BOOM

So I am back. For those who don't know I was away for a week in Fiji and there was essentially no internet so it was easier to essentially ignore the VHL. The unfortunate thing was that the week before I was swamped with work and packing and extremely sick including a trip to the hospital for some scans. So I feel horrible that I have essentially not been 100% active as a vhlm GM but I am back now and luckily the draft hasn't yet happened.
 
Speaking of drafts Gustav Mattias went 20th to the Seattle bears and was also drafted to Vadteras 16th overall in the VHLE draft.
 
So I don't really have the brain capacity to write a full media spot this week so my update here is just going to be a.com article.
 
But as a sneak peak there has been talks about Berocka starting a new podcast and maybe have another host. This hasn't been completely finalised but there are talks so stay
tuned.

That's not what your scouting email suggests!

That's not what your scouting email suggests!

I misclicked, I swear!

Click bait. You knew I'd open it! 

I like Adidas. Fuck off. 

Player Information
Username: BOOM
Player Name: Adi Dassler
Recruited From: Returning
Age: 21
Position: LW
Height: 74 in.
Weight: 205 lbs.
Birthplace: Germany

Player Page
@VHLM GM

The VHLM dispersal draft is coming, and this is my first time that I will have been drafted into the VHLM.  My first gen player, Brian Payne joined San Diego as a free agent too late to be drafted so I am a little excited to see where old Logan Ninefingers ends up.  
 
Dinking around with the draft page today I see the player list.  In the #1 spot is Phillip Rave with 225 TPE (25 banked) so not sure if he’s playing in M or E next season.  Number 2 spot is George Richmond @badcolethetitan.  Badcole is a TPE earning beast so I am sure Richmond will be in the #1 or 2 spot if he decides to stay in the M. #2 spot for TPE is my player with 172.  Vanellope von Schweetz @Arce is # 4 with 163.  
 
Now I am not sure if that will reflect that exact position in the draft as some most of the top 15 in TPE will be at max toward the beginning of the season so they would all be quality picks.  Plus, there is a lot of veteran talent VHL wise in the S92 so it’s anyone’s guess who can go in certain spots of the draft.  
 
Anyway I am pumped to see how it shakes out. 

Probably applies just as well! 

What type of player do you have or working towards? Role model, enforcer?
 
I'm unsure of this yet. I'm just concentrating on earning and will eventually pick a path.
 
The team is going to be young and grow together. I like this idea, do you?
 
Well in theory it's nice and as long as management can keep users invested, it may work.
 
What is the one thing our GM needs to improve in the locker room?
 
More titty posts wouldn't hurt. I feel like I'm in a Mormon chat room.
 
What motivates you to even be in this league? I like to make new friends.
 
Well now that you've asked that, I may need to consider how much time I waste here. Retirement post incoming.
 
Do you have any plans during the off-season break?
 
None whatsoever. Once my team is out of the playoffs, my brain hibernates from all things VHL except for getting my TPE earnt.
 
What is a bad habit you want to stop doing?
 
Staring at boobs in public.

we all did, BOOM, we all did... I mean who does not click on HOF-Boobs?

True. I have terabytes of them that are HOF worthy. 

Click bait. You knew I'd open it! 

Is this still on the table?

What are your expectations for this upcoming season with a few new rookies moving up to the team?
 
The team may continue to struggle, but will trend in the right direction for a successful re-build sooner rather than later.
 
Are you a team player or a stat chaser, or both?
 
I trend towards stat chaser, but recognize that sometimes sacrifices need to be made in order for the team to remain strong.
 
Spartan seems to have the team well organized and he is on top of everything. What would you like him to change or not change?
 
I tend to believe in the old adage, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
 
Who is the practical joker in the locker room?
 
Hmmm, hard to say, but I know that the Menace LR will always be entertaining and active.
 
How many seasons will it take Moscow to become and dominate force and a cup holder?
 
I'd say within the next 2 seasons, Moscow will be contending in Europe and maybe another season later, be in the Playoffs.
 
Pink or brown? Yes, how do you like your steak?
 
Brown. I know that's possibly unpopular, but I can't stand the sight of blood coming out of a cut of meat that's ready for consumption. I'm also glad that you clarified your question. 😬

1. We are officially out of the playoffs. How do you plan on spending your offseason?
 
Getting drunk and tanking my draft stock.
 
2. Is there anyone that you're rooting for in this playoffs now? Any friends that you're supporting in the playoffs?
 
Friends? Who has time for friends in the VHL. It's dog eat dog in this place and I'm an Alpha.
 
3. Moscow is confirmed to have 2 picks in the top 6 of the draft this season. What rituals will you perform so that Moscow moves up in the lottery?
 
I already have a stockpile of Menace Voodoo dolls left over from last season.
 
4. Are there any players or positions you hope Moscow drafts this season?
 
I don't paid enough(at all to be fair) to make those kind of decisions.
 
5. Prospects Axle Gunner, Jarmo Ruutu and Obuz Schneider Canet du Bocage are all poised to come up to the VHL this offseason. What expectations do you have for these youth players as they join the pro roster?
 
If they don't instantly take Moscow back to the playoffs, then they will have failed miserably.
 
