Gustav

Dammit Tzuyu. I'm still hoping for an epic defenseman showdown between myself and @tfong this season. #fixthelottery

So apparently I managed to triple post. Interesting.

We demand answers bek

I'd buy either one of these shirts if people in real life actually were to understand them.

I'd buy either one of these shirts if people in real life actually were to understand them.

I'd buy either one of these shirts if people in real life actually were to understand them.

Doug's place or mine?

The Malmo Nighthawks recently made waves in the VHL graphics community with the release of a new design for their jerseys, which served as an inspiration to many and at the very least reached "interesting" status for most. The team became the second in the league to release what look to the casual observer to be extensively planned, extensively thought-out, meticulously designed jerseys, and the press recently sat down with Jonathan Pepper, Assistant General Manager of the Helsinki Titans and the mind behind the designs (OK, that last bit didn't really rhyme all that well), to gain a bit of insight on the matter. Take us through some of the more important features of the Helsinki jersey. JP: Well, you know, this team just came off a season where they were undeniably the best in the league, and we even won a cup. Our championship status was the first thing about our team that we wanted to represent, and that's why, if you look closely, you'll see some similarities with the jerseys of the NHL's St. Louis Blues. We both won cups around the same time, so I'd say it's fitting to draw a connection there. Previously, you saw our jerseys featuring a lot more teal, which was really just an interesting color we decided to throw in. We decided to darken the blue for two reasons: first, we wanted to represent the waters of the Baltic Sea, which, while beautiful, can be cold and unforgiving to the unfamiliar...just like the Titans. The exact blue that we chose wasn't coincidental, either--we wanted it to be somewhere in between the blue of the flag of Greece and that of the flag of Finland, to represent both the team's name and its location. We kept the teal as trim to pay homage to our old design, and we also added in some white trim to represent both the snow of an Arctic winter and, once again, the Finnish flag. If you notice a some black, too, there's another reference to our Finnish winters, where we see prolonged periods of darkness. Fascinating. So what about the Malmo design? Do we have many hidden messages in there, too? So I've got this green highlighter on my desk. I was stoned one day and I looked at it and I was like, "oh, hey, there's our jersey right there." I just kind of took a navy blue template and slapped a few fluorescent green lines on it and boom, that was that. That's it? No hidden messages? No references to Arctic winters? Nope. That's it. I was just really baked that day. Ok, good talk. Just kidding @Sonnet I love your jerseys.

Depends. Are we getting stoned or taking over the league?

Join me bana

It's all your fault @DilIsPickle

A bit late to the party but welcome @AnthonyOuellet! I can tell you'll be a good fit on any team. Good luck in Mexico City!

Maybe it's because I'm GM, but yes. please.

Well done, teammate.

Nyko are you ok

I'll sign myself up, won't be soon if we get a lot of interest right away but eventually you'll have the chance to give me hell.

What? The Thunderdome being used? Nah, man, you have to be kidding. ...but yeah, here we are, because a few people decided to reply to my status update about this. Here's what we'll be doing. 1. Each week I will create a thread in the thunderdome, in which one member who I have selected to be roasted shall be made available for any and all roasting activity through the entire duration of that week. The timeframe shall begin when I post the thread and it shall end at approximately 11:59 PM EST on Saturday of that week. 2. Only members who sign up below will be roasted. To sign up, simply reply to this post, and tell me you're in. It is encouraged, but not mandatory, that you also provide a brief history of your time in the league, and tag those who you think may be interested in taking you on. There is no cutoff date, so feel free to sign up whenever you'd like--just tag me if you come in late. 3. To ensure that those who are being roasted are able to be roasted by most active members, those who sign up must have at least 250 posts to their name to be entered. 4. Absolutely no roasting of any members who have not signed up to be roasted. Also, an important note: this is a place for roasting, not personal attacks or argument. If you have a serious issue with someone being roasted, don't get into that. Don't try to start anything. For the roastee, too, be sure to take roasts with a good sense of humor. The Thunderdome does not exist as a place for drama. Keep this in mind. Previous roast threads: Nykonax Enorama Victor DilIsPickle Beketov McWolf Matt_O and HulkHogan eaglesfan036 Quik Let me know if you'd like to be tagged (or wouldn't like to be tagged) in future roast threads. Spread the word!

Honestly? I have no idea. I love writing these things, no matter what they're about. I guess as a matter of general principle, I'm going to have to go with the entire collection of articles I've written about Halifax and their satanic adventures. It's what got me into writing here in the first place. The highest-effort shitposts I've written have been fairly recent, too--check out the article I wrote about Halifax's new logo, or my most recent media spot on the Gustav Effect. My favorite article, though, is one that I don't think I'll ever surpass in terms of pure accuracy: Gustav's Mock Draft, where I somehow managed to predict over 40% of all draft choices made in the first four rounds of S66. I'll never be that lucky again. Nobody can top Callum MacElroy, but since he's not on our team I'm going to have to go with Shackleford. He's pretty good, though I'd bet MORPHEUS could beat him if he understood the game. I'd love to pick up some of my guys--Jeff Downey and Jaxon Walker look like good prospects right out of the gate, and I'm looking forward to seeing where they go. Sign with us. Do it. 14 goals, 61 assists. 142 blocked shots, 177 hits, and a +/- in the 20s. Sadly, I think my defensive numbers won't be the league's greatest when I'm in my prime, but that's because we'll be a great team by then. Signing Skinner was a good move, but it's going to take a lot more than what they have now to win a cup. There's a long road there, but with the right moves and a bit of luck it's within reach. I hope so. I used to love the guy, now I think he's worthless. If they don't trade him, I hope he can at least return to where he was a couple seasons ago. I'm conflicted here--I love toppings, and I think having the right combination of flavors can make a good pizza great. Pepperoni is a must-have. Black olives, mushrooms, sausage, you know the deal. Can't go overboard, though--it's still a pizza. I'd say any more than two tends to get in the way. Fortnite bad Check out Florentine football when you get the chance. I have no idea what's going on, and that seems to be the point. I will say that I have my opinions, but I won't name anybody here. I don't want to potentially alienate myself or other members. I'm a very quiet borderline-inactive welfare member of the SBA and EFL. I joined for the affiliate checks but haven't been able to make myself get into either.

I just screamed "TAKE ME TO FLAVORTOWN BROTHER" and shoved half a burger in my mouth. Powerful and compelling graphics, these are.

Helsinki Toronto Malmo Seattle

Malmo 5-3

THANK YOU QUIK

I've found it by the way @Sonnet