theme week What if Eno had a brain?

[bigAL 2,176]

What if Eno had a Brain?

 

Big brain or no brain?

 

Eno Rama, the legendary GM of the DC Dragons, the only GM of the DC Dragons, is one groovy dude. He does stuff, he does things, and sometimes occasionally even does GM things. But the real question is: does he do smart things?

 

I don't think I'm revealing any state secrets here. It's widely known that Eno has a thing for first-gens. He exclusively spends his first-round picks on first-time-round players. As a first gen, I think it's great; as a member invested in the long-term success of the league, I think it's great; as a manager, I think it's a bold move Cotton: let's see if it'll pay off. Since DC has joined the league, the Dragons have only drafted first gens in the first round. Let's look at the stats:

 

First round picks:

- S73 - Groovy Dood @bigAL

- S76 - Caitlyn Catowize

 

Alright, that's a pretty tiny sample size. It's true: in the six drafts since DC has come into the league via expansion, Eno has only spent two first round picks. Those picks were not good: Catowize promptly went IA, retired, and recreated; and as we'll see later, Groovy Dood was the wrong choice here.

 

If there's no first round picks to look at, what about seconds?

 

Second round picks:

- S72: Liam Flaten (1st gen, played two season in DC before going inactive and getting traded)

- S75: Ove Dyrdahl (GRZ, DCD LEGEND, had to be drafted back to DC)

- S77: creed (1st gen, legacy TBD)

 

 

Ok, what the hell Eno? I guess he's too busy hosting the draft to actually do any drafting. Five picks in the first two rounds in the past six drafts? We're inching closer to answering our guiding question, wondering if there's anything between the Eno ear and the Rama ear.

 

Will Eno ever draft in the first round again? Based on his drafting record, Dragons fans should hope not.

 

Revisionist History Time!

So now we get to the real question: what would happen if Eno had a brain and drafted with his head and not his heart? Let's focus on the franchise-altering draft: S73.

 

S73 was a huge year for DC. The Dragons entered the league in S72 and promptly fell flat on their face. Finishing with a record reminiscent of their S77 start, the Dragons managed a measly 64 points from 30 wins, good for last in the NA conference and ahead of only Malmao in the league basement.

 

Embarrassing first seasons are a hallmark of a good expansion franchise, and DC was going all-in on that belief. Finishing 11th in the 12 team league gave DC a 25% shot at winning the first overall pick. This was back in the glory days of the actual lottery, and not some poorly-named meme of a loser tournament (which is a friggin' godsend for Eno because that S72 roster would not have helped the team's draft stock at all). With that 25% chance - the same 25% as the Vancouver Beavisses, 20% going to the Czech Ghosts, and 30% for the favourited Malmao GreenBirds - the DC Dragons win the first overall pick.

 

Even for a Dragon, that's a lot of balls.

 

That first overall pick was kept (woah!) and spent on franchise forward, legendary first-gen, and now AGM of the team, Groovy Dood. This was a controversial, despite getting a LICK on the legendary Bust or List lists from the degenlord himself. But what if Eno had a brain and drafted an established player?

 

Let's revisit the S73 draft with the benefit of hindsight and the recognition of self-bias:

 

S73 first round.

 

Should Eno have stuck to his "first-gen only" philosophy? Let's see.

 

First, look at all the first gens here: Groovy, Jeffy Pines, Patrik Laine, DLame, Kosmo Kramerev, Wolf Stansson, Andre Lebastard. Almost half of the first round went rookie VHLers. Maybe Eno was onto something?

 

So, which returnees went in the first? Answer: a shitload of goalies. Kanou winner JP Camus, the impossible to spell Grekkark Gyrfalcon, and the Russian dancing bear Jacob Tonn. DC at this time already had superstar goalie of the future Stone Wolski, and they were going to pass on any goalie available in the draft. The running tally of players chosen is up to 10/16.

 

Who's left? Let's start with the hard-nos:

- Marshall John Frostbeard, GM player pick for Malmao back when that was allowed

- Alec Volchenkov. Forum user created in 2018, and technically somehow Volchenkov is a first-gen player?  seems sus

- Shawn Glade Lii. No comment, not touching that with a ten foot pole

- John Merrick. I don't know the pre-Merrick reputation of the player agent, but the recent league-wide discussion on toxicity makes me think this is a cautious pass

 

That leaves two players left:

- Tyler Walker, defenseman from ADV

- Micah Adrienne, defenseman from Poptart

 

If Eno had a brain, he would have...

Spoiler

Drafted Tyler Walker first overall.

