Thunder

Thanks for the nice words. Appreciate it.

Graphic Review Doing this review for the 1 tpe because I got a trivia question wrong. The size of the graphic is really good because you have a lot to include and your dimensions and symmetry make the the graphic appealing. I especially like the storm created with the lettering as they move in the graphic. Only thunder audio is missing. This graphic is the first one I’ve seen of yours, so I don’t know how talented you are, but it appears that you are experienced enough to include complexities to your graphic, which I appreciate. The color combination in the background is fitting for the graphic and the shapes create a background that makes it a realistic backdrop of crappy weather. The words involved in the storm give the added effect of unpredictable weather! I like the logos on the outside of the storm and their size are symmetrical to the graphic. The red lettering doesn’t match the shade of the logos which gives it enough contrast to separate the graphic experience. You did a really good job with this graphic. Score 9/10

Half way through the VHL season, its time to take a look at Rip Wheeler and Logan Ninefingers again. The disappointment of Wheeler, @ScottyP, has dissipated this season as he seems to be getting more involved and producing some team playing numbers. And Logan Ninefingers, @Scurvy, the promising rookie started off the season incredibly slow, now appears to be adding some contribution to his team. The contrast between the two players is incredible. Starting with Rip Wheeler, his numbers are up, he’s hitting more, getting in the way of shots, and passing the puck to teammates to score. Wheeler is surrounded by solid players, which could be the main factor in his success this season. Off the ice, Wheeler is going through the motions with his improvement. Barely adding to his TPE, Wheeler is not expected to step up to the next level anytime soon. Logan Ninefingers, on the other hand, works his ass off every week off the ice, building TPE at max pace, and working on his skills to be the best player he can be. Also surrounded by good players, Ninefingers is headed in the right direction in his hockey career. Just like IRL, Rip Wheeler holds on to the coattails of others while Logan Ninefingers strives to excel and outperform. No surprise there! 219 words

What timing to have a “rebrand” theme week! Yesterday I completed my media spot to post this morning to go for two weeks and it involves Saskatoon’s nemesis, Halifax 21st, and then theme week comes out to talk about rebranding. So it looks like @LucyXpher, the spectacular GM for Halifax, will have to wait a week to find out the details of what was discovered as the reason Saskatoon cannot win over Halifax. I gotta be honest, I tried to think of a reason to rebrand Halifax and maybe it would change the outcome of the Saskatoon games but the logo is great, the team name is fitting, and there’s nothing to complain about. I checked out the VHLE and nothing stuck out to write about. I jumped to the VHL and thought about moving New York to Winnipeg, but it just didnt pan out. So… I had to go back to the VHLM. One team kept catching my eyes, and that team is the Las Vegas Aces. For anyone who has been involved with the Las Vegas Aces, you are well aware of the team member who is the rock of Las Vegas. The team member is Juan Ceson, who played eight seasons with the Las Vegas Aces. Juan Ceson, The current AGM for Las Vegas, @dylanjj37 put Las Vegas on the map. It wasn’t just with the style of play by Juan Ceson, or what he did on the ice. It was what Juan Ceson means to Las Vegas off the ice. During his time with Las Vegas, Juan Ceson rebranded Las Vegas through his generosity and endless amount of money. For example, the Juan Ceson Hotel and Resort is now the biggest and most popular resort in Vegas. People come from all over the world to stay at the Juan Ceson Castle. And then there is Juan Ceson Boulevard, where you can find all types of attractions, to include activities for the young and old, the daring and the passive, as well as the athletic and the docile. The Juan Ceson Hockey Arena, a state of the art facility that was built by Juan Ceson, and donated to the city out of the goodness of his heart, is the current home ice for Las Vegas. One can find all sorts of memorabilia at the Juan Ceson store inside the arena. Up and down Juan Ceson Boulevard, people are clothed in Juan Ceson sports wear. Riding in the Juan Ceson Uber cars, which include an assortment of vehicles owned by Juan Ceson, including Porsches, Mercedes Benz, Rolls Royce, and Teslas. I could go on and on about Juan Ceson’s philanthropic work, but there is one that has stuck out for eight seasons and has always been his most treasured place to go. Discussions on discord have sometimes gone on and on with several people giving input, and the focus often came back to Juan Ceson’s favorite pet, his pony. The Juan Ceson Zoo is home to his pony. For these reasons, the Las Vegas Aces are to be rebranded the Las Vegas Ponies. If I had any talent at all with graphics, a pony would be the centerpiece of the logo, but not just any pony. It would be Juan Ceson’s pony, which changes color depending on Juan Ceson’s mood. 554 words

