JardyB10

Thanks for stepping up you big loser. I’m looking forward to trying the new format.

Yes but only until October when the rest of the porn is banned or whatever.

JardyB10's VHL Member+ Award Ceremony Good evening ladies and gentlemen and everyone else of the VHL. My name is JardyB10, and welcome to the inaugural standalone JardyB10 VHL Member+ Awards! These awards are far more prestigious than the ones that are sanctioned and given out by the league, because they come from the heart - an organ that VHL award voters do not possess. Let us not dilly-dally any further, and let's get into the show! Best VHL Pet We're going to start off with what will likely end up being the biggest and most important category. I, like most people, am a big fan of domestic critters. Bless the VHL and its Discord for giving members a place to spam photos of their fuzzy friends, it is easily the best and most underused channel on that platform. I've given it a quick scan, and here are the nominees for the best pet in the VHL: Mozi the Oodly Looking Dog - @DMaximus Tiko the Husky - @Enorama Unknown named Golden Retriever - @Ledge and Dairy All of these sweet boys and girls, and those not nominated, are cute as fuck and I love them. However, one stands out among the rest by virtue of being an awesome dude and having an owner who knows what the heck is up. The award for best VHL Pet goes to....... TIKO THE HUSKY! What a wonderful breed. What a personality. Makes me smile every time. Easy winner of best VHL Pet. The Biggest Dumbest Piece of Shit Award This might be a bit of a controversial category because it's also a very competitive one! The league is chock full of big dumb pieces of shit (including yours truly), and you could make a compelling argument for any single member to receive this prestigious award. It wasn't easy to narrow it down to three nominees, but I'm giving it my best shot: @Frank: Is he one of the league greatest graphical talents? Yes. Is he a super chill dude who makes both the league and teams he's on better? Arguable, but sure. However, is he a stinky young ginger boy who always has edgy television characters as his avatar? Absolutely. For these reasons, he's a big dumb piece of shit. @Zetterberg: The very definition of a member who has truly done nothing wrong except seem to be reasonably okay with me being unreasonably mean to him in my podcasts. I retired the bit in audio format, but I said nothing about the written word. For this reason, he is a big dumb piece of shit. @Beketov: Robert's sins are numerous. For starters, he's the first player/member to be banned and punished hard for being a big cheater. His experience in these matters made him the perfect fit to take over simulating our league games, as that job is generally reserved for the most rotten of riggers available. Finally, as one of the head honchos of the VHL, truly every single league decision that is made will be disliked by at least someone. If that isn't big dumb piece of shit behaviour, I don't know what is. Which of these three pieces of shit are the biggest and the dumbest though? Allow me to open the envelope...... IT'S FRANK! He's rotten to the roots, having been recruited by DGFX or some shithead like that, and the aura of soullessness he brings to the table is unmatched by any Blue Team or esteemed recruiter. Congratulations Frankwick, you've truly earned this! Most Inactive Here we have our final competitive category of the evening! For every active member we have here in the VHL, we likely have 10+ inactive members. Some of these members haven't even made a single post. Others have only made a single post. The voting for this award was raw and angry, so we needed FOUR nominees instead of the traditional three. @gorlab: Another one of the league's most prestigious graphical talents, gorlab can throw fades both in Photoshop and in real life. The players that have come from his agency are some of the most electric the league has ever seen, but his time here hasn't been without controversy. Relatively recently, one such controversy went so awry that gorlab decided to hang up his proverbial skates indefinitely, likely to set up shop at the local Fuddruckers. @Will: Had William Donald Draper still been active, he would have given Frank a real run for the BDPoS Award. As it stands, Will is truly one of the most inactive members available. As far as I know, he doesn't even have a player in the league right now, though if he does, he is truly awful. Will can be poorly counted on to update the forum sometimes, as well as embezzle league donations into his drug fund. @Beaviss: Yet another former commissioner who cracked under the formidable and thankless weight of the job and mercifully fled from the league. I did not have a ton of overlapped time with the young Beav, but I have heard many comparisons between him and I. Which tells me that he is in fact prodigal at being inactive, and everyone is better for it! @hylands: One of the most popular inactives today. Despite GMing a team in the league and being a consistently strong earner of those TPs, he is undoubtedly extremely inactive. The fact he has yet to be fired and banned is yet another reason Beketov earned a BDPoS nomination. A hearty crop of inactive members with scrub players! The one who stands out above the rest is none other than... BEAVISS! When Butthead told Beavis to "settle down," he took those words to heart. He is a man we will never see again, and I respect him for it. Best VHL Team IT'S THE DAVOS DYNAMO! That concludes the JardyB10 VHL Member+ Award Ceremony! I would like to thank everyone for coming out tonight, and hope you all enjoyed your weekend. Have a good night! ~1000 words.

