Ramicus

I can do these. My grammar is impeccable, and I read a lot of them, anyway.

I have spoken to a great many people on this site. There are some with whom I have spoken many times, while others have been one time occasions. One person with whom I particularly enjoy conversing is Merica. We have a grand time. He's pretty cool, and very patriotic. I will now share some words of wisdom given to me just for this little article. Merica did things a little differently, giving me a little essay instead of tidbits. I'll give you the essay, then comment at the end. “My advice to someone entering the real world, or adulthood, whichever term you prefer, is to never become complacent, set your goals and strive to achieve them, never quit, because if you quit once you will do it again, and again and again, it is not a path you want to go down, because it’s a hard mindset to get out of. Surround yourself with people who will be honest with you, friends who will tell you the truth and won’t lie to you because they don’t want to hurt your feelings. Always be aware, never allow yourself to fall into the all too current fad of ignorance, because ignorance is the farthest thing from bliss and it isn’t an excuse to mess up, contrary to popular opinion. Be open to new things, because there is always something new to learn or discover, but don’t just take someone’s word for it, educate yourself, guard your mind, and don’t allow it to become polluted. Now, you might be thinking,”this guy is painting the world as a terrible place”, and that isn’t my intention…The world is full of amazing people and amazing things, but if there is one thing you take out of all of this, it’s that evil exists, and even though everyone wants to say ”oh, it’ll never happen to me”, remember that the people that it does happen to said the exact same thing. There will be plenty of people in your life who want to ignore what is going on around them, but I’ll never be that person. Enjoy life, but don’t be ignorant and remember the person sitting next too could be the next story on CNN because he shot up a local school, or the guy in front of you at the grocery store could be a rapist stalking his next victim. I’ll end this on a good note: once you discover what it is that you love to do, the one thing that you wake up every morning wishing you could do, go after it. Don’t spend your life wishing and dreaming.” As I'm interpreting it, Merica is telling us to maintain a balance in the way we live. Live life to its fullest, and never settle for whet you don't want. On the other hand, we need to keep our wits about us, because the guy next to you on the 4 train might be a future school shooter. But I believe what he says at the beginning and the end is most important. Everyone has their dream, and most people go through life without ever reaching their goal. If I may quote Arthur O'Shaughnessy, an English poet (and herpetologist, according to his Wikipedia page that I checked for his name's spelling), “One man with a dream, at pleasure, Shall go forth and conquer a crown.”

Is that the one with the turtle?

That is 7-11, Lere. I think.

I don't know, a free slurpee is a free slurpee.

I would've expected this from Gorlab, not you.

The Hero: When a Man or Freedom Fighter When we left off, George “The General” Patton was in a city in North America, a city that was and will remain unnamed for copyright purposes. He was in a car rented from a company that was like the pound, but American, sitting with his unnecessary eye candy sidekick, Cherry Baxter. In his hand was a fancy black box with a letter from a very rich Mr. Wayne, who, in George “The General” Patton's opinion, was obviously a famous superhero whose mascot was a flying nocturnal being that was not an owl. The box also held a plane ticket and some other papers, giving him a way to, and everything he would need in, Havana, Cuba. There was also a gun, but The General was choosing to ignore that and instead wait for his flight to Havana. Having spent more than enough time dealing with flights, we shall say that the itinerary took The General and Cherry Baxter (who refused to be called Cherry, or anything other than her full name) to Cancun, Mexico. There they had a three hour layover, and took an opportunity to sleep before boarding yet another flight, which landed in Aeropuerto José Martí, also known as Jose Marti Airport, just before 5:30 in the afternoon. From the airport, George “The General” Patton and Cherry Baxter received their rental car and drove to the address given to him. It was a tall building, larger than anything else in the area, and the address was a small door on the side of the building, far from the hustle and bustle of the main entrance. The General's superhero sponsor had talked about lighting a fire. Surely a grand entrance would be the way to do such a thing. Nevertheless, The General was an idiot, and opened the door all willy-nilly, putting all thoughts of potential consequences far out of mind (in the words of Jake Peralta, “Eyes closed, head first, can't lose”). Inside was a large, dimly lit, room, devoid of material things except a man standing in the shadows at the center of the room. “Mr. Patton.” “Mr. Wayne?” “Indeed.” “Are you really, I mean, are you B****n?” (censored for copyright purposes) “No. Why does everyone assume that!?” “I don't know, Wayne, rich, fighting evil. It all fit.” “Mr. Patton, my name is Corey Wayne. Bruce is my cousin.” “Awesome.” He grumbled under his breath. “Not as cool as B****n, though.” “Mr. Patton, when a man is mistaken for his cousin his entire life, it begins to grate on his nerves.” “So who are you?” “I am a freedom fighter, Mr. Patton. I fight HYDRA. And now you will, too.” The lights shut off suddenly, then came on at full force, blinding The General for a moment. Corey Wayne was gone, a piece of paper where his feet had been. “Mr. Patton, Enclosed please find: The box included documents for an apartment in this city. That is for your use. Inside you will find food, which is also for your use. This room will be your gym, should you wish to use it. Train as you see fit until you receive further instructions. Light a fire, Mr. Patton. -Mr. Wayne" Come back next week for… PUPPET MASTER or RULE OF THUMB

