hylands

1. If you were Bratislava GM, which area of the team would you look to strengthen in a trade, and why?
Ex-AGM (not you, hylands). dylan is quite mean to me.
 
2. There has been basically no trade activity around the league, why do you think that is?
Probably a touch lower overall activity, plus I think the standings show there are pretty distinctly competitive vs non-competitive teams, so I guess there isn't much marginal benefit to be gained from teams with few resources and poor standings.
 
3. For those of you that have been VHL drafted, which team will you be graduating to, and are you excited? For the moths that haven't been drafted, do you have a preference or any hopes for the eventual VHL draft?
Wherever Sunset goes. Preferably somewhere good, but McWolf and I have been on the same team only sparingly for our entire existences :[
 
4. Are you at all interested in becoming a GM in one of the leagues? Or have you had past GM experience?
NOPE. I GMed a successful team in the EFL for several seasons and I'm good with just having that experience.
 
5. Can you recommend me an awesome band that I've probably never heard of?
I don't know what bands you know! I love Sammy Rae and the Friends, Lawrence, and Couch. Does that help?
 
6. If you were in charge of taking the team out to dinner, what kind of restaurant are you taking us to?
Thai food. Everyone loves thai food.

another season is almost in the books, and again i find myself asking where has the time gone? it seems like just yesterday jebediah big ol doinks in amish was lacing up the skates for his very first game in bratislava and the vhle. it's been a pretty consistent season from jeb's side of things. some steady improvement has been seen, and he has been rewarded with a decent haul of points. with 52 points in 66 games, he looks set to break his previous record of 56 points. being my first proper defenceman, i really didn't know what to expect long term for my player.
 
at first it was kind of disappointing not seeing all the points start to pile up, but i think the whole league has seen a drop in scoring compared to what i was used to pre hybrid attributes. on top of that, this has been by far the most competitive season in the vhle which i think has lead to a bit of a drop in scoring. big doinks is currently 3rd amongst defencemen for points, so i can't be upset! maybe he can go on a bit of a streak and take 2nd.

The Watchmen have been up and down for the season! We were on the cusp of falling out of the playoffs only 15 games ago and now we are primed to clinch, only needing one point difference from Stockholm to secure it. The team has significantly evolved in the past couple of weeks, with Harry Callahan stepping up into a major scoring role as he takes over the lead in goals and closes in on 40 total. Harry Callahan's remarkable performance has undoubtedly been the driving force behind our recent resurgence, and his dedication to the team's success is truly inspiring. We can't talk about our offence without considering the other half of our dynamic duo! Otis Boudreaux Jr has climbed his own mountain to tie the league point scorers with 76. He sits in second with assists in the league, a significant step down from Pope Francis. I ran out of words for this week so you'll have to tune in next time for my talk about our defense and goalie standouts!

We've featured your graphic on the VHL IG and Threads account today 🔥
 
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CxZw29ouRY5/?igshid=MWZjMTM2ODFkZg==
 

and I was the werewolf the whole time

@Garsh

1. I'd likely look to add more scoring up front. The blueline is developing well, and the goalies have been phenomenal all season long, but we're still not in the same realm offensively as the higher scoring teams in the league.
 
2. I think that it's a tough league to trade in because it's almost pure rentals everywhere with players only being in the E for a year or 2. I'm not sure that anybody in the league is fully sure of what their team is yet either, which is a product of the parity in the league at the moment. Most of the teams have had good runs move them up the standings and bad runs move them down so far.
 
3. I got drafted by the Toronto Legion, who are having a great season at the moment after loading up for a run this year. I'm excited for my first VHL action to come at some point, and hope to be able to contribute at the next level.
 
4. I would like to do it at some point when the timing is right. Would probably want some AGM experience first before making that jump in responsibility.
 
5. I never know how to answer these ones, just because I never know if the bands I listen to are popular or not. Here are some of my favourites, even though people probably know who all of them are already - Newer Music: Rise Against, Arkells, Glorious Sons, Evanescence, Three Days Grace, The Trews, Barenaked Ladies - Older Music: Poison, Eagles, Styx, Def Leppard, Garth Brooks, Brooks and Dunn, Supertramp, Diamond Rio.
 
6. Definitely a sports bar. I fully expect it to be a loud and chatty night with everybody knowing how the locker room can get. Plenty of wings and apps to go around for everybody, with something fun to watch on the tv!

Bratislava Watchmen Press Conference
Week Ending 9/24
trade deadline edition!
 
1. If you were Bratislava GM, which area of the team would you look to strengthen in a trade, and why?
2. There has been basically no trade activity around the league, why do you think that is?
3. For those of you that have been VHL drafted, which team will you be graduating to, and are you excited? For the moths that haven't been drafted, do you have a preference or any hopes for the eventual VHL draft?
4. Are you at all interested in becoming a GM in one of the leagues? Or have you had past GM experience?
5. Can you recommend me an awesome band that I've probably never heard of?
6. If you were in charge of taking the team out to dinner, what kind of restaurant are you taking us to?