Liar Also this isn't THEME WEEKED

I'm certain most or all of these ideas have been said, and I'd elaborate a bunch but I've had a busy week and even now I am so so tired. 1. I know Phil and others have said this, but let's bring back some version of the Mentorship program. Throughout my Welcome Wagon portion of my podcast I've been really noticing how many people join and create a player and are either incredibly confused or never get past that point. Perhaps we could implement a checkbox to the player creation page asking if the member would like a mentor. Or perhaps there should be a big obvious location with a "How to do all this shit" video. I know there's lot of resources in place to help new people along, but it seems like we need to do more. 2. Player Store Additions/Revamp - I wonder if we can come up with more creative ways to spend player store money. I have a psychotic idea where players could have the option of putting some of their player salary away into a "Member Savings" bank where they can purchase a different pool of general things. Some of these could be extremely expensive options (moreso than anything currently available), like upgrading your welfare, or purchasing one of the VHL franchises. Piggybacking off that, perhaps we can find a way to utilize the macro-finance/team economics that are available via STHS. So if a member spends $100M buying the Toronto Legion, maybe they can make some of that back through success and attendance of their team. They can be the ones in charge of hiring GMs and shit. Etc. Etc. Like I said, psychotic, but it seems intriguing. 3. Forum Games/Competitions - Again, I know this has been posted multiple times, but I do like the idea of more league sanctioned activities, perhaps worth TPE. Whether this is a movie/game night (Jackbox perhaps), or even something like the chess tournament, or Haxball tournaments, or even stupid League of Legends events that Discord nerds kind of already do. A more league official stance might be cute and fun.

Tbh I feel like we originally went with Watchmen cuz it sounded cool and the OG logo was a dude’s head. Then someone made a cool looking lighthouse and here we are. It’s good to know the Frostbeard found some lore on it retroactively though!

When I was staying there it was on the SK side. But I’d shop on the AB side because they don’t have provincial tax.

Now it’s a utopia for rig pigs! Sobriety not included.

You’re saying I’m fit to train teachers??? That checks out!

*LISTENER DISCRETION ADVISED* I honestly don't swear too too much in this one I don't think. https://anchor.fm/jardy-b/episodes/The-Chodesode-17-Driving-to-Suggestion-Town-e16478n Whale hello there! This week I discuss: - Many personal details - Teasing the Hecking Podcast #6 - Going over my likely suggestions for the suggestion drive - Player Store things - Forum games - Mentorship program Mentions: @Yeeter @Zetterberg @frescoelmo @Phil Casual Mentions: @bigAL @Ahma