6. Wrong answers ONLY: How do I cope with the Pittsburgh Steelers being a terrible NFL team?
 
Root for the Chiefs, err I mean the Kansas City Swifts. FFS, am I over that shit.

VHLM Dispersal Draft Outlook
With the VHLM Season just a week or so away from seeing a new Founder Cup champion crowned, in this week’s article, we will take a way too early look ahead at what the VHLM Dispersal Draft may look like with the current eligible players. With eight of the ten VHLM franchises currently holding onto their own first round draft choice, the draft order may look a little different come draft day, but we will look at the picks based on current regular season standings.
Ottawa Lynx:

Ottawa has had a rough go of it recently in the VHLM, being at or near the bottom of the standings the last three VHLM seasons. This is one pick I could see moving prior to the VHLM draft, as Ottawa currently holds only six total picks in the draft, with only two of those picks coming in the first two rounds. Regardless if the pick is moved or not, we believe the consensus First Overall pick in the VHLM draft would currently be Phillip Rave. After joining the league after the Season Ninety VHLM Dispersal Draft, Rave signed to play for the San Diego Marlins, where he was able to play in all seventy-two games for the Marlins this past season. Rave was a point per game player for the Marlins this season, putting up thirty-three goals and forty-one assists, helping San Diego to a first-place finish in the VHLMs Western Conference. With Rave being well ahead in the TPE race, it’s a very high likelihood Rave will see his name forever on the poral as the First Overall Pick of the S91 VHLM Dispersal Draft.
Houston Bulls:

Houston is one of two VHLM franchises that have a second first round pick, Mississauga’s First Round pick, which they picked up in a trade with Saskatoon his past season. Currently Houston does not have any defenseman on their roster, which is the reason we believe they will jump at the chance to draft the top defenseman currently in the VHLM Dispersal Draft, which happens to be Vanellope von Schweetz. Von Schweetz was a trade deadline re-create arrival in the VHLM this season, where he signed with the Marlins. The Greenland native was able to play in twenty games with the Marlins after signing with the club, where he put up ten assists in those twenty-games. Von Schweetz and the Marlins are currently playing in the VHLM playoffs, where he has been able to show off more of his play, putting up three goals and seven assists in nine playoff games. If the Bulls in fact do go defense with a top two pick in the VHLM Dispersal Draft, they surely won’t be disappointed with von Schweetz.
Halifax 21st:

Halifax did manage to sneak into the playoffs in Season Ninety, as the eighth and final seed for the VHLM playoffs. Halifax took on the San Diego Marlins in the and were unfortunate swept in four games in the VHLM Quarter Finals. Halifax had a few maxed-out earners on the roster in Season Ninety, some of which are likely to move onto the VHLE, which will leave some areas of the roster to work on for Halifax General Manger. With most of those losses likely to come in their forward group, we can see the 21st tuning their attention that way in the draft and selecting American winger, Logan Ninefingers. Ninefingers was another trade deadline re-create that joined the VHLM, so he was only able to showcase his abilities in eighteen games with the Miami Marauders. In the eighteen games Ninefingers dressed for, couldn't really showcase what he could do, putting up three goals and three assists. With a strong agency and strong practice history, we believe teams would be more than willing to look past such a small sample size of Ninefingers low offensive numbers.
 
Mexico City Kings:

Next on the reverse regular season standings list is the Mexico City Kings. Mexico like Halifax snuck into the playoffs, where the lined up against the Mississauga Hounds. Mexico put up a valiant effort but was unable to knock off the Hounds, eventually losing in five games. Mexico also appears to have some players that will be graduating out of the VHLM but looks to bring back most of their roster outside possibly Justin Chen and Mina. With no top end centerman likely to return to Mexico in Season Ninety- One, out not so educated guess has us leaning Mexico picking up George Richmond with their First-Round pick. Richmond just finished up his season, playing the last nineteen games of the regular season and their six playoff games series with the Las Vegas Aces. Richmond really hit the ground running after joining the Aces club at the VHL trade deadline, putting up a point per game, with six goals and eleven assists. Richmond has been a consistent TPE earner since joining the league as a re-create, something the VHLM General Managers will likely take notice of, which may allow Richmond to go higher than Fourth Overall.
Philadelphia Reapers:

Philadelphia made their intentions clear early in the season, when they traded away Eno Velvson to Miami just thirteen games in the VHLM season. Philadelphia clawed and scratched their way to the playoffs after the trade that brought them in additional draft picks for the Season Ninety-One VHLM Dispersal Draft. Currently is looks as if the Reapers will return their two defenders that played on the team in Season Ninety, so we can see the Reapers looking towards the forwards come draft day. We believe the Reapers will select the French born forward Nico Belique. Belique put together good tape for the draft process in his seventy-two games played with the Miami Marauders, as the young forward put up twenty-one goals and forty-two assists in his first go around in the VHLM. Miami and Belique are currently fighting for their lives in the VHLM playoffs, and Belique is doing everything in his power to help the team move onto the next round, as he has put up eight points in the eleven playoffs games. The Reapers would be hard pressed to select a different player if Belique is on the board when they step up to the podium.
Philadelphia Reapers (From Miami Marauders):

Philadelphia may be lucky enough to have back-to-back draft choices right smack down in the middle VHLM Dispersal Draft. After dipping into the forward pool with their own draft choice, we believe Philadelphia will dip back into the pool and select forward Adi Dassler from Germany. Another trade deadline re-create, Dassler comes from a very reputable VHL Agency, something that may allow Dassler to jump ahead of other prospects in the draft. Dassler didn’t preform in the regular season like many including himself would have hoped, as he managed only one point in the fourteen games he played in San Diego. With an entire off-season or practice and improving ahead for the left-winger, we can’t foresee a VHLM General Manager passing up selecting Dassler if he’s still available when they select in the first round.
 