Congrats @Scurvy . That was a killer article. Well written and every word deserved. You are a monster and Brian Payne’s career was incredible. Good Job. You deserved it…. @leandrofg nice work. You definitely did some research.

Great career Payne. Real classy drinking whiteclaws outside Curves in your spandex.

Something you’ll never hear from @ScottyP

Happy birthday Victor!!

Could you get him to slow down against Saskatoon please?

1. Happy belated April Fools! Any jokes stick out to you on the forum or elsewhere on April 1st? Not at liberty to divulge that information. 2. How big of an impact do you think the STHS tweak to goalies has had so far? So big, that the future of goalies in the VHL is in jeopardy.. 3. How is your VHFL/Super Coach team doing, if participating? If not, any particular reason why you didn’t sign up this season? I havent even checked. I’m guaranteed to get 1 tpe, anything more is a bonus. 4. Did you get your VHL predictions in on time for this season? Ah shit. I gotta look. I might have forgotten to finish it. I was waiting to copy Alex’s but didnt do it. 5. If your player was an animal, what would they be? A shark, what else? 6. What is your favorite thing about the sim league experience? Bashing @Scurvy 7. What is your favorite song currently? La Reina del Sur 8. Have you ever traveled internationally? If so, to what countries? USA , Canada , Mexico. That’s enough

1. Following our 9-3-0 start, we're just 7-7-1 since, giving us a 16-10-1 record. What do we need to do to get back to playing the way that we were at the start of the season? shoot more, score more, and dont let the other team score as much! 2. Are you a fan of April Fools Day jokes/pranks? Its all in good fun, sometimes! I dish things out so gotta take it too. 3. Our goalies are both in the top 8 in goals against average and save percentage. Would you stick with a full rotation where they each play every other game, or do you think somebody needs to get the net for a long run? That’s up to the GM. We have two really good goalies. Works for the Bruins 4. What TV show are you currently watching? Beverly Hillbillies 5. Leo Neelson III will be tied for the most games played in Saskatoon history at the end of the season. What should the team be doing to acknowledge that incredible feat? Pizza party 6. Would you change the NHL's current overtime rules of 5 minutes of 3-on-3 followed by a shootout? well…. My wife hates shootouts. She gets so nervous. So that being said, I like the way it is right now.

Ha ha.. i did too!!

Of course!!

Of Course….

The Saskatoon Wild question and answer segment is officially activated. The first player to make a guest appearance is Lazlo Holmes, @Gustav , the star defenseman drafted 3rd in this season’s VHLM draft. Holmes popped into the studio and he had a lot to say, albeit they were mostly one-liners, but nevertheless Holmes was informative, open, and honest. This summarizes the Q&A segment. Q - Lazlo, what is the biggest piece of advice you can provide newcomers to the VHL, and playing in the VHLM? A- “It ain’t easy being green.” Q - Could you elaborate on that a little please? I mean you are relatively new, that’s true, but you are a superstar and a promising prospect to the VHL, likely to be the #1 overall pick in the season 94 VHL draft. Is there anything that could hamper your chances of being selected first overall? A - “Being forcibly removed from the Walmart Deli.” Q - I see, thanks for being honest. Now, back to hockey, is there anything that interrupts your hockey progress that you can readily identify? A - “Being really bored on Sundays.” Q - Oh really, that’s too bad. How do you overcome this boredom so that you are back to focusing on hockey? A - “Descaling a coffee machine, and being disgusted by myself.” Q - Well, to each his own I suppose. Now, your knowledge of VHL hockey is a proven commodity and you are definitely a legend due to your experience and success. Is there anything that has ever frustrated you enough to cause you to rethink your time in the VHL? A - “Getting incredibly offended by GM’s who dont take my GM suggestions.” Q - I see. Thank you. Now, what is your favorite thing to do in between games? A - “Rockin the suburbs.” Q - Interesting. The last question, what would you be doing if you weren’t playing hockey? A - “Ballin’,” Thank you Lazlo Holmes, that ends the Saskatoon Wild Q&A segment. 326 words

