Banackock

Good win.

Well, the struggle is real. This week was the first week of my girlfriend's chemo, work has been kicking my ass, life in 2020 is a weird one and well, it's been a long time on here. I always remembered a few members talking about being around for some time and after a while you start to think to yourself, "what this week?". I think I'm kinda getting to that point. I don't really think that's the case. I just think everything else is on overdrive and this is one of the things that I am still doing 100%, but the effort to hit 100 requires quite a bit more energy. Fortunately, last week was theme week and the blue team was gracious enough to allow us to capitalize on a doubles week to earn some sweet TPE. I wrote the blab-fest on new players coming into the league from Fast Food chains and figured I got another doubles week thanks to donations that one idea might as well get two birds stoned at once and get this shit-fest under with, over with and hopefully forever forgotten. This week, we're coming at you with some hot, hot moves. Last week we seen Colonel Sanders, The Burger King and the golden arch boy, Ronald McDonald. We're back at you with some more fire. Who is this weeks fast food chain F, D and G? LEZ GO. LW - Wendy Height: 5'10"" Weight: 155 pounds Number: 77 Let's get this right off the bat in saying that these burgers are probably some of the best of the best? I don't know. I get the #7 Homestyle Chicken and that bad boy is always a fucking delight. You know what else is a delight? Her puck skills, her moves, her dangles and them red piggy tails you see swiping in the wind as she dekes your ass at the blue line and leaves you high and dry. She started playing hockey when the franchise opened up, in hopes of getting some of her establishments opened up in arenas throughout North America, however, the brand never caught on. Fortunately, though, while the brand may not have caught on for something that would work during a game, she did manage to catch the eyes of some NHL scouts (rumor has it, the Oilers are looking into to her, so take the report with a grain of salt... they have her lined up as the next best thing since Nail Yakupov). They capped the scouting report off with the saying "you know when it's real.." and we're unsure if they were talking about her talent or their beef. Shit! D - Chuck. E. Cheese Height: 6'6" Weight: 217 Pounds Number: 64 I've never been, so if you have and it's amazing, I apologize ahead of time. To be fair, I see why kids go somewhat bonkers over this place. Yet, when I seen the commercials, it was a big "meh" for me. You got a lot of arcade games and that usual shit and I think they deserve you a wack load of pizza. Oh, cool. Real original. Even still, it's crack for kids. The big old mouse himself has done real good bringing in the cheese and he's never afraid of some good old cheddar. This is likely why he's a roller hockey champion. Yeah, we know. It's not ice hockey so it doesn't count, but if you seen this guy play, you'd probably think otherwise. He kills people. He's huge. This is one big mother fucking mouse. He'd have Dumbo or any elephant shitting bricks over him. He's laying people on the ice and even has a nickname for any form of a big solid hit in a game. Commentators have been calling it the "Mouse Trap". Also original. I can only imagine putting skates on this guy. Someone needs to do it. I bet you 3 TPE Chuck. E. Cheese makes the HoF before Beaviss. After all, one thing you can say about him... When your hungry for fun, it's Chuck. E. Cheese. G - Hamburglar Height: 6'3" Weight: 210 Pounds Number: 30 I know, I know.. what the hell. You already did McDonalds, why you doing it again? You got Ron. He's a big, flashy center, who is good at putting the puck in the back of the net. He can also make super dope passes and make magic happen on a nightly basis when his game is on point. Can you really have Ron, though, and not his arch nemesis, the Hamburglar? This man has been stealing the magical goodness known to you as McDonalds burgers since Ronald was kicking on the streets of Saskatoon with @gorlab (smoking darts behind the local 7/11, sharing a box of them nasty late night, bar hopping wings, while your mouth taste like an ashtray, Doritos and jagerbombs). Once he found out that Ron was potentially fucking with the VHL, he just has to get involved. Hamburglar was on the Ellen Degeneres' new T.V show after being cancelled for being an c word called "Not the Ellen Degeneres' Show" to talk about the recent move to hockey and had this to say... "Ron's a bitch".

He is ok

He is ok

MOSCOE MOWCOW MOSCOW

SEATTLE SEATTLE SEATTLE

Yaaaa

Shut up, plate.

Things are much, much more advanced now, hehe. Sim leagues, or ours, finally caught up to 2020 (or close to it anyway). Good to see you back!

Good stuff as always.

What a season it's been. Seattle is rolling with the tops dogs once again this season and just when everyone is putting their guard down on the Seattle Bears, there they are. I feel like it's been a good run with this team and overall, we're above where we thought we would reach in terms of success and longevity. I don't think people thought it was going to be this long for success with the Bears. The most famous saying about the team during the late 60's, maybe S70 too, was that the team was gonna get fucked by the Salary Cap, lose a bunch of shit and probably not be able to bounce back to the levels they were at. I think we did an extremely nice job proving them wrong, making some massive moves and making sure we were a couple of steps ahead of the game when it really mattered (which was always. Not only are the Bears near the top once again this season, but a massive milestone is coming up for their GM, Blake Campbell. Being in his 25th season consecutively with the Bears, one has to wonder when his time is gonna end and just how much sand is left in that career hour glass of his. To chase some more words for the word count, here he is. "Awesome season so far. Been a lot of fun. I think what's special about this season, like it is with almost every season, is the group of guys we have in the locker room. There's some new guys, some old guys and it makes a healthy mix. We've been through it all but we're used to the shitty starts and that's what helps us I think. Every season we start off shitty. We were off to a pretty shit start this season if I'm remembering 100% correctly. Maybe the record wasn't too terrible, but things were just going weird and you could tell some guys were trying to find their hands and wheels. Now we're 47-17-3, tied for 1st place and have the most wins and goals in the league. FYI, we have 261 goals for. The next closest team has 238, so that largely speaks volume that our players are stepping up big time for Ray this year who arguably has done his share of piggy backing the team. The most recent sims were just done within the last half hour (of this sentence, 12 minutes ago). London beat us last sim, barely, but still embarrassingly. Seems as though it was a fuck up by STHS because we kicked their ass and made them shit their pants with a 9-0 blanket. Five players had 3 points or more, Doktor is leading the way with 5 massive points. Apparently we played them a second time during this sim and it was a 4-1 win. Great game by everyone! Strong play heading into the final few sims and playoffs. I'm very, very happy with the team this season. I think we still played above expectations, which is something this group is very good at doing. Once again, we have very good odds at going the distant. This is something that we've been able to say almost every season since we started this cycle and to be honest, you'd think it would wear off, but it doesn't" Should be my media spot, ffs. Oh well. PBE affiliate, too.

WWWWWWWW

fk ya mate KILL

L...ol

A W?!?! What is this?!

Woah, woah, woah. Now I understand. Good luck @Kylrad!!

Love me some Seattle Bears! Always a good read, @Doomsday! Thanks, man!!

Got so used to Jaguar he named his player after what he’s known for?

@Walter Fizz ???????

Good luck

USA

rigged Congrats once again to everyone on a wonderful tournament. I love showcasing and grouping a bunch of M players together and making magic happen. Thanks to both commies + Josh for running the show/simulating.