Zero

Zero's Podcast #2: https://soundcloud.com/detectivezero/vhl-podcast-2-solo
 
I mostly ramble on about the league, and answer some questions from those of you who asked them. Enjoy

And that is where we disagree. The VHLM should be in itself a good experience and part of the fun nature of the entire site. Its not just a meat grinding process that spits out extra tpe for no reason. the VHLM is the make or break phase for most new players because thats where they will be for a season or 2 and if they don't enjoy it here, they won't make it to the VHLM.
 
By and large, to get players to the VHL, we have to ensure they develop here and in the VHLM have a good experience so they can continue playing and going on. If its hell for them, don't expect any first gens to stay.

The VHLM's always been somewhat of a "too much to one extreme", even back in the old days. Whatever new system is put in, GMs will find a way to exploit it and make things great for people on good teams, and shitty for people on bad teams. It's good that people are still working on making things better.
 
I'm not opposed to the idea of contraction provided it's not just erasing two teams and maintaining the status quo. Restricting the trade of draft picks is a nice idea that actually makes sense.
 
Maybe even have an allocation order instead of waiver claims, where players are just added to the first team in line, and that team then moves to the back of the line. Every team gets new players coming in, and hopefully everyone gets new members in their LRs.
 
Also some of you are arguing and acting like whores and its not at all swell.

Back in my day, consecutive cup wins made you a dynasty.
 
None of this "2 in 3", "5 in 16" bullcrap you sissypants fucks have today.
 
Get off my lawn.

Ooh, those are good ones.

Utterly shocked you didn't go for the Vietnamese dong, but hey, I learn something new about you every day.
 
I also laughed when you played the Danny Phantom theme song. Thanks for that.
 
I did a solo podcast, but am always open to friends coming in or me joining friends. I believe we have podcasted together in the past, yes.
 
Sorry to hear about your aunt.

BITCH
FUCKING
HIGGINS

Bitchord Shock

So, the fun of the name has sort of worn off, and much like I did with my last player, Penis Anthony Doubligné, who became Penis Anthony Hudson, I'm wondering if it's time for Bitch Higgins to change his name to something a little less Bitchy. That said, I am nothing if not a man of the people, and I propose that I put this up to a vote. Therefore, consider this thread as being the official polling station, with the question being: "should I change the name of Bitch Higgins?" From there, I'll probably come up with a few different names, and we'll put it to a vote. I see that we already have a Gifford Shock in the league (thanks Noah), so I can already throw that one out as an option.
 
Or, of course, I can keep the name Bitch Higgins, and do his namesake proud by making the Bitch as special a player as I possibly can. I'm pretty ambivalent towards it all, so let's see what the general public has to say. Since the playoffs are so long (lol), I figure we have some time to kill, anyway, and since Yukon is out the VHLM race, then nobody really cares about the rest of the teams that are still playing.

When and where, big boy

Didn't your articles used to not suck. That was 500 words to suggest what we already do you scrub

Boy did I not expect this to turn into a serious discussion.

Its really interesting that you note this because for a while, Coach Terence Fong was coaching Davos through the Kanou years I believe I had requested Jardy to name the Davos coach when I started Kanou there
 
I think we did like a test sim or something with coaches turned on and auto simmed a season too somewhere along the line because I wanted to see if people would be interested in creating "coaches" rather than players or as a side character.
 
On another note, HAI Zero, I missed your articles bru!

No, seriously. I was really bored just now and was looking through the league index page. As it turns out, there is an entire section filled with coaches, if they can even be called that, since they are all unemployed. What's even more interesting is that some of these coaches are former VHL players, such as the geriatric Marrko St. Urho who is 71 years old (which, when you assume that every VHL season is one calendar year for our players, isn't too far from being pretty accurate), and the clear-cut best coach of all-time, Terence Fong, who somehow makes $69 per year for 0 years. As an Asian man, I would expect Mr. Fong to be a little better at math, because $69 x 0 is still 0, you dingus.
 
There's Grimm Jonsson, who apparently hasn't aged at all at age 32. It's odd because he may have played at the same time as Marrko St. Urho, who's old enough to be his dad. What's even going on? Oh, and there's Sterling Labatte, who apparently followed up on a brilliant VHL career with a significantly less brilliant lobotomy, judging by his '1' ranking in every attribute. Like, my dog's amputated toe could be a better coach than him (coincidentally, the toe's in talks to coach the Helsinki Titans next season because nobody else is willing to do it).
 
