Re: Politics in the Workplace / Socialplace

[bigAL 2,176]

I feel like I have to say something after the mess that was the VHLM last night. I'm a teacher, a community-builder, and a compromise-finder. I know everyone involved in this league thinks of themselves as a good, rational, smart, and well-meaning person. I'm not here to dispute any of that. The humanity, acceptance, and enjoyment you've all shown me in the past few months as I've been here has been tremendous.

 

However, we do need to stop being dicks to each other. Here, there, and everywhere in the world.

 

The discussions that have been happening in #politics this week always starts respectfully but devolves into defensive anger and a digging in of both sides after each side has said all their points. That’s not helpful.

 

It doesn’t have to be. I hear everyone saying the same things.

 

I hear people donating on the forum and arguing that ALL LIVES MATTER on the discord. I see people conflating the current issues faced by black North Americans with the experiences of other minorities from other parts of the world. I see lots of whataboutism: “what about Muslims after 9/11? Or Jews in the holocaust??”
 

These are all fine things to say as long as you’re coming at out from a place of respect for the debate, respect for the other people involved, and respect for the messiness of the world.

 

The argument that ALL LIVES MATTER isn’t helpful right now. It’s true, all lives DO matter, but there’s only one issue on the table right now and it’s BLACK LIVES. It’s the old expression of equality and equity: all types of lives matter equally, which means that some will need an extra boost in order to make it to “equal”.

 

 

Right now, most of us can see over that fence. We don’t fear for our lives when we make a mistake, like speeding or shoplifting. We weren’t born into poverty, and we can easily imagine a day when we’re happy, healthy, and wealthy. We don’t have to debate politics because issues of governance, law enforcement, and health care don’t usually negatively impact us in our daily lives. To stick with the analogy above, we can see the baseball game. Maybe not perfectly, maybe our fav team is losing, maybe the suns in our eyes, but we can see the baseball game.

Right now, across America, across North America, and across the world, a whole lot of people are saying they can’t see the baseball game. They’re saying they haven’t been able to see the baseball game in a long time. They’re saying that this covid pandemic has actually moved them into the parking lot, when all they want is to see the damn baseball game.

If someone says they can’t see the baseball game, listen to them. Figure out how you can get them a box to stand on. Give them your box. Don’t tell them to suck it up and watch the highlights later. Don’t tell them that baseball sucks anyways. Don’t tell them that there’s lots of starving kids in Africa who don’t even know baseball exists.

Lots and lots and lots and lots of people in our social bubble are stepping out of their lane for the first time because of this incident. NHL players are notoriously bland and apolitical, but there have been some excellent words said by the pros this week that show they are open to learning about and listening to people who have had different lives than us.

That’s what this big blowup has all been about. It’s not about the nitty gritty of “this protestor did a bad thing!” or “not all cops” or “not all protestors”. The problem of the discord lately is that people are choosing to use their platform to say “I don’t care”. Again, that’s fine - if you can see the baseball game, you don’t have to care when others can’t see it. Caring is hard emotional work and I wish I could care less.

But you don’t need to be kicking the other people as they try to see over the fence. If all lives really mattered, you’d try to build up the people that need it right now, most clearly right in front of us. The time for everyone else’s injustices will come, but right now the single biggest demographic group in America is saying they are experiencing a problem and can’t see the baseball game. Don’t be a dick and say they aren’t.

Most of all, just don’t be a dick. Act in good faith. In public and when representing the VHL(M), support others or don’t say anything at all. When you want to have intellectual (instead of emotional) debates about politics, do it in a comfortable place where everyone involved knows you and understands that you do already respect the emotional situation others are experiencing. Show the same respect you say you have for all the people of the world to the one individual person you’re disagreeing with right now.

Just, don’t be a dick. There’s enough dicks in the world being dickish to many people. The VHL is our escape from the world. Don’t be a dick.

 

 

and everyone.

[Banackock 8,052]

That equality/equity picture is very interesting and definitely a good way to see things and such. I stood for all lives matter, as well as Black Lives Matter, but I really appreciate this post and it made me challenge my thought process with my original message. ALM is fine, but do not overshadow BLM. Sorry if the wording is poor.. I am agreeing with this post. 

 

Again, that picture was eye opening for me and put together some good sense. It was cool to see it displayed like that. Thank you for making this post @bigAL.

 

As you said, ✌+  To the world and all here. 

[Beketov 9,026]

Perfectly said @bigAL. I didn’t want to wake up this morning to a fire that needs to be put out. I didn’t wake up wanting to argue with people and dish out punishments and deal with drama. I’ll do it because that’s what the league needs to prosper but I don’t want the league to need that. I want to be able to focus on making the VHL better instead of trying to keep it afloat. Most days we’re very good at that. Most days we can coexist despite our differences and all come on here and enjoy ourselves. 
 

