fonziGG

Haha I'm assuming you're a Simpsons fan if you've noticed the name?

Seymour Butts 6'8" 250lbs Burnaby, Canada Seymour was born in Burnaby to a very loving and passionate hockey family. Seymour was determined as ever to become a hockey player. He grew up watching the Vancouver Wolves and their historic runs for the cup. He started strength training, skating and practicing his puck handling skills at such a young age. His father helped him every single day. At the time, his parents were very young and agile. In fact, they were both 20 years old when they had him. Seymour started to light up the local leagues he was in. He started to play with groups much older than him as well. At 7 years old, he was playing with the U12 team at his local rink. He did not look out of place at all. The coach staff knew they had something special with him and expected him to become a VHL player one day. At 11 years old and on his U14 team, he became the captain and lead his team in points. They were undefeated and went to nationals to win it all. This was when the attention started to shine on Seymour. One fatal day, Seymour was riding his bike to school in a rough area. You see, Seymours family was young and living in a very expensive city in Vancouver. They had to move to a less desirable area in order to just survive. There was a drive by shooting and Seymour was hit with a stray bullet. It lodged into his lower back. The doctors concluded that he would never be able to walk again. Seymour was beyond depressed. He couldn't believe that not only were his hockey days gone; his ability to walk was gone as well. At the age of 15, Seymour decided enough was enough and went in for a experimental surgery that might be able to bring back his ability to walk. His family was nervous as was he. However, it was a success. The new problem was that he had lost most of his muscle in his legs. He had to start from square one again. After around 7 months of rehabilitation and overall hard work, Seymour skated for the first time in 3 years. This was a defining moment in his career. He lost all his skating ability and prowess but the fact that he could just put a skate to the ice, he felt at peace. At 17, Seymour was back in local hockey, not dominating but was working on bringing his old reflexes back. His stick handling skills, shooting ability and upper body strength were top notch. However, his skating was very rough. A former successful coach in the VHL, Moammar Morris Szyslak, had learned of what happened to Seymour and wanted to lend his expertise to the young lad. Moammar, nicknamed Moe, had trained Seymour to the point of his return. He was ready to go pro. Alas, the Philadelphia Reapers took him as a 4th round pick and the rest is history. Seymour still has the potential, but they know he is going to take a lot of physical work to get there.

Dude I'm getting fat as hell. I've been eating so many cheesesteaks recently. I mean, they're so delicious. I really should start cooking more or hire a chef or something. Actually, I should be hiring a nutritionist and a trainer. I think it's about time I start taking my career more seriously, as well as my health. I've gained 15 lbs in 3 months since moving here. To be honest, I'm not trying to build a home gym or anything. I think if I hire some staff that follows me from team to team and isn't location based. If I start focusing on hockey and making sure I play hard in every shift I'm in, I'm certain that I will succeed. I've been lifting heavier at the facility, stretching has been keeping me fluid and my skating is still dodgy but we've been working on it. Philadelphia has been good to me and I'm glad to be here. I hope that the team can break out of this funk. Lets get the Reapers back on track. We got this. You know what they say, play for the shirt on the front and they will chant the name on the back.

NGL I just picked B for some answers hoping I was right

NGL they probably taught us that but I slept through it all or something.

Ironically, I passed my exam today. I had no idea what the hell I was doing but I'll take my passing grade and go

1. We've been slipping recently. We all do need to work hard together and as a collective. 2. I enjoy the shit out of this league. 3. Houston Bulls right now. 4. Abbotsford Timbers 5. Sam Timmons 6. Salo however he just got traded 7. As a Canucks fan, HELL YES. Jimbo and Green gone is incredibly helpful. Bruce is going to be a revelation. 8. Has to be Vimto. Look it up. It's a tamarind soda you can get an local indian shops. 9. Ummm, you can't play in Philly and not like a cheese steak. That's illegal as hell.