Claim week 4/4

Happy birthday @Victor

Happy Birthday!!

. With one week of sims down, is the team performing as you’ve expected? Saskatoon was doing great but now on a 3 game losing streak. Trueno needs to step up. 2. Who do you predict will be Davos’ MVP this season? That’s easy…. David Jokenin @Ahma 3. What are your thoughts on our current prospect pool? Alex was a genius once again. 4. If you are participating, what does your VHFL or Super Coach team look like? If you aren’t participating, any reason why you chose not to sign up this season? Not very good. I picked Logan Ninefingers, @Scurvy only so I could blame him for my lack of success. 5. What is your most controversial VHL opinion? Huh? I guess this question would be!! 6. If Davos had a mascot, what would it look like? Ahma 7. What sports do you enjoy watching besides hockey? Curling, chess, synchronized flag twirling, 8. What was the last video game you played? FIFA - take that @Scurvy, biatch!!!!

1. How are you feeling about the team after the 9-3-0 start? Cant complain. The team is strong. We have some good goal scorers and the goalies are incredible. 2. If you could take one player from the NHL and put them on our team right now, who would it be and why? Radko Gudas because we’d be teammates!! 3. What is your go to drink when you're relaxing? H2O 4. Are you pleased with your player's first dozen games? My player would like to be contributing with more blocked shots and more hits. It’d also be nice to have a fight or two under his belt. 5. What team do you think looks like the biggest threat to us early on? Cant think of any. We have held our own every game. I dont see anyone getting in our way. 6. Is the playoff field in the NHL set, or do you think that someone is going to sneak in with only a few weeks left? I know the Sharks arent getting in. As long as the Penguins stay out too, I’m happy. Otherwise I dont care. Boston better not disappoint though

Have to ask Trudeau!!!!!

Transaction ID: 3E560381GD934211Y $1 million player store 5 uncapped TPE 6 TPE doubles week

