promising fashion, winning the two way forward award in the VHLM and the VHLE, and he has been a dominating forward in the VHL, including accumulating 107 points in season 97. Ninefingers still has two seasons to continue to perform how Scurvy’s players perform. Comparing the two Scurvy players, Ninefingers has scored 225 goals in 432 games, while Brian Payne scored 147 goals in 576 games. Payne outshined Ninefingers in assists, 476 to 285. Payne also leads in the ± with 184 over Ninefingers +103. The next few categories separate the men from the boys, the Howe’s from the Byngs, the whiskey from the white claws. These are also likely what sent Brian Payne into the hall of fame. Brian Payne was a tough guy; a defensive defenseman, who spent plenty of time in the penalty box. Payne spent 1684 season minutes in the sin bin, and he was proud of most of those minutes. Logan Ninefingers is more refined and has netted only 603 minutes thus far in his career. Brian Payne liked to hit, tacking up 2064 hits in his career to Ninefingers 1179. And Brian Payne sacrificed his body blocking shots, stopping the puck from getting close to the goal 1326 times to Logan Ninefingers’ 163. All differences aside, Scurvy has clearly built two outstanding players who serve up solid stats to their teams. Brian Payne was a star studded defender who clearly made his mark in the league with power and strength, while Logan Ninefingers is a high scoring forward who puts “W” on the board. Ninefingers has 49 game winning goals in his career and is a team leader in all categories. 570 words

Pinky