A Public Apology to Sam

[thadthrasher 1,692]

 

 

I know, the title probably made you think, "Oh boy, what happened now..." but it's not like that. It's worse.

 

You see, I do actually owe @samx a deep and sincere apology, and I made a promise that it would happen. As a condition of this trade I promised to publicly apologize to Sam for something that I had said. Now that the trade has gone through it's time for me to fulfill my end of the deal. After all, I am a man of my word.

 

The Backstory:

It was a cool Wednesday night. A night filled with pain and discomfort. Nothing would help the pain subside, and I felt stuck. I felt as if I was never going to be without pain again. For as of that Wednesday morning, I began my Invisalign treatment. In case you haven't seen my incredibly wonderful face before, I have some pretty messed up teeth. Ever since I was a young boy I wanted to fix them, but when you grow up poor you don't get that luxury. But, now as a big boy with a big boy job, I can.

 

The day started off with excitement. The tightness of the trays on my teeth weren't too bad at first, but boy did that pain escalate. It went from a small pressure, to a little discomfort, to me having a massive headache. It was a progression of chaos that no one could stop, and unfortunately, I lashed out. Not only did I lash out, but Sam was the unfortunate soul who was at the tail end of my aggression. 

 

I had entered into my locker room on Discord on Wednesday, November 24th, 2021. My faithful and trusty AGM, Jarl Kisslinger @Kisslinger had been chatting away, keeping our locker room activity going. I, in pain yet excited, announced that I had submitted lines. Now, I don't remember exactly what Sam had said in response to my statement, but whatever it was set me off. Something inside of me snapped. I could hear nothing but a loud ringing in my ear, my vision went red, and I typed out my response. At first it was nothing at all, just a statement of surprise. But, then the boil over happened and I said something that was deeply hurtful. That is why this apology is happening.

 

I do want to warn you that what you are about to read may be offensive...

 

The Hurtful Thing:

Spoiler

 

The Apology:

I don't know about the rest of you who are reading this, but I know that we all have moments where we regret the things we say. We have a momentary lapse in judgment and it's like the flood gate of awful and terrible things in our minds come pouring out in a rolling river of daggers aimed at the hearts of the people around us. As you can see, I attacked not only Sam, but something that she holds near and dear to her heart...

 

Spoiler

chicky nuggets

 

Now that I have laid the evidence before you, I would like to take this time to say this.

 

Sam, from the bottom of my heart... no, the very core of my being, I...am...sorry. What I said to you was uncalled for, mean spirited, and just down right bad.

 

Allow me a moment to express my apology in the form of a poem.

 

Apologies

There's never been a time like this

where the words of my mouth came with such a hiss.

They lashed out poorly and made you weep.

And now my sorrow is stupid deep.

 

The depth of sorrow that I feel,

is enough to make a grown man keel.

And although this pain is great in my chest,

I know you feel it more than the rest.

 

But, what else could I say to one I've hurt,

"I'm sorry, forgive me," well that just won't work.

You see, these words are boring and over used,

and frankly, I'm sure, you're unamused.

 

Fret not my friend, there's more to say,

my hope is that soon we'll return to play.

I wished a curse upon your tongue,

and I realize now that was the lowest on the rung.

 

Well here I stand in confidence to say,

that I wish nuggets would surround you each and every day.

May they always be warm and with a breading so light,

that each bite you take fills you with joyful delight.

 

Let the dip that you use add flavor so full,

and may the taste be as bold as a raging bull.

With each bud on your tongue shall you taste every piece,

and with this poem here now may our fighting cease.

 

Your love of nuggets rivals most marriages,

and they pull you along like horses with carriages.

May this apology find you well and fill up your heart,

for I hope you and nuggets are never apart.

 

----

816 words, Claiming week ending 12 December 2021

*this was clearly us joking around*

 

 

Edited December 7, 2021 by thadthrasher

[samx 1,173]

3 minutes ago, thadthrasher said:

*this was clearly us joking around*

this was no joke to me.

