Daniel Janser

Well deserved Jersey retirement. Molly the Cat lead a somewhat despised (or ridiculed) franchise to a Continental Cup win (and a final), setting various franchise records doing so. Chapeau @JCarson

Hey Phil. Fam and I went to EuropaPark (one of the bigger entertainment parks in Europe) as we won the tix in a lottery. It was pre-pre-opening so only 25,000 people were admitted (and all of them always were on the same ride as us ) It was fun but also exhausting at springy temperatures of around 15 centigrade (60F for imperialists)... no booze involved, as 1. I am not a big drinker to start with and 2. it is still lent.

laughs in alpine topography

1. The begin of a new season is here. What are the goals for your player? 2. What did your player pass his off-season with? 3. If you are participating in the VHFL, what positions do you tend to pick first and why? If you are not, what would your draft strategy be if you were? 4. Has our resident methusalem Phil Strasmore a shot at the HOF? Or is he more of a candidate for Gustav's 'Hall of not bad'? Elaborate your judgement. 5. I have been on Amusement Park over the weekend. What kind of ride do you like most? 6. What is your favourite amusement park food and why?

2/5 uncapped package

After the military service, the World Cup and a sweep defeat with the Birmingham Dragons against the Winnipeg Royals, his dad's team in the ProAm, Callum is heading home. He wonders whether Rin is already back in NYC. Well, he did not have to wait long, for that question to be answered. As soon as he landed at JFK and switched his phone back on he got a text from his roomie. 'Landing at JFK, 1230hrs. Can you pick me up?'. The Swiss immediately went to the next car rental and got a car for the day, as he had only 30 minutes left, until the 'Nagasaki Nightingale' landed. So he threw his belongings into the boot, texted the Japanese defender that he will pick her up and got back to the arrival terminal to do so. It took quite some time until the minuscule back showed up and Janser immediately understood what the issue was. 'Beast' left New York with one piece of carry-on and one medium sized checking luggage. She arrived in the Big Apple with two extra duffel bags, which looked pretty heavy. Callum relieved Rin from the luggage, carrying as if it weighed nothing. 'Did you buy a samurai kit while you were in Japan?'. 'No, most of it are the Manga's you have asked for. And then some clothing my family insisted I take with me. I could at least talk them out of cooking for me for the next few weeks. They still think there is no decent food in the US.' 'They do not know about Myoko-san's Japanese Restaurant in Soho then?' 'They think I invented him so they do not worry about my well being.' 'You should bring them over once. So I can meet them. You told me so much about your family, I would really like to get to know them in person.' 'Funny you should say that. My dad mentioned that him and mother would come over during the coming season.' 'Wow, that is awesome. It is their first time in the US, innit?' 'Yes, it is. But still some time till then.' While talking the 'Beauty and the Beast' have arrived at the car, and CGY dropped the luggage in the boot, while Rin sat on the passenger seat. And so Cal drove Rin and himself home to Mulberry Street to their appartement.

so it is a Morevaldsson then?

I feel slightly cheated... as an avid bird watcher I came for the tits, but none to be found...

