Renomitsu

Hey Team Mercs - thanks so much for letting me GM you guys for this World Cup. Congrats to @Peace on winning Top Forward, and to everyone for helping us reach a bronze medal!

Review - As with other GMs' articles, I've always been a fan of retrospective/introspective articles looking at trades and draft classes; this is no exception. I'd argue your judgment of these players has been persistently true over the last month and a half since this article's writing, as sad as that is for Shane Mars (and separately for Clayton Park, whom I'm now happy to have over in Riga). No comments with regard to grammar/spelling except for possibly removing the comma in "BUT, it's exactly where I thought we'd be", which is probably more of a stylistic choice than an actual correct vs. incorrect distinction.

Review - 0/6 because you beat up HHH. Just kidding. Fantastic run from Palo and the Wolves this season, and good on you for turning an in-game fight into an out-of-game creative endeavor. The only thing I might fix is to swap in a semicolon where I've placed it, as the portions of this sentence before and after the semicolon are two related-but-separate ideas grammatically. It becomes a bit of a run-on otherwise. Thanks for making the VHL world just that much more immersive.

Review - Aww, look at us participating in world events! I'm sad to see a couple of these players no longer with the team, but that's a bit beside the point. This is nicely-written, but there are a couple of awkward sentences (e.g. 'Either real life or he feels like playing in minors is more fun than in bigs (at this moment, he's at 200 TPE') - the bolded bit is an odd start). It's nothing glaring or distracting - they're just the kind of sentences that will make me stop for a split second and then keep reading as if little else was wrong.

Review - Sometimes it's hard to justify the sim's outcomes on our players - and I always like a creative approach to under-performing, which clearly is a bit easier to justify after GMs see your TPE number. That aside, there are a couple of small errors (forgotten period at the end of second paragraph, capitalization of the word 'mental' in the following line), none of which significantly impact flow but change how the article appears superficially/aesthetically. I think you still ended up getting your message across effectively nonetheless!

Review - I have to say, the TPE as a performance enhancing drug was one of the funniest storylines from last season. It's creative to the point where you have doctor testimonials, the name selection was apt, and the way you describe TPE improving players is on-point. Great work.

Review - Interesting content, but there are a lot of ways this article could be smoothed out (though I know it's from two months ago). I do like a narrative style in general, but I'd recommend trying to break your article into paragraphs based on ideas or by major event. I would also recommend adding quotations/further punctuation to make starts and ends of sentences generally more coherent, e.g.: becomes: I'm not sure if the above is a copied-and-pasted quote, in which case it's OK to leave out the semicolon change. Since the second sentence could technically be two sentences (I'm gonna make a push... + are you good with...), you can either use a semicolon or a full stop to separate the ideas. Separating ideas out like this will also make it easier for you to review when you're done writing your article through the first time.

Review - Like a few other articles from the pre-S66 offseason, I always find articles discussing culture and non-hockey aspects of the VHL entertaining - it gives the league a little more life than we'd otherwise see. I did catch a couple of errors, e.g.: but in general, the article flowed well and I'm not overly concerned. I think this is an easy mistake to miss in a first or second pass. Nice work!

Review - Well, you got to the conference finals! Hopefully most things have turned out as you wanted them. I don't have any comments on composition, grammar, or spelling. I've always been a fan of this type of article, if only because it gives you a reality check when you look back on it a season later (i.e. now). Points may have not changed much, but that +/- tells all of the story you need to know.

aw jesus i've confused malmo with davos TIME TO FIX IT

Latvia, Riga - It's been a full season since Hackett was drafted by the Riga Reign while watching many of his Saskatoon Wild teammates split up across the nation. The VHLM was a simpler time, without much to worry about aside from where he'd be drafted, and what that might mean for his teammates. "72 games later and it feels like it's been an eternity, you know?" Hackett was quoted as saying in an off-season presser, "thankfully I get to see them every once in a while on the ice. Most of them went off to Malmo, so I get a good chance to talk to them in Sweden." Nighthawks GM Advantage drafted multiples of Hackett's minor league teammates, including defenseman Rusty Shackleford, goalie Juan Jaundice, and forward Brian Strong. Winger Shawnomir Jagr, on the other hand, was drafted by Vancouver. "Yeah, I know, Nethi's been all over the place," Hackett said with a smile, "started with Calgary while still in the minors, now he's over in New York, so it's a little less convenient to speak with him in person. I try to find some time here and there, though. I know it wasn't ideal for me to move up to the majors after such a short time with everyone." When asked if he expected the group to play together again at any point, Hackett balked a bit. "I mean, I think it's TAMPERING to discuss something like that. I'm happy in Riga, except for maybe that weird ref that the league still hasn't gotten rid of, so they'd probably have to come out here rather than the other way around. I will say I've spoken to the old boss [Peace] though."

Impressive game by Malmo here for sure. Lots of young but active players... could be spooky this season.

All that #1 pick and Vancouver franchise money has to go to something, you know ?

He's just trying to prepare you for a charcuterie board he's prepping for one of his fancy parties

@Steve with 2 assists this game! Already making his presence known ?

Never thought I'd live to see the day Stockholm faced Quebec but here we are

Dahlberg and Sigurdsson straight gooning @Nykonax ?

4 goals on 14 shots in the 3rd is brutal. ? Lights got too bright for Sterling I guess.

That shot differential is nuts. Guess we'll see what this means for the Bears in a few dozen games, huh?

Super physical game, including 6 hits from @Nykonax I think we'll want to consider shaking things up in the next few sims.

ACL TEAR strikes for the first time this season and takes out HHH ? Good game for the whole team this time around, especially some of our new players! Hopefully we can try to extend a larger lead next time.

F - Roctrion King @Joubo

GG Moscow. This one was definitely a nail-biter

You tagged me AND used math!?!? Aww, @GustavMattias, you shouldn't have! The only thing that could have made this better would be defense.

F - Randoms @street