@Garsh

@Garsh

@Garsh

Player Information
Username: Dil
Player Name: Rainbow Colours
Recruited From: Returning
Age: 50
Position: C
Height: 69 in.
Weight: 169 lbs.
Birthplace: Sweden
 
Player Page
 
@VHLM GM

i completely forgot to cap out on tpe last week with my .com article and surprisingly, i'm not bothered by it. in my first stint here in the vhl, once i became aware of all the various ways of earning tpe i dove right in head first. of course a lot of that had to do with the immense enthusiasm of enjoying a new hobby, but it became more than that. i was obsessed with capping out every week. there was nothing that could stop me from getting that oh so glorious 12 weekly tpe. it carried on throughout my first player's career, and bled into the next. believe it or not i was neck and neck with spartan for the entire time i was active on that player, and the unspoken competition between us kept me going just that little bit more. but i burnt out, and spartan went on to break the tpe record lmao. i'm not sure what that eventual break from the vhl did to me, but i don't feel that need to earn tpe even if i'm not in the mood to do all of the tasks. and that's ok.

i completely forgot to cap out on tpe last week with my .com article and surprisingly, i'm not bothered by it. in my first stint here in the vhl, once i became aware of all the various ways of earning tpe i dove right in head first. of course a lot of that had to do with the immense enthusiasm of enjoying a new hobby, but it became more than that. i was obsessed with capping out every week. there was nothing that could stop me from getting that oh so glorious 12 weekly tpe. it carried on throughout my first player's career, and bled into the next. believe it or not i was neck and neck with spartan for the entire time i was active on that player, and the unspoken competition between us kept me going just that little bit more. but i burnt out, and spartan went on to break the tpe record lmao. i'm not sure what that eventual break from the vhl did to me, but i don't feel that need to earn tpe even if i'm not in the mood to do all of the tasks. and that's ok.

Hello. I am somebody who is known by quite a few titles in the VHL circle. I am muffins, I am sniffum, I am a former pretty bad Vasteras GM, I am a former pretty good Warsaw GM, I have been FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY out of consideration for GM of the year, I am a VHL Hall of Fame Builder, I am a GFX maker, I am pretty irrelevant to the modern scope of the VHL considering I was gone for quite a while. But one distinction I have that not a lot of people might know about is that I played a pretty big hand in the FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY meme becoming a thing in the league, some ten years before the term meme ever came to be used as it is today.
 
But before I get into that, here’s a little bit of context and prior backstory that honestly mostly serves to pad the word count. If you don’t really care about this part (and you really probably shouldn’t), feel free to skip ahead a couple paragraphs where there will be a nice convenient tl;dr. Anyways, we begin our story some time in 2008 or so; I was 13 years old, and had been active in OOTP 6.5 players leagues that I had found on a complete coincidence for close to a year at that point. Somebody joined one of the leagues I was in and made graphics that far blew away what everybody else there was making, and they said they had honed their skills in the VHL. That interested me enough to check the league out even though I didn’t (and still don’t) really care at all about hockey. I created a new player with my name, did one point task, and promptly went inactive, going into my draft with a whopping 6 TPE. Calgary’s General Manager at the time was looking for somebody to draft in the 3rd round (a wasteland of inactives at the time) and saw that I put my screenname on a popular instant messaging service on my VHL profile, so he reached out to ask if I’d be active if he picked me. I said sure, so he drafted me. He boasted a few times around the league that he got himself a massive steal late in the draft, but I never even logged in to sign my contract, let alone earn any TPE. A few weeks later I was released and that was it for Damien Walec.
 
A few months later I recreated in the league as Optimus Prime. I stayed active enough to earn some TPE, including writing a biography that was essentially me transcribing the Transformers Wikipedia page and then adding on 100ish words at the end about Optimus Prime deciding to become a hockey player. I earned enough TPE to be selected in the 2nd round by Helsinki, but by that point I had once again run out of steam and ended up falling off as an inactive. From there, because I was still young and dumb, I figured nobody would want to touch any of my future players with a 10 foot pole because of my history of going inactive, so when I wanted to give the VHL a third shot I decided to come back with a new alias rather than using my old username.
 
Tl;dr my first couple VHL players didn’t go well and I worried I wouldn’t be taken seriously as a user and a potential player unless I re-joined the league with an alias. My third attempt at a player, Joey Clarence, was part of the S18 Superdraft that probably played a massive part in helping the VHL last past some of the doom and gloom that comes along with being a league driven by about 30 active members or so. Still, despite the fact that I was actually earning TPE at a strong rate, because I was in the eyes of others a new member in a draft full of good recreates, and because of the fact that I was a goalie in such a strong goalie draft, I wasn’t seeing a lot of attention being paid to my own player. I also decided that it’d be good to try to switch things up and have some fun with stuff considering playing things more as myself the first couple times around resulted in me getting bored pretty quickly.
 