 

At the time, Groovy was a controversial pick. Both Walker and Adrienne had almost 100 more TPE than the Dood, but now, at the end of their primes, Groovy Dood leads both by 30 and 70 TPE respectively. But, as Eno knows better than literally anyone in the league, TPA != success. That's why he chose the lower-TPE player, but hindsight says he shouldn't have.

 

Let's look at the S73 DCD roster, starting with the forwards. Did they need Groovy Dood?

 

Guys with term:

- Perennial MVP candidate and 1C Benny Graves. A S69 who had four more seasons in the league.

- Kevin Brooks Trophy for Most Pucks in the Net winner Guy Lesieur starting his prime

- Super prospect Xavier Laflamant

Plus old farts:

- DCD LEGEND Mikko Aaltonen, only player to have his number retired

- 2C stud Boris the Forest

 

Okay, sure, fine, a forward of the future to reload after Graves and Lesieur is nice. I bet if Eno ever drafted players, he could have found someone else to fill that hole though. Because, look at the defence:

- Charles Drumm: retiring

- Ricky Johnson: retiring next season

- Luciano Valentino: 1D who went IA unexpectedly

- Liam Flaten: first gen who went IA

 

Big oofs. None of those players have played for DC this season or last because of retirements or inactivity.

 

Defense has been the bane of Eno's existence since DC started becoming competitive. Case in point: the S75 playoffs where DC made a magical run to the Continental Cup Finals:

S75 playoff scoring. See: Groovy Dood's 15 in 20, Jackson Philliefan's 1 in 20, and Dyrdahl's 10 in 20.

 

That roster didn't make the finals because of Groovy Dood. One could argue they made it in spite of Groovy Dood. Only Jared Willis, sophomore defender who hadn't updated that season and is now retired, finished below Groovy in forward scoring. The bottom pairing finished where a bottom pairing is expected to finish, but the real story of the back end is the age of the defenders. Both Ove Dyrdahl and Jackson Philliefan were rookies during that run. Again, the Dragons made the Finals in spite of their deficiencies on the blue line. Eno spent the offseason trying to bolster that hole in his lineup by trading futures for one year of Cinnamon Block and young player (noted LoL fanatic) Defenz Mann.

 

But what if the Dragons had Tyler Walker for that playoff run?

 

First off, it has to be said: the Malmao Nighthawks beat Groovy Dood's DC Dragons in the Finals that year. Walker wasn't on that team, having been traded to Davos for a first and two thirds, after being drafted one spot behind Groovy Dood. Yup: the Nighthawks sold their second overall pick AND won the Cup in the same season.

 

Second, DC played a lot of games in those playoffs. Every season but the Finals went to 7. That's taxing on players, and I believe that there would be more wins and less losses during that run if they had a defender of Walker's calibre. Every single game but five (one vs Vancouver, two vs Chicago, two vs Malmo) finished as a one goal game (including empty netters). 75% of their playoff games were decided by one goal! Yes, two of those ten games were won by Groovy Dood's GWG, but still: DC would've had an easier run if they could play defense.

 

The proof is in the goal differential stats. Despite beating both Chicago and Vancouver in seven games, DC had a near negative goal differential in both series. DC outsocred Vancouver 21-20, showing just how close that series was. Chicago, losers in 7, outscored DC 22-18. Malmo, the only team to beat DC four times, outscored DC 13-15. These series were toight like a tiger.

 

With so few goals seperating winners and Vancouver, goal prevention becomes incredibly important. Stone Cold Wolski did everything he could to keep DC rolling, including a 2.72 GAA and a 0.929 SV%, so it's definitely not on the goalie. Instead, the porous defense likely made the difference in the Malmo series. +/- is an inherently flawed stat, but it's the best defensive metric we have in STHS, and boy, it's not nice to the S75 Playoff DC Dragons. Top defender Luciano Valentino finished the ploffs -3. Again, we won the Vancouver series +1 and the Chicago go -2. Rookie defender Jackson Philliefan - who would not have been in the lineup if Walker was on the team - finished a team worst -5. Remember, Malmo won the series because DC as a whole went -4. Ricky Johnson, the other first pair defender, finished -2 too. Only Ove Dyrdahl, the goon on the back end, finished in the positive with +2. It has to be mentioned, B-DCD-D1 also finished +1 averaging four minutes a game. Adding Tyler Walker to the roster would have bumped Philliefan off the roster, and bought some breathing room for Valentino and Johnson.

 

In conclusion...

Eno drafted with his heart instead of his brain in S73. Gifted with the top overall pick, his team needed a defender to fill the holes that were about to pop up. The forward corps was set and included past, present, and future trophy winners and finalists. Their goalie of the future was set. All they needed was a top defender to get them to the next level. The first overall pick was wasted on yet-another unproven first-gen. While Groovy Dood was one of the gambles Eno hit on, straying from his first-gen-only philosophy would have been the bigger gamble and the bigger payoff. He should have drafted Tyler Walker instead.