Getting to the VHL for Mario Juan Huerto-Villa was a bumpy road to say the least. Born in the Miguel Higaldo barrio of the City of Zitácuaro, Michoacán. He never knew his mother nor his father; at just three months old, they were gunned down in a cartel rivalry bloodbath between the La Familia Michoacán and the Los Zetas, while on their way to Morelia. Mario and his maternal grandmother, Eunesia Balastar Huerto Gonzalez, were swept up by surviving Familia members and brought to an undisclosed location where Mario’s fate began. An infertile wife of a prominent member in the cartel took him in as her own. In doing so, Eunesia had to choose death or exile to walk the beaches of Puerto Vallarta and sell wooden alibrejes dolls. Mario Juan Huerto-Villa soon became nicknamed Bollos de Trueno, due to his gastric issues as a baby, having a propensity to fill his diapers with explosive force. As he grew, every child associated with the cartel familia, knew him and identified him as Thunder Buns, to the point that Bollos preferred this name to his birth name. Living in a communal campo gave Bollos a fierce instinct for survival. The older kids abused the younger ones and the higher status kids abused them all. But as statuses changed, so did the abuse. For Bollos de Trueno, he learned to stand up to kids, regardless of age or power, often times leading to fighting with sticks, rocks, and anything else they could find as a weapon. After every fight however; those involved always made up and continued on as friends, or somewhat on friendly terms. As the La Familia Michoacán and Los Zetas cartels fought and turmoil found its way into the campo again, one day chaos erupted and five year old Bollos de Trueno found himself in a tractor trailer loaded with one and a half tons of pure methamphetamine hidden in watermelon crates, headed for the United States. Once inside the U.S., Bollos de Trueno was passed off to a human trafficking group and was illegally sold to a wealthy Canadian couple desperately wanting a child. False documents afforded Bollos de Trueno’s new family to get him into Ontario without issue. The only hitch in this scheme was that Mario Juan Huerto-Villa no longer existed and Bollos de Trueno, the snot nosed five year old with a gastric disorder moved into a mansion in a neighborhood that was named North York, which later became known as The Bridle Path, in Toronto. Trueno’s new parents immediately hired translators to teach Bollos English, French, and Mandarin, and even provided him with a piano teacher to give him some aesthetic appreciation and shake off some of his unpolished personality. As it turned out, Trueno’s new adoptive mother was a professional ice skater when she lived in China, and Trueno took an interest in ice skating in the massive indoor rink on the property. Trueno was being taught figure skating for months until the NHL season started up and he and his new adoptive family attended the first home game of the Toronto Maple Leafs, in their family suite. Trueno fell in love with the game of hockey, especially the physical part of the game. He was impressed with the speed and agility of these skaters, and the gamesmanship with a stick and puck. He especially enjoyed the roughness and fights, wishing he was with his friends back in Mexico only playing hockey. Trueno gave up figure skates, much to the chagrin of his adoptive mother, but not the father, put on hockey blades, grabbed a stick and his mother’s skating rink was turned into a hockey rink. Over the next few years, Trueno was provided with trainers and developed his skills rather quickly. It became apparent that hockey was Bollos de Trueno’s future, and he was given every opportunity to excel. He couldn’t get enough hockey. He went to every home game and spent time on the ice hours before the games with some of the Maple Leafs kids. The kids seemed to have unfettered access to the Air Canada Centre. To this day, Trueno doesn’t know the relationship his new father had with the Leafs, even after the arena’s name changed to Scotiabank Arena. The first sign of trouble for Trueno came when he joined the Atom League. He was granted a waiver to play under age, most likely due to influence from his adoptive father, and clearly demonstrated his abilities to earn a first line defender position. Considerably smaller than the other players, he resorted back to aggressive behavior from his childhood days in the cartel camp, and was suspended for using his hockey stick as a weapon after being called a derogatory name by a smart mouthed 10 year old. Given the unlimited money by his family, Trueno was provided a sports psychologist to overcome his anger and he was able to rejoin the Atom League the following season, and without surprise he became an instant successful hockey youth. Trueno also shined in the PeeWee league, Bantam, and Midget. Trueno was drafted by the Niagara IceDogs in the first round, but never made it to training camp because his adoptive parents were killed in a private plane crash outside of Banff National Park, returning from a business meeting in Vancouver. Trueno’s desire to compete and play hockey disappeared overnight. Confused, alone, and in emotional despair, Trueno sought out the only blood family member he knew, his abuela. He had a sizable amount of cash along with a debit card, and convinced a young couple who were already going to Mexico to allow him to tag along, at no cost to the couple. Trueno promised to not be a bother and did not disclose to this couple he had no intention of returning to Canada. Once they landed, Trueno helped the couple with his translation to ease their process through the airport and to their beach condo. It was then that Trueno broke the news to them that he would be on his own from there, and thanked them for their help. In addition, he gave them an extra thousand dollars for their silence. Trueno wasted no time getting onto the beach and felt completely out of place, even though this was his country. On the sand, he walked among the poverty of vendors trying to scrap for pesos, all the while he looked over ropes, small walls, and other barriers where he saw people he related to more, those with money and means to thrive. The contrast stupefied him. He spent his first three days walking the hotel zone, asking every vendor he came across, before receiving promising information for him to try the marina. His hopes were shattered however; after two more days of searching came up with no abuela. Left with no other choice, he continued south back past the hotel zone and began inquiring along the Malecón and then entered the Romantic Zone. By now, it seemed that every vendor was aware of his quest for an elderly woman named Eunesia. After a week and a half, Trueno was about to step off the beach to find some tacos; tired, hungry, and emotionally distraught, a vendor came running towards him screaming he had seen Eunesia. Trueno quickly got the information and began running the beach south looking for her. Trueno spotted a tiny woman carrying a board with alibrejes characters, and was convinced it was his grandmother. He started shouting, “abuela” and as he got closer the woman turned and immediately teared up. Fifteen years later, her prayers were answered. They embraced for what seemed like hours before speaking. Eunesia’s legs gave out with the excitement and she insisted on learning everything about her grandson. Eunesia knew nothing of what hockey was, but listened intently about the sport as Trueno described it. When he finished explaining his life, Eunesia was adamant that Trueno return to Canada and live there, play hockey, and enjoy his life. This turned into hours of discussion and disagreement. In the end, Eunesia promised to collect the proper documents for her to go to Canada if Trueno returned to Canada as soon as possible. Eunesia did not have a cell phone but she told Trueno that she has access to a public phone and they agreed Trueno would call the number every Sunday morning at 6 AM PV time. They parted and Trueno sought out the couple who got him into Mexico for an unexpected return. Upon his return, Trueno met with the IceDogs management and was given the opportunity to try out again the following year. In the meantime, he rejoined his team in the Midget League, and spent the season dominating the Midgets. Trueno spent two seasons with the IceDogs racking up a plethora of hits and blocked shots, as well as contributing to several wins, even though Trueno struggled somewhat as his sudden growth caused him to skate awkwardly for a few months. In addition to that, a lower body injury prevented him from competing in the playoffs. At VHLM draft time, it was explained to Bollos de Trueno that the draft pool was deep with defensemen and it would likely be that Trueno would be selected in the late second round or early to mid third round. Trueno didnt mind, he just wanted to be selected so that he could prove to be a valuable hockey player. Trueno was thrilled when he was selected 19th by the Saskatoon Wild. Trueno hopes to enjoy a successful season with the Wild and contributes as best he can learning from his teammates, and hopes on winning the championship. He calls his abuela every Sunday morning and updates her on his weekly performance. Progress for gathering appropriate documentation to leave Mexico has been a struggle for Eunesia, but she does not tell Trueno anything other than things are moving along fine and she should be in Canada soon, which in reality is very unlikely. 1674 words