So, I ended up going around to threads, generally media spots but at times just any thread at all, that didn’t mention Joey Clarence somewhere within them, and just commenting “šnubbed”. I did it quite a few times, just fucking around, and eventually people took notice. It was kind of hard not to when being the best team meant you had 6 active members on your team; when that’s your league setup, one person commenting the same thing in tens of threads a week is going to get peoples’ attention. Eventually the commissioner of the league, Slobo, who himself was apparently running quite a few multis to make the VHL’s rough active user numbers look a little less rough, decided to make a podcast talking about some things going on in the league. In the podcast he mentioned how annoying he found the whole “šnubbed” thing to be, and somewhere within that he mentioned FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY. From there, the word filter was put onto the forum and longtime members rejoiced every time a new member would use the word FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY somewhere in a media spot or a post only to be flabbergasted by what it changed to.
 
So yeah, that’s really it. I annoyed some people by trying to be a troll and putting FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY in threads all over the league and eventually the filter to make it FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY was implemented and subsequently carried over to every new iteration of the VHL forum that came along after. My attempts to continue trolling ended with me outing myself pretty stupidly (@JardyB10 was the one to figure it out), Joey Clarence ended up being one of the last active players selected in S18 but I stayed active and had a strong career, then went on to make my first and only VHL Hall of Famer on my next player with Tukka Reikkinen.
 
Long enough for 2 weeks of claims

1. We probably shouldn't have named Will Ferrell captain of the team, his insistence on streaking constantly has really put us in this position. I think that the continued development across the roster will improve the team, and will make us more consistent.
 
2. I expected Cologne to be right at the top of the E with Vasteras, so I'm surprised to see them in the middle of the standings at the moment.
 
3. Not really sure what it was like before because this is my first season in the E, but looking at the rosters across the league it seems to be more competitive. Definitely more depth in terms of TPE ratings on teams down the lineups.
 
4. I'd have to go co-MVP's for the goalies, they've both been terrific this season. They give us a chance to win every game.
 
5. Old iPod for music for sure, gotta get in the zone before big games!
 
6. Give me somewhere funny like Cairo or Rio de Janeiro just to throw something completely different into the mix. Time to expand the VHL globally!

I agree

i know i think he was

i know i think he was

i know i think he was

1. The team has been one of many streaks this season, our most recent being four losses. What do we need to do to turn that around?
I'm not advocating for any of us to become Tonya Harding, but perhaps we could use coercive tactics...
That's right. Full send into Fighting and Checking.
 
2. Which team's position in the standings (could be any one of the three leagues) are you most surprised about this season, and why?
Ours. WHY AREN'T WE FIRST ;-;
The sim is a fickle mistress.
 
3. Having gone through half a season so far, do you think the contraction to six teams was a positive change?
Yes, I'd say it feels overall competitive (save for the Olso Storm) without feeling explicitly coin-flippy against every team. It seems like we're clearly top four and only regularly lose to Vasteras.
 
4. Who would be your early pick for MVP of Bratislava so far, and why?
@McWolf/Sunset Moth, of course 😍
How could I choose anyone else? Sunset balances out how terrible Spanish Moon has been, and we've already had a question about how awesome our goalie is so I need to pick a new answer.
 
5. Do you have anything special in your locker in the dressing room besides hockey equipment?
Mothball remover. Don't ask.
 
6. Which city that hasn't seen a franchise among all of the VHL leagues would you like to see get a team?
Atlanta would be an interesting North American Conference add. Or maybe Minneapolis-St. Paul? I thought we used to have a Minnesota team but I might be mistaken.

i know i think he was

Because white men are always assumed to be allowed in, because society is built around them. Until the world can prove its ready to implicitly allow everyone, the rest of the crowd deserves an explicit invitation.

 
No, but the consequences are only there to convince people to give a flying fruitcake about the needs of others. That's why we have laws against murdering people too. But we never really needed no-murder zones because society implicitly understands that.  Until marginalized communities (including those with handicaps) are provided the rights they need without explicit statement, we need to continue the explicit statement.
 
 
Yes. If no handicap spots are available, able-bodied people will take the most accessible spots. This is exactly why we need explicit support for marginalized communities.

This would only indicate to me that the other shops must not like the Swiss and this one shop has to make it known that the Swiss can come in without fear.  If you feel unwelcomed because someone else was, you have acknowledgement issues.  Single child or middle achiever? The best and the worst get attention and you were neither?

1. We are about 1/3rd of the way into the season. Is your player performing how you expected them to?
Actually I'm much less involved in the offense than I expected to be. I'm a little saddened by it to be honest
 
2. Our goaler Jonny Elgar leads the league in save percentage and goals against. How important is an elite goaltender to the team's success?
I dunno, I feel like I hear "yes you must max earn" and "goalie TPE doesn't matter at all" sometimes one sentence after another. Is it a random number generator or directly proportional to your TPE? We've gotta get that story and fact straight.
 
3. If you could be any animal, which one would you be and why?
A capybara. Imagine being at one with the world as they always seem to be.
 
4. If you were stuck at burning man, what lengths would you go to to survive?
Why am I at Burning Man? Do I hate money and myself?
 
5. Are you a beach and ocean type person, or more of a woods and lake type person?
Why not both in different weekends? I'm probably a bit more of a woods/lake type person, though if we could do that without the risk of ticks that would be great.
 
6. What is your favourite nostalgic media to consume?
Probably Dragon Age: Origins. Is that too specific?