Ledge

          There's been a lot of strikingly different ways people have interpreted this seasons' theme week, but one that consistently reappears is just members looking back at events in the past, whether that be last season or a glory playoff run ages ago. That brings me to this article; I thought I might as well try to tick off some boxes with a short history of me in the VHL.

 

 

Phase 1: Ledge_and_Dairy, Clueless First Gen

 

I guess I didn't really realize how internet usernames worked at the time, because for some reason I put underscores as spaces in Ledge and Dairy. Anyways, I created Linus Zetterstrom, a Swedish, pass first (oh gosh, what did that mean again?) defenceman. I joined at a terrible time, right after the playoffs started, and of course the marvelous Junior Showcase Tournament didn't exist, so I just explored the site and clicked welfare and practice facility each week because I didn't know any better. Luckily, draft time came, and @JigglyGumballs decided to use a 4th round pick on me. I was forum-only at the time, because I was fairly new to the whole browser internet thing, and it was tough at first. Eventually in the season I joined discord, and had a lot of fun times. I got my feet on the ground and started running, max earning by week 4. Las Vegas was super fun, with Jiggs and @Spartan forming an all-star management group. This was back during the second COVID wave of 2020, so the locker room was full of active players. Zetterstrom did pass-first defenceman things, like getting mediocre points and not doing anything significant. In the S75 draft (best and deepest draft class of all time) I was drafted by the super-rebuilding Riga Reign, who had sold practically their entire team to buy into this super draft. That began the second phase of my time here.

 

Phase 2: Ledge_and_Dairy (still?), The Famously Unlucky Reign of Riga

 

After I was drafted by Riga, I entered a locker room that was even more active than Vegas somehow. Even though some of our top picks in the S75 class fizzled, we still put together an impressive (yet oddly underachieving) group of youngsters that included Justin Lose @youloser1337, Isau DaMoose @Eynhallow, Cabe McJake @ragequit, Matt thunder @Matt thunder, and Addison McLaren @tcookie. We were no doubt the most promising team in the VHL, yet for some reason we hardly made it far into the playoffs and put up noticeable numbers. It was one of the most bamboozling conundrums I have ever seen, and I know it drove @hedgehog337 off the wall. Either way, it was a fun time, and from S76-S79 I was AGM of the Reign, which gave me the experience I needed for the next step in my management career.

 

Phase 3: Ledge, VHLMGM Days

 

After I left Riga, I was hired as GM of Miami as a part of the mass hirings of S80. I've served the Marauders dutifully for nearly 4 seasons now, and this one will be my last. Blokes such as @nurx, @Sen, @Shindigs, and @Ben made it a fun ride. During this time, I created a brand new player, a bruising, scoring winger named Cobalt Burns, who kept Zetterstrom's tradition of being an underachiever so far in his career. Nevertheless, he'll have his first VHL season next season, and I'm excited to see what my second player brings to the table. 

 

 

That's about it. ~550 words. I'll be doing a sort of creative writing piece next week about Istanbul, so stay tuned for that. Yeah. Cya

You're selling yourself short bro, I think I earned that last spot lmao

2 hours ago, Spaz said:

1. What is your dream career? Have you achieved it yet?

 

 

2. They have a resident evil show on Netflix now, have you watched it or are you in anyway interested?

 

 

3. The trade deadline is coming up, how do you like our chances, is there something you would like to see moving forward?

 

 

5. How are you feeling about theme week this season?

 

 

6. I know it's crazy for me, but I would like to know how crazy it is to you guys that the VHL has been around for 15 season?

 

 

7. Who would you say has been someone you look up to on this site?

 

 

8. Unfortunately I can't do anything, but I'm interesting in what you would like the VHL, implement or add to make the forum or even sims better for you, realistic or not?

 

 

9. Who would you say has surprised you the most this season?

1. My last player, I didn't win any awards and didn't win a Cup. So I guess my ideal career is achieving some or both of those things.

2. Eh, I have other shows I'd rather watch, namely Breaking Bad.

3. I think our team is pretty good regardless, not really in need of a huge deadline trade.

5. It's weird, super vague. I'm not sure what to do, I've seen a few different things

6. Wild. Considering the quality of the internet back then, I think we live in a privileged age.

7. Papa Sparty in Moscow, although Kaleeb is definitely up there (you too Spaz)

8. I guess jersey numbers and sigs on player pages.

9. Busser has been tearing it up, him no doubt

Fuck man the VHL turned 15 23 days before me. I officially challenge the VHL to a fight, this shit has gone on long enough

       What can I say, I warned you? I wrote this while not intoxicated, alas still not quite level in the head. Should you continue, keep that in mind.

 

 

 

        In this extremely immersive virtual reality experiment, you, the test subject, will be interviewing Istanbul Red Wolves left winger Cobalt Burns while our scientists evaluate and make notes on your interactions with the artificial environment around you. You will be generously compensated with slices of lemon meringue pie of significant proportion, provided you give the scientists a quality interview. The dimensions of the slices of pie will, of course, match the amount of effort and thought you put into the interview questions. Best of luck, and give Mr Burns our regards.