So, I have an exam tomorrow. I'm taking a course currently for my calculus class and I have a big exam to prepare for. Instead, I'm sitting here writing this. I mean, I could be meditating or praying for a miracle but no. I'm uselessly just wasting time. Why? Mostly because I am very afraid of the game we have tomorrow. Playing against San Diego is a tough game. In fact, it's taking away any angst I have for this exam. In fact, I couldn't give a shit if I pass or fail. I just need to get a 40% just to pass on this exam due to curve. We're all incredibly stupid at this subject even if we try our asses off. I'll probably barely pass because I'm a genius. I'm not a genius. I work extremely hard for my grades. I'm actually a dumbass 97% of the time. In fact, if I wanted to be a bit more accurate it's closer to 97.4%. Anyways, this week @Alex_J32 and @Masu Chanhave been kicking the shit out of me at practice. All I keep hearing is a variation of, "STRONGER" or, "FASTER". Honestly they have been a very ideal set of coaching staff for my development and I know they're going to get me to the VHLE stronger and faster than I have ever been before. I know that I'll probably be on the chopping block for Philadelphia as I might have some value. Not a whole lot of value but some. I mean, I might be valued around a 2nd round pick or so. This could be a huge pick for the Reapers as they have so many picks for the upcoming draft. If I had to guess where I would be traded to, it would probably be somewhere in the other division. Most likely the bulls or the Aces. Just to strengthen their core and be a strong depth piece. Do I want to be traded? Well, I'd be happy to play for any team that wants me. Do they want to trade me? I have no idea. I could be completely off base and they don't even want to trade me. In fact, they could think I have 0 value at all. Would make sense considering I was lazy as shit when I first got scouted. I'm still lazy as shit. Granted, I have an opportunity to really appease the Reapers fans and showcase my potential. I know I could play better than I have been, I could be stronger and I could be a defensive monster for the future in the VHL. The goal has forever been the VHL. I intend to win and give everything I possibly can. Anyways, I'll leave you here. It's been a long blog post that I probably could've been summarized a bit. Whatever, I mean you guys can see whats been on my mind. Have a good week everyone. I hope its the best week you could possibly have. Seymour Butts

I fell on my ass. It's a thing. Whatever. All the memes in the media has been a bit crazy to be honest. I saw a clip of the incident and it had over 5 million views in 4 hours. 5 million people watched that, in 4 hours. What the actual frig is that about? Just let me be me lads. I get the humour because my last name is Butts. Haha. So funny. Jeez, Seymour Butts fell on his butt. HAHA. There will be a day where I get retribution. Where I will win some award and get my pride back. There will be a day where I show you something worth of value of play. I know, I'm a terrible skater and barely know how to hold the stick but I can slap that puck harder then the hulk could, probably. I also can barely be an adult. So what I have a drinking problem? So what if I snort more cocaine then Robert Downey Jr, Drew Barrymore and my mother? I enjoy it and it makes me feel alive. Would I endorse these behaviours to someone else? Hell yes I would but uh, maybe I'm not a reliable source of positive influence.

1. I'm very excited for this team. Lets get to work everyone!!!! 2. Incredible. This team is built to win if we play it right. 3. I want to be a defensive powerhouse. 4. Leadership. I expect the captain to steady the ship. 5. I'm just hoping to be 0.5 ppg. 6. Yes, I love the colour scheme. 7. OVIE BABY!!!! 8. The Vancouver Canucks. 9. Mint chip or a spiced mango. YUM

Hello VHL. It's been some time, in fact, it's been a long time. The VHL looks slightly different then when I stepped down from Vancouver, BOG and the Mod team. I'm so glad to see the league doing better than ever, in my opinion. I haven't seen the VHL so progressive since the time I joined the league. Anyways, I guess it's time to talk about me and what's going on. Over the past 6 months, I've been really busy. Like, sleeping 3 hours a night busy. I think I left you guys off with a work promotion. The job I got was honestly the best thing I ever got in years, exactly where I want to be for the foreseeable as well. However, when I accepted the position, I never thought I'd be having to give up my jobs here, infact, I realized it was a complete shit show. Slowly and slowly, I was commenting less on the forum and discord. I always had the discord open on my second monitor and kept an eye on general chat. However, I had so much focus on making what I believed was my only chance to truly make my mark in the position that I had dreamed to get. I started to not only neglect my VHL family, but also my own family. So, once I realized what was happening, I decided it's time to look elsewhere. My wife and I decided that this career move wasn't going to be what we needed. Currently, I hold the same job title as before but at a different company with a lot less responsibilities and much more support. It's still a lot of work and I don't see myself wanting to take up a big job here in the VHL again, however, I do feel I have enough time to return to full activity. This league has been such a great community to me and I knew I didn't want to give it up at all. I'm just glad I'm back. Seymour Butts is my new player. He'll be getting all my love and attention. If any GM's see this in the VHL and E leagues, don't be afraid to draft me. I will be present, active and try and provide one hell of an experience in the locker room. I've decided that Seymour is going to be the player I try my best at. I will be competitive this go around since I want to win. I want to be a part of a franchise that will be pragmatic, passionate and hungry to win EVEN if this includes trading my old haggy ass to win. I won't be naming any teams that I think will be winners in the near future however I will be assessing closer to my draft date to either league. I think the best way to name it would be a team that is pragmatic. Anyways, if you have any questions for me including in the future, please send them to my Discord as I really don't check the site much unless I'm drunk as shit or doing my tasks