Las Vegas Aces:

Next on the list is the Las Vegas Aces, who are coming off what would be described as a less than expected playoff series against the Miami Marauders. After being bounced in the Quarter Finals in six games, the Aces likely switched their focus to the off-season and what they can do to take the next step. With their current goalie, Dalkr Vidarsson likely to move onto the VHLE next season, selecting his predecessor in Giorgiy Constanzov would be a giant step in the right direction. Although Constanzov doesn’t have much VHLM experience under his belt after joining the Miami Marauders during the VHL trade deadline, where he only saw action in five games, Contanzov is by far the bet goalie prospect in the VHLM Dispersal Draft. Constanzov is another prospect from the Mongoose agency, who’s lastest VHLer Jasmes Teekrique is about to retire after a point per game career with HC Davos Dynamo, so VHLM General Managers are well aware of the quality of player they would expect from this agency. The only real question remains, will Costanzov still be available at the back half of the First Round?
 
Saskatoon Wild:

When Saskatoon is called to the podium for the first time, the Wild will likely be looking at a roster that is quite depleted by graduating players into the VHLE. Seven of their current roster players sit at 199 TPE of higher, which is a major part of their roster that carried them to a 104-point season. Saskatoon was just bounced from the playoffs in their Semi-Finals match-up against the Mississauga Hounds and will be looking to add to their few returning players to take a shot once again at the Founders Cup. After a great regular season and deep playoff run, the only issue is you’ll find yourself near the bottom of the draft, but we still believe Saskatoon will get a quality player in sixteen-year-old forward Olumide Anderson. Anderson who stands at closer to seven feet than six feet, spent the season playing for the Halifax 21st. Although he wasn’t the highest TPA player on the roster in Halifax, Anderson played a key role for the team, putting up seventy-two points, including twenty-eight goals in the sixty-three games he played this past season. Anderson continued his point per game performance in the playoffs, as he led the way in assists and points for the 21st in their four playoff games with four assists and six points. With Anderson on board in Saskatoon, the Wild should have no problems putting the puck in the back of the net.
 
Houston Bulls (From Saskatoon; From Mississauga Hounds):

Houston is back on the clock after their trade with Saskatoon that saw Season Ninety-One VHL Entry Draft Eligible Joshua Schwarzer head over to Saskatoon for their run to the playoffs. After we predicted the Bulls going with a defenseman with the Second Overall pick, we believe the Bulls will now look to add to their forward core with another Greenland born player in this draft, Dietrich Reingaard. With 199 TPE earned so far since joining the VHLM just under two months ago, Reingaard could be a player that might see more than one season in the VHLM, which may intrigue the Bulls enough to select him for a longer turn around. Reingaard is another VHLM draft eligible player that played this last season with the San Diego Marlins, a team that was a very loaded roster with good depth. With all the roster players, which included 8 forwards, Reingaard didn’t see the ice-time that other prospects might have, but still put up a respectable twenty-eight points to go along with 132 hits in seventy-two games played. If Houston was to add the younger Reingaard to their roster through the draft, we don’t think they will be disappointed come seasons’ end.
San Diego Marlins:

Of course, the playoffs are yet to be decided, but the Marlins might be on their way to having the last draft pick in the First Round, as they currently hold a 3-2 led in the VHLM Semi-Finals against Miami. If they do go on to win and then take home the Founders Cup, they might not be holding onto this pick come draft time, as they may be heading into a retool after a very successful season. With a lot of depth pieces available in the draft on the defensive side of the rink, we believe the Marlins will take the chance to retool their defense with the selection of Vlad Von Carstein, the twenty-five-year-old defenseman from Germany. The last pick in our way to early mock draft was surprise; another trade deadline re-create. Carstein comes to the VHL via the Dom agency, whose previous player Igor Molotov is going to retire at the conclusion of the season after eight-year career split between Malmo and London. Hopefully Carstein can have the same impact in a short time with San Diego as Molotov did in his long VHL career.
 
2,021 Words
(4 Weeks October 8, October 15, October 22 and October 29)

@Will3

 

Some more motion graphics work!  Doing it in Photoshop is not the easiest but I am learning.  To Igor Molotov!
 
 

I have called crime stoppers hotline with details of at least two of the offenders. 

It's OK. I just called Queensland Police and explained who you are, and that you probably own the restaurant. 
 
You'll be fine. 

I have called crime stoppers hotline with details of at least two of the offenders.