Last night was apparently not most days.

 

There are ways to have debates without devolving into drama. There are ways to have debates without devolving into personal attacks. Those things don’t make for debate, they make for fighting. I’m fine with debate, I’m not fine with fighting. What I woke up to wasn’t debate.

 

We all have the capacity to do better in the world, or at least not make things worse. I get that things can get heated, I’m guilty of it myself and the evidence is all over the forum if you know where to look. That doesn’t mean I’m not trying to do better though, it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all try to do better. We’ve literally raised over one thousand dollars in a day, that’s doing better and that’s the VHL I know.

 

Don’t just meme this and move on, do better. We all came to this site from different places with different experiences. Learn from each other and collectively improve things here. I joke that @Tate came around to the good side with time but it wasn’t just time, it was realizing that perhaps he needed to look at something from a different perspective and it helped him. We all want to make the VHL and the world a better place, at least I hope we all do. We can’t do that by being dicks.

 

Don’t be a dick.

[bigAL 2,176]

1 minute ago, Banackock said:

That equality/equity picture is very interesting and definitely a good way to see things and such. I stood for all lives matter, as well as Black Lives Matter, but I really appreciate this post and it made me challenge my thought process with my original message. ALM is fine, but do not overshadow BLM. Sorry if the wording is poor.. I am agreeing with this post. 

 

Again, that picture was eye opening for me and put together some good sense. It was cool to see it displayed like that. Thank you for making this post @bigAL.

 

As you said, ✌+  To the world and all here. 

Love you Bana.

 

Everyone is having a hard, hard time in 2020, from losing the lives we used to have, the danger of getting sick and dying at any second, the plans, hopes and dreams that have been brutally squashed, the freedom to do what we want and where we want, and the safety of having a town and country that isn't on fire. Everyone deals with the pain differently, but everyone is hurting all the same.

 

& to all, because we never fully understand the stories of the people around us

[mediocrepony 1,216]

Wait, what happened. Was it on Discord? Great article, @bigAL

Edited June 5, 2020 by GrittyIsKing09

[Mr_Hatter 1,608]

1 hour ago, GrittyIsKing09 said:

Wait, what happened. Was it on Discord? Great article, @bigAL

I have responded to this via DM

[Victor 10,946]

1 hour ago, GrittyIsKing09 said:

Wait, what happened. Was it on Discord? Great article, @bigAL

you're honestly having a much better time without Discord

[mediocrepony 1,216]

3 hours ago, Victor said:

you're honestly having a much better time without Discord

glad i'm  not on, now.

[Devise 4,475]

4 hours ago, Banackock said:

That equality/equity picture is very interesting and definitely a good way to see things and such. I stood for all lives matter, as well as Black Lives Matter, but I really appreciate this post and it made me challenge my thought process with my original message. ALM is fine, but do not overshadow BLM. Sorry if the wording is poor.. I am agreeing with this post. 

 

Again, that picture was eye opening for me and put together some good sense. It was cool to see it displayed like that. Thank you for making this post @bigAL.

 

As you said, ✌+  To the world and all here. 

 

Of your looking for another good one.

 

 

A huge thing that's been going on is seeing people use these reasoned arguments, such as AllLivesMatter to distract from and lessen the other movement. The bad faith people who do this know they are doing it. It's why reactions to earnest confusion can be harsh or dismissive. By engaging in the distraction tactics even if unintentionally we fuel that fire. 

 

It's why despite being able to say I agree with All Lives Matters arguments, I can still say I support BLM without question. Making it so anyone who is so petty to turn the topic into a semantics debate instead of having the ability to even stay silent and let BLM spread to speak and show the factual injustices going on turns the situation into everyone vs racists. If anyone can't support simply BLM having the spotlight during this chaotic time and seeing it spread triggers them into debating about anything else as a distraction, then yes there is some racial bias going on. We live in a world where the bad apples are bad faith actors. Where they know they can't really say they're beliefs because then it would be easy to separate them from the ignorant or uneducated. These troll esque micro aggressions are literally 4chan 101 in terms of weapon choice. Feint legitimate arguments to hide jabs and troll movements they disagree with. 

[mediocrepony 1,216]

12 minutes ago, Devise said:

 

 

 

 

 

This is awesome.

[Quik 4,113]

@bigAL I saw the notification for this yesterday, but as you can imagine, it ended up getting buried on my to do list as things continued to pile up. 
 

This was very well said, and I couldn’t agree more. At the end of the day, nobody is being asked to change the world on their own, or in a single day - that’s why I called our donation drive a small part, because no matter how much we manage to fundraise, and it’s been amazing to see just how much our community has come together and cares, it will not be the thing that solves racial injustice or inequality, but it will help those that are fighting for the right side, continue to do so. 
 

It’s just about being better today than you were yesterday, and being better tomorrow than you were today.