Thanks brotha.

Player Information Username: fonziGG Player Name: Seymour Butts Recruited From: Returning Age: 18 Position: D Height: 80 in. Weight: 250 lbs. Birthplace: Canada Player Page @VHLM GM

I am scared to see what you said about me ngl

We never did, however when I took over and players requested trades, I knew I had to rebuild. I'm just sad I couldn't finish this rebuild.

Hello everyone! Today I write with a very heavy heart that I will be stepping down the GM position for Vancouver. Vancouver was a passion and I never saw myself leaving this early into my tenure. However, I received a promotion at work that would see me take increased hours weekly and a few other IRL commitments will take up all my time. I just want to say it was a pleasure and honour to take up the position and I want to thank @Beketov and @Quik for hiring me. I want to thank everyone on the Vancouver Wolves roster, @Nykonax for being a the best AGM I've ever had, @Sixersfan594 for being the OG AGM who had my back every single step of the way, and to @Beaviss for drafting me to the Wolves which gave me a passion for a team again. I'll never forget that championship run with the incredible roster we had. Thank you, Vancouver.

No top goalie huh?

Haha this is such a specific thing it's insane. My mom worked in the tourism industry that included meeting with booking agents in China, Korea and Taiwan. They all believed it was good luck to sign with my mom because my ears were large and thats means good luck. Crazy call unless you know me IRL

"I can't believe I was selected to play for Mississauga to play under @Zetterberg and @MexicanCow123. Both have been so integral towards my defensive game and development. MC is now going to be training me more and more on my offensive side of the game which I'm super excited for. I think the team really needs me to step up offensively and I'm going to provide that in fashion. My offensive prowess has felt natural too. I've always been taught to be a no-nonsense defensemen and I think these guys are really bringing it out of me. Heck, @Nykonax has been a hell of a defensemen partner by stepping up on the defensive end to allow me to push forward a little bit. I've been helping him defensively and he's been helping me offensively too. @BarzalGoat is also pushing me to be better and stronger every single day. Barzy is such a great defender coming up, any team in the VHLE and VHL will be lucky to grab him in the upcoming draft at the end of the season. So much talent in this roster that I can't wait to see in the top leagues. I'm so excited to see the introduction of the VHLE as well since some of these players are going to absolutely rip it up sooner rather than later.

1. I've definitely upped my scoring like crazy. I'm really impressed! 2. Z and MC are fantastic GM's. Really glad I get to develop under both of them! 3. VHL straight BB 4. Haha, I'd probably speak my home language first (gujerati). 5. Da Wolf Bois. I don't mind sharing it with @Nykonax 6. I think we can as a collective. We have such a strong group here and I genuinely believe we can win it all!

Bonjour

1) What are your thoughts on the teams performance so far this season? I'm suck ass but we're doing pretty good right? 2) Is your player performing how you expected them to? Not at all lmao. 3) Do you think management needs to make any transactions? Keep buying LETS WIN BABY. 4) Do we have a shot at making the playoffs, or will we end up choking hard? I think we do. 100% 5) How do you feel about your ice-time? Are you comfortable with the amount of minutes? Anything for the team, if you ask me. 6) Finally, do you want to stay in Mississauga or do you want out of here? It's time I get back to Vancouver next season

G- Markus Emerson