1. This week is THEME WEEK! And the topic is VHL Awards. Our topic can sometimes be controversial--do you think the blue team picked out a fun one this week? Why or why not? I think any topic can be fun, even if it's objectively not that good. The onus is on the member to make it good! As for this topic, I think it's a little bit down the middle. Lots of opportunity for some samey takes, but wiggle room to make some good interesting media. 2. Speaking of VHL Awards and theme week, have you done a point task on the topic this week (or do you plan to)? If so, what's it about? I haven't yet, but I'll be doing a Podcast of course on the topic. Kind of undecided, maybe on the trophy name origins, or maybe a member award ceremony. 3. We've been losing in overtime quite a bit lately. What do you think other teams are doing differently to keep their composure after regulation? Shooting the puck at the net more. 4. Another opportunity for some extra earning came this week when the commissioners asked us for our suggestions on making the league better. Whether or not you've commented in the thread, what's something you'd like to see the league do to improve itself? Anything regarding member retention and mentorship. Pretty much everyone is overwhelmed and confused at first, and I think we could do a better job of integrating them into the league. 5. More on the topic of suggestions, one of mine was to formally rework how press conferences are done--instead of being asked six questions and answering them all and having to wait for questions to go up every week, my idea was to have every post consist of three answers to previous questions and three questions to be answered by someone else, making it so anyone could do a press conference at any time and everyone interacts with someone different every week. This is something we could do informally as well--would you like us to try it, or are you happy with how things are now? I think that would be a great fun idea that we could well experiment with! It's perhaps not as clicker friendly, but those folks could still just jack 6 questions and answer them and the REAL MEMBERS could do it properly. 6. Time for a third question about the suggestion thread--go to the thread (here's the link again, also in question 4) and find a suggestion you like. What is it and who made it? Don't be afraid to tag the author for some positive recognition. I LITERALLY TALKED ABOUT ALL THIS STUFF IN MY PODCAST GUS. I'll go with what I said there too, I liked @frescoelmo's idea of doing more to facilitate weekly games or some such among the members. We used to have great times playing Haxball and the Swedish Armed Forces Team Test, I think a league sanctioned game night/week/whatever, maybe even involving TPE, would be neat.

Damn commies

Sure would be cool if no one except @Tate applied, you fucking pathetic excuses for VHL members.

Well that is my nightmare. I will fix.

VHL members’ pets tier list, as based on Puppers Spam or whatever. Would be a good opportunity for spicy hot takes

This is unreal 3.5/10

I’m just trying to live up to your image!

The extra points for the podcast are nice, but it actually never ends up making a difference to me because I get my 6+3 for the podcasts, then 2 for Press Conferences, and then I end up getting the last point either through trivia or VHL.com anyway, so there’s always a point that gets shaved off at the cap. Also @Phil has the worst personality of anyone so you have nothing to worry about there.

I’m IN the BOG, not ON it. Otherwise I’d have to take the duties more seriously and stuff like that, which sounds like a hassle. I’m really just a regular member with too much freedom of the board, because who can say no to this face??

I’m generally a big proponent of switching things up and doing new things, both in the VHL and in life! I box myself into podcasts because they fit into my schedule a lot easier and I have fun doing them, but I used to be exclusively a Media Spot guy. You hit the nail on the head in this podcast, never be afraid to think outside of the box in this league!

I'll tag the blues and bogs because I'm a little shit like that. @Commissioner @BOG

Historically activity takes a bit of a dip in the summer months, and I can see that being amplified by the re-opening after a pandemic. Could also be a general comfort/complacency! I've never been able to zero in on how to effectively promote forum activity. It may just be a matter of individuals making a point of engaging other individuals, or groups of them.

I used a lot of spaces to credit the sigs but I fear it looks fucked on any monitor that isn't mine. OR DOES IT??

*LISTENER DISCRETION ADVISED* For all you new folks out there, I have a rather foul mouth. https://anchor.fm/jardy-b/episodes/The-Chodesode-16-The-YouTube-Recruits-and-Co-e15vtok In this week's episode (recorded on Friday and Saturday), I pretty much only talk about the new members from the last nearly 2 weeks. Mentions: @BITBYBIT21 @Greg Ernest @EdwardTheSniper @Thrash94 @Thrash94Gaming @LJFalcon15 @JayJay1227 @Jamomayo @WereBuzzing @TreLow315 @Jaxon Seltenrich @Austin18 @wavezZ @Moon_50 @RiddleMeSkjei @KRONWALLED @yvuu232 @ViprVipe

Why you gotta be like that @Eso?