David O'Quinn 115 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 (edited) This took... *forever* to gather. Mostly because i'm an inefficient bitch. Season Team Name Record GF GA DIFF S20 New York Americans 10-59-3 230 492 -262 S21 New York Americans 7-63-2 224 463 -239 S22 Vasteras Iron Eagles 22-48-2 155 244 -89 S23 Seattle Bears 9-58-5 118 336 -218 S24 Seattle Bears 9-58-5 142 295 -153 S25 Calgary Wranglers 10-61-1 133 348 -215 S26 HC Davos Dynamo 9-60-3 145 374 -229 S27 Toronto Legion 8-58-7 138 308 -170 S28 Vasteras Iron Eagles 8-58-6 161 378 -217 S29 Helsinki Titans 19-46-7 156 252 -96 S30 RIga Reign 18-47-7 152 262 -110 S31 Toronto Legion 10-57-5 132 310 -178 S32 Seattle Bears 9-61-2 115 313 -198 S33 Vasteras Iron Eagles 7-58-7 108 310 -202 S34 HC Davos Dynamo 9-60-3 118 303 -185 S35 Riga Reign 5-62-2 83 314 -231 S36 Calgary Wranglers 6-65-1 88 357 -269 S37 Helsinki Titans 6-63-3 118 329 -211 S38 Quebec City Meute 8-58-6 131 314 -183 S39 Toronto Legion 13-55-4 107 242 -135 S39 Quebec City Meute 13-55-4 135 244 -109 S40 Missing Missing N/A N/A S41 Stockholm Vikings 10-53-9 135 273 -138 S42 Riga Reign 11-56-5 131 287 -156 S43 Calgary Wranglers 15-53-4 102 236 -134 S44 Helsinki Titans 10-55-7 141 314 -173 S45 Seattle Bears 11-58-3 137 324 -187 S46 Seattle Bears 4-61-7 116 299 -183 S47 Quebec City Meute 15-48-9 128 235 -107 S48 Riga Reign 15-50-7 107 208 -101 S49 Calgary Wranglers 9-57-6 87 264 -177 S50 Stockholm Vikings 11-56-5 83 231 -148 S51 Stockholm Vikings 6-60-6 68 246 -178 S52 Helsinki Titans 9-57-6 142 352 -210 S53 HC Davos Dynamo 12-52-8 82 244 -162 S54 Seattle Bears 11-49-12 69 210 -141 S55 Cologne Express 8-60-4 76 307 -231 S56 New York Americans 7-59-6 62 295 -233 S57 Stockholm Vikings 4-63-5 62 285 -223 S58 HC Davos Dynamo 10-56-6 99 249 -150 S59 Quebec City Meute 6-61-5 102 282 -180 S60 Toronto Legion 4-67-1 97 301 -204 S61 Seattle Bears 11-57-4 105 261 -156 S62 Helsinki Titans 8-55-9 114 300 -186 S63 HC Davos Dynamo 15-53-4 132 289 -157 S64 HC Davos Dynamo 16-50-6 135 246 -111 S65 Moscow Menace 9-56-7 155 332 -177 S66 Seattle Bears 23-40-9 182 261 -79 S67 New York Americans 20-35-7 193 282 -89 So, there it is. The WORST teams in the VHL, year by year. The award for 'Best of the Worst' goes to the S66 Seattle Bears, followed by a tie for the #2 spot between the S67 New York Americans and the S22 Vasteras Iron Eagles. The best worst team in VHL history by the advent of pure points is still the Seattle Bears of S66. The award for 'Worst of the Worst' in goal differential goes to the S36 Calgary Wranglers, who had an abysmal DIFF of -269. The actual award for worst team in the entire VHL since S20 goes to the S60 Toronto legion, with a record of 4-67-1... It is said, in legend, that they would not have even made the VHLM playoffs that year. The best player on their team was Luca Volkov, with an OVA of 69. For reference, the worst team in the league this year, the New York Americans, have four players at or above that OVA. That's not good. Also, for your memertainment, the list of 'how many times have you been the worst' Seattle Bears: 8 HC Davos Dynamo: 6 Helsinki Titans: 5 New York Americans: 4 Calgary Wranglers: 4 Toronto Legion: 4 Riga Reign: 4 Quebec Meute: 4 Stockholm Vikings: 4 Vasteras Iron Eagles: 3 Cologne Express: 1 Moscow Menace: 1 Congratulations, Seattle, your team has consistently been the worst, of the worst! Throughout the years, your team has sucked, and sucked, and sucked more than any other suckers. Succ. So what lesson is there to be learned here? Well, there really isn't. Throughout the years, tanking has been a successful tactic. There isn't any price that is too high for the cup, and if you spend everything you have to win the cup, and end up down the shitter for the next half decade, one could very easily argue it was all worth it. We're only on this earth for so long, and you likely want, and definitely need to accomplish as much as you can with the short time you have. So to all the general