Aristotle

I have spoken to a great many people on this site. There are some with whom I have spoken many times, while others have been one time occasions. One person with whom I particularly enjoy conversing is Romanes Eunt Domus, formerly known as OCAirlines, known to some as Winters (that might just be me at this point). We have a grand time. He's pretty cool, even if he is an old geezer (sorry, man). I will now share some words of wisdom given to me just for this little article. “You have to make your own experiences. People can tell you a lot about life and the world but if you don't experience things and meet people yourselves, you'll never really get a deep understanding of things. So don't by afraid to try new things and meet new people.” - This is pretty sweet advice. I think that a lot of people spend their whole lives hiding in their own circles. This applies to myself just as much as it applies to anybody else, we need to branch out and, in RED's words, “experience things and meet people.” “Just try to keep an open mind throughout your whole life. Some people never had an open mind, others did when they were young but lost it later in life, you have to make sure that you aren't one of these people. There is nothing more important than being open to new ideas or points of view that contradict your own. It will help you grow as a person all your life if you do your best to understand other peoples arguments and motivations, even if they seem like terrible people at first.” This is good, too. Lots of people who are applying to college right now have their whole lives planned out, and have since they were little. College here, grad school there, working in this field, and then dying of stress at the age of sixty seven. RED is, I believe, saying that we need to have some wiggle room. The way we think and feel at the age of eighteen may be completely different from the way we think and feel at the age of twenty, or even nineteen. We shouldn't be so set in our ways that we can never change. In closing, dear readers, I will leave you with one last piece of advice from RED himself, with no explanation. “Oh, and do sports, there are very few things that are more healthy and rewarding in life.”

BD"E Praying for y'all.

How did this not get any replies? Looks good, man.

What, you don't like the quotes?

I have spoken to a great many people on this site. There are some with whom I have spoken many times, while others have been one time occasions. One person with whom I particularly enjoy conversing is Jaladolar. We have a grand time. Over the past however long we’ve talked, Jala has imparted to me some excellent pieces of advice. I would like to share some with you now, along with, perhaps, a comment from me. “start a retirement plan when you're young / 20 bucks a week even adds up / 20 bucks into a balanced stocks portfolio can rapidly add up” – This one is very timely and sage. As a youngster, sound financial advice is something I don’t get much, so I am very grateful to get some words of wisdom from Jala. “go to school for something worth a damn / don't get some piece of feces arts degree” – Another timely bit of advice. Many people my age are applying for colleges that offer majors they think will do them well in life. This seems like it could be very poetic, if phrased differently. It’s only work if you’d rather be doing something else. Someone’s probably said that before, anyhow. In closing, dear readers, I will leave you with a conclusion written for me by Jala himself. “In closing young Ramicus, all the problems you face in the world can be resolved with a slack jaw and loosened throat. Everything's difficult at first, but with enough practice (with a banana) you can overcome any challenge, no matter how big.”

Sounds like a plan.

The Hero: His Superpowers Don't or Start a Fire When we left off, George “The General” Patton was on an airplane. He was flying back to North America, to begin his fight against HYDRA, the terrorist group previously known to him only in comic books, in earnest. Last week, The General became a hero, with all the tools necessary to fulfil the job of a hero. He had his hockey skills. He had a little bit of contract money. He had military training that was decades old. He had citizenship in a member nation of the European Union. Alright, so maybe he didn’t actually have everything he needed. The passport would help, though. The checking strength might do him some good in a pinch. Oh, and he had his unexplained pin up girl sidekick, Cherry Baxter. She was going to be important. Other than her, though, he really didn’t have anything. He was halfway back to the United States when his phone began to vibrate in his pocket. Hadn’t he turned it off before taking off? No, because George “The General” Patton was an idiot. “Oh, I… I just need to go to the bathroom real quick.” It was lucky for Cherry Baxter that The General had chosen to sit on the aisle, and he scurried to the back of the plane (the actual back, because The General wasn’t making enough to fly first class on his minor league contract). The phone was still buzzing when he got to the tiny little airborne water closet, and he hastened to answer it. “George Patton here.” Because he actually had some phone sense, and didn’t just answer with a groggy “Uh… Hullo?” “Mr. Patton.” “Yes.” Hadn’t he just said that? “I have followed your journeys with great… interest.” “Thank you.” He wasn’t aware that his travels were being followed at all, let along with great interests. “A superhero is just what the world needs.” “My superpowers don’t—“ “A hero can be super without powers.” “Alright.” “Light a fire, Mr. Patton.” “What?” “Light a fire, Mr. Patton.” That was all the strange, deep voice would say. It was a somewhat odd thing to say before hanging up, but that was what the mystery voice did. “Alright then.” He stuck his phone back in his pocket and made his way back to Cherry Baxter. Upon landing in an undisclosed city (the name of this city cannot be revealed for copyright purposes) and walking into the terminal, George “The General” Patton and Cherry Baxter were met by a large man in a dark suit holding a black box. “Courtesy of Mr. Wayne, Mr. Patton.” The Bruce Wayne? He did not know. “I would advise that you open this elsewhere.” Whatever that meant. He grabbed the box and hurried away, to the desk of a rental car company that cannot be disclosed (Like the British pound, but American). A car was waiting for him as he’d requested, and from the safety of said car he opened the box. A note lay inside. “Mr. Patton, Enclosed please find: -A travel itinerary to Havana, Cuba. -The proper documents for an apartment in said city. -A Beretta M418. Keep this hidden. -An address in Havana. Go there when you arrive. Light a fire, Mr. Patton. -Mr. Wayne Well, that was all there was to it, it seemed. His journey would continue in Havana. Come back next week for… WHEN A MAN or FREEDOM FIGHTER

How dare you, Cufflink!? ___ was my favorite character! Come on, use a spoiler tag.

Everyone spells it differently.

If there are any other yiddin here, ah freilichen Chanuka. All you non-Jews, I get eight nights of presents.