 

Tyler Walker would have put the S75 DC Dragons over the top. Entering his prime, he would have shut down the other team better than two rookie defenders. Preventing even one more goal per game would have turned the Dragons from great to excellent and changed the past, present, and future of the franchise around. Winning begets winning, and maybe S75 Free Agent Dakota Lamb would've chosen DC instead of Warsaw. Maybe DC wouldn't have traded up and then down to grab legendary first-round bust Caitlyn Catowize in the S76 draft. Maybe Eno could've enacted a large scale rebuild once his stars retired, content to be a winner and not need to go all-in on an aging core to get that elusive 'chip. Advantage isn't the super-earner he once was, or that bigAL is, but his player would have been the missing piece the S75 DC Dragons needed.

 

So, the overarching question needs an answer. What if Eno had a brain?

Spoiler

insert someone's sick S75 DC Champions banner

 

1966 words, but to hell with getting to 2000, I now have 6 weeks worth of claims in the bank.

 

[BarzalGoat 728]

14 minutes ago, bigAL said:

- Super prospect Xavier Laflamant

Is this tampering  

 

--edit to mention that X was an aging 3rd round pick and definitely not a super prospect

Edited April 12, 2021 by BarzalGoat
clarifying the grooviest exaggeration in the article

[Banackock 8,073]

[bigAL 2,176]

15 minutes ago, BarzalGoat said:

Is this tampering  

 

--edit to mention that X was an aging 3rd round pick and definitely not a super prospect

Heh that was the S72 roster, and you're a prospect who is just a super guy so that makes you a super prospect

[bigAL 2,176]

2 minutes ago, Sonnet said:

Joking aside, what a fucking read. Quality fucking content, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised when it's coming from you.

Thanks dude, I like to make words with my mouth and my fingers. It's great when you can write serious things without taking it very seriously at all. If you make work fun, you'll never work for TPE in your life!

[KC15 340]

Review - Absolutely delightful read!  Love the tongue-in-cheek humor all the while putting out some great analysis.  And the graphics just give it that extra punch.  Only one quibble.  I'm glad we got Dood and not Walker.  lol  9/10

[bigAL 2,176]

31 minutes ago, KC15 said:

Only one quibble.  I'm glad we got Dood and not Walker. 

Me too, I wouldn't trade our run for anything! Cheers KC!

Edited April 12, 2021 by bigAL

[Enorama 2,038]

7 hours ago, bigAL said:

It's true: in the six drafts since DC has come into the league via expansion

 

TIL S68 through S77 is just 6 drafts

 

To continue your analysis though across first rounds:
S68: Luciano Valentino (first gen)

S69: Benny Graves (actually one of the only two established members I've ever selected early) + Guy Lesieur (first gen)

S70: No 1st

S71: Stone Wolski (the other established member)

[bigAL 2,176]

Just now, Enorama said:

 

TIL S68 through S77 is just 6 drafts

 

To continue your analysis though across first rounds:
S68: Luciano Valentino (first gen)

S69: Benny Graves (actually one of the only two established members I've ever selected early) + Guy Lesieur (first gen)

S70: No 1st

S71: Stone Wolski (the other established member)

Oh yes of course, I should've prefaced the article with the fact that I was only looking at S72+ because that's when I got here, ergo that's the only timeframe that matters.

and not mention that I thought the DC expansion was S72 and was too Monday dum to fact check that

[Garsh 1,193]

[Mike 708]

He traded for me then signed me to a long term deal verdict:

No brain lol

[STZ 5,363]

I'm a first gen at heart

[diamond_ace 3,112]

On 4/12/2021 at 6:53 PM, bigAL said:

Oh yes of course, I should've prefaced the article with the fact that I was only looking at S72+ because that's when I got here, ergo that's the only timeframe that matters.

and not mention that I thought the DC expansion was S72 and was too Monday dum to fact check that

Yeah DC came in the same year Prague came in - we actually both had really solid drafts in 68 despite ending up with picks 11 and 12 which was just the dumbest thing imaginable...

[fonziGG 1,068]

I just want to quickly mention that at the time, both @Enoramaand I unanimously wanted to draft you with our pick even before we spoke about it, let alone won 1st overall. Sure, no disrespect to some of the players you mentioned but we both believed in you as a user.

 

So uh, I think Eno has a brain

[tinafrombobsburgers 367]

This is a great read! Really loved the layout and the humour throughout! Your spacing and fonts were perfect and really made it easy to read and feel like I was there throughout the whole story! 10/10

[bigAL 2,176]

sorry for the notification everyone, just me claiming it again 2/3

[bigAL 2,176]

Last one I promise