Ten games into the VHL season and things are upside down. Shit is all screwed up. When I say screwed up, I’m talking about Rip Wheeler, @ScottyP, and Logan Ninefingers, @Scurvy. Apparently Logan Ninefingers has seven of those nine fingers up his ass. Ninefingers should be scoring goals, making assists, hitting hard, and blocking shots. Rip Wheeler should be sucking, barely producing, and maybe blocking a shot or two. Rip Wheeler had a whopping 16 shots block last season, and after only ten games this season he’s already got 9 shots blocked. Meanwhile, in Vancouver, Logan Ninefingers has blocked the puck only twice in ten games. But wait, Ninefingers is a heavy hitter, while Rip Wheeler is a big pussy. Oops, things are backwards again. Ninefingers has counted for 22 hits this season, while Wheeler has already racked up 34 hits. My world is in crisis mode. I should be trashing Wheeler every week and bragging about Ninefingers, instead I’m laying out Ninefingers slow, sad, pathetic performance. In fact, things are so messed up, I can barely think right now, so I’m gonna finish up and list the other successes of Wheeler before I puke. Wheeler has 3 goals and 9 assists through ten games, while Ninefingers has 2 goals and 3 assists. Luckily, this anomaly is going to be short lived, so you better do all your shit talking this week at the office while you can Scottyp, because scurvy earns a hell of a lot more TPE each week and his diminished stats are only a small hiccup, and I’ve got a hell of a lot more faith in Ninefingers than in Wheeler. Hopefully next week, I’ll be able to get back on track and write about how Logan Ninefingers smashed Rip Wheeler’s face. 297 words

Claim week 3 of 4