managers out there: Lose as much as you want, as long as you have a plan to take the league by storm and win a cup, who cares how bad you are right now. Fuck the critics. And to all the players, don't get demotivated if you're on a crappy team. Talk to your GM, find out their plan, and find out if you wanna stick around for it to work or move on. But there's always something you can do as a player too, and who knows, your team may just pull a Continental Cup out of it's ass. 823 Words, 450 without all the stats (but I figured the stats counted for.. something.) Bonus 6 uncapped TPE for the theme week. Edit: Added relevant meme. Edited October 17, 2019 by JohnOQuinn DollarAndADream, Elmebeck and gorlab 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gustav 6,184 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 HERE WE GO AGAIN BOIS @Acydburn you're a shit GM David O'Quinn 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berocka 2,227 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 In before drama, oh wait @GustavMattias started it already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O'Quinn 115 Posted October 17, 2019 Author Share Posted October 17, 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayzor_7 741 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 @Banackock Shit GM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banackock 7,785 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 4 minutes ago, Rayzor_7 said: @Banackock Shit GM Because Shit goalie Berocka and DoktorFunk 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banackock 7,785 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 6 minutes ago, Rayzor_7 said: @Banackock Shit GM also only 3/20 that’s preet good }BanADV VAN LETS FUCK GOIN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheLastOlympian07 2,388 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 @HulkHogan @Banackock i aint lying when I say Seattle sucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banackock 7,785 Posted October 17, 2019 Share Posted October 17, 2019 6 minutes ago, TheLastOlympian07 said: @HulkHogan @Banackock i aint lying when I say Seattle sucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoktorFunk 810 Posted October 18, 2019 Share Posted October 18, 2019 inb4 new Seattle Overlords takeover Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KC15 340 Posted October 18, 2019 Share Posted October 18, 2019 Review: Full credit for the amount of work this took to put together and definitely deserving of the double TPE for history theme. But as an article, not as interesting. If you are going to make a point that it is worth tanking to win a cup, it would be more interesting to track one or more of these teams to see if they ended up here because of a Cup run or rose from here to do the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O'Quinn 115 Posted October 20, 2019 Author Share Posted October 20, 2019 On 10/18/2019 at 8:03 PM, KC15 said: Review: Full credit for the amount of work this took to put together and definitely deserving of the double TPE for history theme. But as an article, not as interesting. If you are going to make a point that it is worth tanking to win a cup, it would be more interesting to track one or more of these teams to see if they ended up here because of a Cup run or rose from here to do the same. The problem lies in that I already did a few history-themed media spots, and was not informed about the theme week coming up, so I sorta ran out of ideas and history-steam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KC15 340 Posted October 20, 2019 Share Posted October 20, 2019 1 hour ago, JohnOQuinn said: The problem lies in that I already did a few history-themed media spots, and was not informed about the theme week coming up, so I sorta ran out of ideas and history-steam Fair enough! David O'Quinn 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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