[Ricer13 2,796]

I feel an apology was not required. I support your original statement. 

[Spartan 4,402]

I'm going to deny this media spot once you claim because this is weenie-like behavior to the max and is completely unacceptable.

 

Fuck yo chicken strips nuggets

[samx 1,173]

Just now, Ricer13 said:

I feel an apology was not required. I support your original statement. 

this is why I requested a trade from u

[Ricer13 2,796]

4 minutes ago, samx said:

this was no joke to me.

This is why I completed the trade

Edited December 7, 2021 by Ricer13

[samx 1,173]

2 minutes ago, Ricer13 said:

This is why I completed the trade

worked out wonderful for me

[Dom 1,445]

@thadthrasherwhen are you apologizing to me for baiting me into americans sentiments?

[thadthrasher 1,692]

17 minutes ago, Dom said:

@thadthrasherwhen are you apologizing to me for baiting me into americans sentiments?

Never

[The Domino Archives 334]

i thought this was real

Edited December 7, 2021 by Domino

[Shindigs 1,771]

*Makes happy Velociraptor Noises*

[Daniel Janser 2,169]

3 minutes ago, Shindigs said:

*Makes happy Velociraptor Noises*

This is a thing? I thought that there are two Velociraptor noises: 'agressive' and 'annoyed'.

Edited December 7, 2021 by Daniel Janser

[Shindigs 1,771]

Just now, Daniel Janser said:

This is a thing? I thought that there are to Velociraptor noises 'agressive' and 'annoyed'.

Whoa, are you saying all Velociraptors sound alike to you?

 

I mean they sound pretty happy when they are eating stuff. So that counts right?

[samx 1,173]

41 minutes ago, Shindigs said:

*Makes happy Velociraptor Noises*

You take the whole velociraptor thing to a new level lmao

[Daniel Janser 2,169]

56 minutes ago, Shindigs said:

Whoa, are you saying all Velociraptors sound alike to you?

 

I mean they sound pretty happy when they are eating stuff. So that counts right?

I have not taken Velociraptor classes unfortunately (I was too busy with German, French and English) and therefore my mastery of this without a doubt very expressive language is rudimentary at best. Some even say Velociraptor is the Dinosaur equivalent of Farsi.

 

To me as an untrained listener their sounds express 'I am gonna kill you', 'I just have killed, and have a trace of my next victim' or 'I cannot find anything to kill (sad emoji)'.

 

If I offended any Velociraptor(ette)s on this forum, I sincerely apologize for this, that was not my intent. 

[Shindigs 1,771]

23 minutes ago, samx said:

You take the whole velociraptor thing to a new level lmao

Can't help myself, being about as much of a boomer as @JardyB10 the Jurassic Park nostalgia is getting to me.

[Doomsday 4,130]

When is Thad going to apologize for being so gosh-darned handsome?

[Shindigs 1,771]

11 minutes ago, Doomsday said:

When is Thad going to apologize for being so gosh-darned handsome?

"Maybe he's born with it? Maybe it's Clue Glue™" #TeamClue

[JardyB10 4,865]

1 hour ago, Daniel Janser said:

If I offended any Velociraptor(ette)s on this forum, I sincerely apologize for this, that was not my intent. 

Looks like your apology Media Spot is next.

 

Anyway, reading this Media Spot randomly conjured an image in my head of Sam’s wedding day or honeymoon, where her loving partner will lay a trail of chimken nugs to a beautiful 4 post canopy bed, where dozens of heart shaped nuggets are arranged in the shape of a heart on the blankets.

 

Then Sam and her spouse will sit there and feed each other nuggets with their dagger-like talons and talk about their complex relationship with Chris Pratt. A truly romantic evening.

 

Of course housekeeping is going to be pissed the next day having to clean up all those fucking crumbs everywhere, but it’s a small enough price to pay.