 

          The headset and voluptuous silk VR gadgets are placed upon your person. 

 

          You are blinded by a flash of light, and as your vision returns, you look around to see Cobalt Burns, looking absolutely fabulous in a maroon tux, awaiting your questions. Practically already tasting the sweet lemon meringue on your tongue, you begin with the questions.

 

Q - Istanbul is pretty high in the standings yo, why they so high cuh?

 

A - Cuz we the best yo, nothin else to it. No one come close to us jit

 

Q - Very good, at the very least satisfactory. Who’s really been pulling their weight around there?

 

A - I mean, we got like 5 guys in the top 10 in points in the league, so it’s for sure a team effort yo. The tendies, daredevil and Shaun Young, are, like, the best in the biz, and they like share the crease yo

 

Q - That’s great to hear, really fantastic, yo. Downright stupendous. I hear you got 53 penalty minutes jit, what’s goin on wit dat?

 

A - Ey ya know bruv, it da tings get rough, ya know I’m on top of the pile ja? Nothin beats a little skatey punchy on Saturday night innit

 

Q - Alright, you can only pay me so much, I’m not talking like I’m crazy blazed anymore. I want that sweet lemon meringue. Where you finna play next season?

 

A - Let’s just say that while Istanbul has been a blast, I’m ready for the next level. Every time I look at my Titans hat I think about how I could be wearing that jersey and bringing the Continental Cup back to Helsinki. It’s a huge motivator to really kick ass this season with the Wolves, but ultimately yeah, I’m gonna play in the VHL. 

 

Q - Alright, that’s great, that’s great, that’s really fuckin good, I’m so happy for you mate. Good lad. I have to ask, I looked at your stats from the World Juniors last offseason……you got anything to say?

 

A - I don’t wanna talk about it. My ice time in those games…..I just don’t wanna talk about it. I’ll get Canada the World Cup next time that comes around. Next question.

 

Q - Boy you short as hell boy, why you so short?

 

A - If you want that pie you better shut the hell up and get on with this interview you skink

 

Q - Okokokokok. Uh what song do you listen to before games?

 

A - That’s a lame ass question, no way you’re getting this pie jit.

 

Q - You didn’t answer my question bro

 

A - Ask a better question then bro

 

Q - This is a privilege for you, okay? The only reason you’re here is because of this stupid experiment. No one else wanted to interview you 

 

A - I hate to break it to you but those labcoats running the experiments are paying me with more pie than you numnuts

 

Q - This is ridiculous. Go [removed] a donkey

 

A - I’m gonna go eat my pie now, sweet dreams you fuckin rooster

 

          As you rip the headset off your face you are once again blinded for some reason, and when your vision returns you see the scientists all crowded around you looking very disappointed. One of them beckons at a sad little slice of pie no wider than your index finger on a sad, metal plate. You are given a sad metal fork and told to eat the pie. You gobble that pie down to reveal the image etched into the bottom of the plate; Burns enjoying his slice of pie, easily the size of your forearm. Filled with rage, you smash the plate on the ground as you have been soundly defeated by the great Cobalt Burns.

TL;DR - Read the article, it's not that long
 

That concludes my 700+ word media spot. I have zero doubt you have never read anything like it, and will only ever see it again next time I let my fingers gracefully surf the keyboard. Happy belated birthday.

GAME RECAP BECAUSE I GOT A TRIVIA WRONG (this is a punishment)

 

SOOOOO we got Helsinki against Riga which is a checks standings gonna be a close game probably. Gotta love those close games right guys. Anyway Alex Johnston and Nathan Powers BAM BAM two goals within a minute of each other with 5 minutes left in the first, really tilted the rink like this / after those nips. In the second period Gustislav Nasherov and Nezuko BAM BAM two goals within a minute and a half of each other and we're tied, rink is now more like -. JaredN Jr scores less than a minute in for Riga in the third (BAM), but Reylynn Reinhart and Alessandro Nano both nip for los titanos to give them the massive W and a boost in the standings. Star players gotta be the tendy Xavy Boobs who just didn't let Riga have anything. 