graphic courtesy by Leandrofg (stats for Janser, stats for Kagamine) Dick Hammer was able to get a hold of the very busy, Americans alternate captain to get some statements from the young Swiss. DH: 'Hi Callum, thanks for agreeing to talk to us.' CGY: 'Anytime, Dick.' DH: 'Let's start with the elephant in the room. Team Western Europe did not do so well in the WC. Are you disappointed?' CGY: 'I mean nobody likes losing. Alas, we were a relatively young team and had to face the best the VHL has to offer. We gave our best, which in this case was not good enough. We paid a tuition fee so to speak to get better for the next time around in two years' time.' DH: 'At the moment you are still involved in the ProAm tournament with the Birmingham Dragons, who are second in the standing. You are sporting a 'bad boy' image there, contending for the undisputed heavyweight championship and collect a lot of penalties. Your closest adversary for the meanest SOB is Fradin 'Lumberjack' McGryer. Any words for that?' CGY: 'It is all in good fun. We all know that we earn our pay playing hockey and nobody gets hurt. It is a fun tournament, after all.' DH: 'How does it feel to defend against your HOF dad? Do you have an advantage as you know him?' CGY: 'I wish. The dude has still some aces up his sleeves. Maybe players who played against him back in the days have a better chance to stop him than me. I may also be tied back subconsciously, as I was raised to respect my elders.' DH: 'Speaking of which. How was your upbringing in a VHL-Superstar household?' CGY: 'To be honest, I did not realize that dad was such a big number. I just attributed it as part of being in a very successful team. And the other team members and the brass of Calgary were more like family than working colleague. That was just the way the Wranglers ticked and still tick to this day. Padrino Gonzo took over the reins from Kris and he strives to have the same family vibe in the organisation as his predecessor.' DH: 'Have you followed Rice's moves since he stepped down as GM of the Wranglers?' CGY: 'Of course. I consider him family. I was winding him up when he returned to Miami where his GM career started. Asked him whether he gave up on hockey and retired to play more golf.' DH: 'How was it growing up a millionaire's son?' CGY: 'Well, my parents did not go crazy on the spending. You see, if you take the stereotypical Swiss and the stereotypical Scot, you get the probably most tightfisted person on the planet.' He laughs. 'To be fair, they never penny pinched on anything related to education. But if I wanted a new bicycle, I only got it for birthdays or Christmas. Or when I was a teenager, I could do the odd job during the summer holidays to contribute to acquisitions not considered vital by my parents.' DH: 'So you were a blue collared son of a millionaire?' CGY: 'You could say that. My parents taught me discipline and a good work ethic amongst many other things. They showed me, that nothing comes for free and that one has to work to get what they want. As I said, I did not struggle for tuition fees. But if I wanted to go clubbing or partying during my time at uni, I had to finance that myself. It made me appreciate money and how long the majority of people need to work to be able to afford stuff.' DH: 'Switching from the past to the future. How do you see the Americans faring in the coming season.' CGY: 'Due to Mr Wong's activity in the offseason, we were able to replace retired Ducky with Jeb, without trading away too much of our future. And with our prospects Gretzky and Reynolds, we should be able to replace Vinny and Freddy, who are in the autumn of their career. I think we should be in contention for a playoff spot. After that, anything can happen.' DH: 'Okay that's it for me. Thanks for your time.' CGY: 'Fuggedabowdit.' CGY's stats for the Western Europe in the WC read as follows: Round Robin: 10gp, 1g, 5a, 6pts, +1, 22 PIM, 23 hits, 17sb, no fights Quarter Final: 1gp, 0g, 0a, 0pt, -2, 2 PIM, 3 hits, 1sb, no fights And here the statline so far for the ProAm: 40gp, 5g, 30a, 35pts, +5, 89 PIM, 85 hits, 87sb, 5ppg, 1 gwg, 1 First Star nomination, 3-0-3 Fighting record (W/L/T) Stay tuned for further updates. https://vhlforum.com/topic/144188-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xv-first-games-as-a-murican/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/144581-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xvi-one-third-in/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145143-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xvii-a-seasons-review/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145455-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xix-a-rookie-season-interview/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145648-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xx-he-is-in-the-army-now/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/146035-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xxi-a-busy-offseason/ 779 words

because TPE

and none of them thumbs

or maybe the additional A's on your Jersey come from ItAliA

CGY Janser almost did it, came second in the VHLM draft behind the 'Muscles from Brussels' Didier Verhault @FTK.

It is and it isn't... back in S86, I had two number one goalies in the now defunct Istanbul Red Wolves. It is a luxury problem to have a 1a and a 1b netminder. Because no matter what you do, a nominal starting goaltender does not get the starts he/she deserves. If I recall correctly, around the TDL, I shipped the less performing goalie to another team in dire need of a decent goalkeeper. Rask/Bezos were the goalies in question.

you know in German we call incapable/incompetent people 'a bottle'... For example: 'What is the net worth of Bayern Munich's team this season?' Reply: 'It is exactly EUR 2,75.' 'Why?' 'Because that is the deposit for 11 bottles.' not saying that is Soju's fate, I just had a chuckle when I saw the graphic.

Permanently, judging by his prospect scouting records and his physique. WB Tet.

My I suggest an Irish whiskey?

Surely, you can't be serious.

Now you made Ahma and me angry

and get roasted you mean?

Has anybody told Jokinen that the two extra A's come from ScAndinAvia?

1. What advice do you have for our freshly drafted Young Bucks? If you are one of the draftees what do you wish to tell your team mates? 2. Calgary needs to bolster its roster. If cap wasn't an issue, which player would you sign and why? 3. Last season we lost as best NA team against the Legion who needed to go via the wild card round. What do we need to do, to not repeat an early out in the post-season? 4. Do you pay attention to mock drafts? Why/Why not? 5. Which is the saddest NHL franchise and why is it the Maple Leafs? 6. What was the most remarkable hockey-related event in your life so far?

uncapped 1/5

The only time CGY ever goes into the officer's mess in the Andermatt barracks is when there are VHL events on the telly late night. As the grunts have a curfew at 2200, but officers do not. So he went to the deserted mess and helped himself to a stubby from the kitchen, dropping the cash in the respective box and switched on the life transmission of the draft, wondering who will be his future team mates. At 11th overall, the Americans drafted US winger Chris Reynolds Jr. Talented, but with a deficit on displacement, the prospect looks like he has the potential for a solid two-way forward. Reynolds' dad was a Warsaw lifer with over a point per game pace and a cup ring to his name. Not only that, the old man had his jersey retired by the Predators. So Jr. has a heritage not unlike Janser himself and the latter is looking forward to play with Chris. Due to trades in the past, this was all the drafting the Americans were able to do in this deep draft. Alas, they have their core set for a couple of seasons, with only three players being due for retirement in the foreseeable future. Certainly a surmountable task for veteran GM Vince Wong.

graphic courtesy by Leandrofg (stats for Janser, stats for Kagamine) Our intrepid VHL hockey export has a full schedule in this off-season. Not only is he competing in the ProAm for the leading Birmingham Dragons, he also serves four weeks in the Swiss army as the captain of a alpine warfare special unit, both of which were planned events. No, shortly after midnight, lying in a foxhole next to a portable 6cm portable mortar, his radio operator came along with an urgent call. 'What is it PFC Meier? Has HQ changed their mind again about nighttime support fire?' 'No, Captain, it is a certain Vince Wong, wishing to speak to you, sir.' 'I swear, Meier if this is a prank, I have you stand guard and salute the flagpole until your arm falls off.' 'Sir, I'd never. The signal was clear and I even asked the person to spell their name to avoid any mistakes.' 'Okay, then give me the damn receiver, I am kind of busy here. And Corporal Betschart, don't you dare to lob a grenade until you get my word.' 'Sir, yessir.' 'This is Captain Janser, who's there?' 'Hi Callum, this is Vince Wong. Do you have a minute to discuss a potential contract extension?' 'Mr Wong. Nice to hear from you. Alas, we need to make haste as we are blocking a vital frequency.' Just in this moment, Team Red opened fire and the conversation got drowned in the ensuing ruckus. 'Cal, we wanted to extend for the next five years, as we see you as one of our franchise cornerstone for the future.' The Calgary native screamed into the receiver: 'Five?' Betschart misunderstood this exclamation as 'Fire' and let loose. 'Mr Wong I need to call you back, we are in the middle of an exercise.' 'Well, Betschart the cat is out of the bag now. I want barrel two, four and six firing one salvo of illumination grenades, so our lads can see something. One, three and five will fire HE. After the initial salvo, everyone switches to HE, one minute open fire at their own pace. Thereafter,suppressive fire in order five, two, three, six, one and four, every 30 seconds, with ten seconds intervall between the individual barrels. Co-ordinate elevation and azimut with the forward observation post and adjust fire accordingly.' 'Sir, yessir.' After the not-so-gentle giant returned to the barracks following a successful night exercise, he lead by example ond took care of his gun first, then a shower and shave, followed by breakfast in the soldiers' mess. He never eats in the officer's mess as he likes to be in touch with his company. After all, if the shit hits the fan, these will be the people he will rely on to accomplish whatever mission is put in front of them. So he makes sure to understand his men and make them understand him. No rest for the wicked, as paper work needs to be done, and to make his day complete he is also officer of the day. He had barely enough time to get in touch with NYA brass and extend his contract. He was just considering to get a little shut eye (and of course announce where he will be found in case of need) when his mobile phone rang with an unknown caller ID. 'Janser' he answered with less than the normal enthusiasm. If this is again a call whether he wants to extend a warranty of his non-existant car he will let them have it this time. But it was Frank Chadwick, who took the reins of Team Western Europe. 'Hey Callum, this is Chadwick. I assemble a team to represent Western Europe and I want you for the roster. Are you willing to play in the oncoming World Cup?' 'This comes unexpected, as I did not think to be good enough to play in the WC yet.' 'So, is this a 'no'?' 'Of course it is not. It is a great honour to be nominated for such a team and I will gladly accept the nomination.' When he later on saw the published roster for Western Europe, he was overjoyed that French and Jasper were nominated as well. So something did notice that NYA was not all bad last season. We will report on Janser's off season adventures in the near future. Stay tuned. https://vhlforum.com/topic/143547-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xiv-another-title/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/144188-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xv-first-games-as-a-murican/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/144581-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xvi-one-third-in/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145143-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xvii-a-seasons-review/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145455-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xix-a-rookie-season-interview/ https://vhlforum.com/topic/145648-the-cgy-janser-story-part-xx-he-is-in-the-army-now/