 

On 7/13/2022 at 10:43 PM, Spaz said:

1. How are you feeling about your player so far this season?

 

 

2. Are you having fun this season?

 

 

3. We lead the league in a tight race, what do we have to do to keep on top?

 

 

4. Who would you say your biggest rival has been this season so far?

 

 

5. Tyler Busser is only 3 points from leading the league, do you have any motivation for him to achieve that?

 

 

6. What is your favorite flavor of Ice cream?

 

 

7. What has been the most surprising trade in the NHL offseason 

 

 

8. Who do you think was the biggest draft steal of the NHL draft?

 

 

9. What is the most surprising signing you have seen so far during free agency this NHL offseason 

1. Not too bad, he started off slow but has really picked it up recently.

2. Hell yeah, love Istanbul

3. Just keep winning, don't give Bratislava the satisfaction of getting in our heads

4. The Watchmen in general, don't like those punks (dammit they got in my head)

5. I have no doubt that lead will belong to him sooner or later

6. Butterscotch, nothing can compare

7. Gotta be the Kirby Dach carousel, might work wonders for Les Habitants

8. Seamus Casey falling to the end of the second round was a super steal for the Devils

9. Erik Gudbranson getting 4 million dollars of AAV. Like cmon.

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Adam, welcome back to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are rebuilding. We're looking for players to lead our team each night, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Holy smokes it's actually happening!

 

I APPLY!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Justice, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are rebuilding. We're looking for players to lead our team each night, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

@Ben mclaughlin and @solyom, it was great to have you on Miami for these last two seasons. I wish you the best of luck in Mississauga!

 

@Daniel Janser Thanks for smooth negotiations, good luck this season!

On 7/8/2022 at 11:22 AM, KaleebtheMighty said:

PRESS CONFERENCE - Week of July 8th, 2022
(Just answer at least 6 of the questions for 2 TPE)

 

1). We are sitting on top of the standings in the VHLE. Do you think we can hold on and continue leading the standings?

2). Who on our team right now would you say has the best chances of being our team MVP?

3). How is your player doing right now?

4). Dog person or cat person? Or do you have a different favorite pet?

5). Are you watching the NHL draft? If so, how is your team doing?

6). How many points do you think the Red Wolves will finish with at the end of the season?

7). The team cooks are hosting a big potluck dinner for the team after practice today. Each player is supposed to bring their favorite dish. What are you bringing to the dinner?

8). Are you a morning person or an evening person?

9). Hypothetical: You're on the final ballot for voting in the next President of the United States! You're doing well in the polls and it's looking good for you. However, you still need a running mate to serve as your Vice President. Who in the VHL community would you pick to serve as your Vice President? (Tag them here if you'd like!)

1. No other team can compare to our depth and star power. 

2. Busser is lighting it up right now, so probably him

3. Not too bad, just came off of a six-point sim, so satisfied for now

4. Dog person, specifically golden retreiver person.

5. Hell yes, the Habs knocked it out of the park, Chadkovsky to the moon!

6. A significant amount, perhaps over 120

7. You already know I'm pulling up with a bunch of Booster Juice

8. Morning person 100%, even when I sleep in I like to get to bed early. 

9. @Dil so I could make him do the things I don't want to do 

Probably should have said this a few days ago, but I'm visiting my grandparents on Vancouver Island for another week, and have lots of exciting things to do here offline

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Gulman, welcome to the VHL! As a fellow hockey fan, I can appreciate the username haha. I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Welcome back Blazzer! I can offer you a second line spot with special teams on a Miami team that is a goalie away from being a contender. 

 

However we will probably be selling because I'm stepping down so keep that in mind

 

Best of luck with your new career!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Sean, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi star, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

On 6/21/2022 at 11:42 AM, Spaz said:

1. How excited are you for this upcoming season?

 

2. What are some goals you would like to achieve this season?

 

3. After 3 games of the Stanley Cup finals, who do you think will end up winning?

 

4. If drafted, how do you feel about your draft position? (Too early, late, or where you expected)

 

5. What is your favorite genre of music?

 

6. Who were you drafted by in the VHL?

 

7. Where do you expect us to finish in the standings this season?

 

8. Who do you think you will have the best chemistry with this season?

 

9. If you're of age, what is your favorite liquor? If not of age what is your favorite pop/soda?

1. So excited I can barely hold it in. I can already see the Red Wolf being engraved onto the Renaissance Cup

2. Lead the league in goals, hits, and shots. And win the cup.

3. I thought Tampa would win tbh, I was pleasantly surprised with the outcome

4. I'm satisfied, the lower TPE guys in front of me were a more wanted position

5. 90s Grunge and alternative, with rap as a close second

6. Los Titanos de Helsingfors!

7. At the very top looking down

8. I've played with Eynhallow for a long time, so I can imagine our new players will mesh

9. I don't drink soda, but Shirley Temples are pretty dope

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Tacoca, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top four minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi domestic cube, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Maiik, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!

Congrats!

Credit to Zetterberg

 

Hi Zack, welcome to the VHL! I'm Ledge, the GM of the Miami Marauders. This season, the Marauders are looking to compete for a cup. We're still filling out our core, so that means we can offer you top six minutes. The Marauders are historically a very successful franchise, having won 2 championships in the last 5 seasons, despite only becoming a franchise fairly recently. Our discord locker room has lots of new players like yourself as well as successful alumni to help you on your journey. Quote this post with 'Dropping the Anchor!' if you want to join the Miami Marauders.

 

Good luck with your career!