Oh, and there's Nigel Niggerman from Nigeria. I don't think he was ever a VHL player, and I also doubt that this man is a real person, otherwise I'd love to see the etymology behind that last name - like how the Millers were actual millers back in the day - what is the history of House Niggerman? Funnily enough, my auto-correct keeps switching 'Niggerman' to 'Nigerian', which also strikes me as pretty racist in and of itself.
 
I could go on, but I won't. I was just bumfuck stunned that this existed.

No, seriously. I was really bored just now and was looking through the league index page. As it turns out, there is an entire section filled with coaches, if they can even be called that, since they are all unemployed. What's even more interesting is that some of these coaches are former VHL players, such as the geriatric Marrko St. Urho who is 71 years old (which, when you assume that every VHL season is one calendar year for our players, isn't too far from being pretty accurate), and the clear-cut best coach of all-time, Terence Fong, who somehow makes $69 per year for 0 years. As an Asian man, I would expect Mr. Fong to be a little better at math, because $69 x 0 is still 0, you dingus.
 
There's Grimm Jonsson, who apparently hasn't aged at all at age 32. It's odd because he may have played at the same time as Marrko St. Urho, who's old enough to be his dad. What's even going on? Oh, and there's Sterling Labatte, who apparently followed up on a brilliant VHL career with a significantly less brilliant lobotomy, judging by his '1' ranking in every attribute. Like, my dog's amputated toe could be a better coach than him (coincidentally, the toe's in talks to coach the Helsinki Titans next season because nobody else is willing to do it).
 
Oh, and there's Nigel Niggerman from Nigeria. I don't think he was ever a VHL player, and I also doubt that this man is a real person, otherwise I'd love to see the etymology behind that last name - like how the Millers were actual millers back in the day - what is the history of House Niggerman? Funnily enough, my auto-correct keeps switching 'Niggerman' to 'Nigerian', which also strikes me as pretty racist in and of itself.
 
I could go on, but I won't. I was just bumfuck stunned that this existed.

No, seriously. I was really bored just now and was looking through the league index page. As it turns out, there is an entire section filled with coaches, if they can even be called that, since they are all unemployed. What's even more interesting is that some of these coaches are former VHL players, such as the geriatric Marrko St. Urho who is 71 years old (which, when you assume that every VHL season is one calendar year for our players, isn't too far from being pretty accurate), and the clear-cut best coach of all-time, Terence Fong, who somehow makes $69 per year for 0 years. As an Asian man, I would expect Mr. Fong to be a little better at math, because $69 x 0 is still 0, you dingus.
 
There's Grimm Jonsson, who apparently hasn't aged at all at age 32. It's odd because he may have played at the same time as Marrko St. Urho, who's old enough to be his dad. What's even going on? Oh, and there's Sterling Labatte, who apparently followed up on a brilliant VHL career with a significantly less brilliant lobotomy, judging by his '1' ranking in every attribute. Like, my dog's amputated toe could be a better coach than him (coincidentally, the toe's in talks to coach the Helsinki Titans next season because nobody else is willing to do it).
 
Oh, and there's Nigel Niggerman from Nigeria. I don't think he was ever a VHL player, and I also doubt that this man is a real person, otherwise I'd love to see the etymology behind that last name - like how the Millers were actual millers back in the day - what is the history of House Niggerman? Funnily enough, my auto-correct keeps switching 'Niggerman' to 'Nigerian', which also strikes me as pretty racist in and of itself.
 
I could go on, but I won't. I was just bumfuck stunned that this existed.

My 8 PIM was a bit too Bitchy of me. I'll try and tone it down next game.
 
No promises though since I'm obviously a Punk Bitch

http://www28.zippyshare.com/v/eXCfeKue/file.html
 
Basic stuff: league recap and I answer my questions. Enjoy

MY HEART HURTS
 
Those who know me and my history would agree that of my numerous VHL players, J.D. Stormwall stands above the rest, and I'd agree with them. He had the individual accolades, he had the team success, and he was a well-respected leader and proven winner who rightfully earned his place in the VHL Hall of Fame about 20 seasons ago. Many would also agree that aside from Stormwall, my player resume isn't all that impressive. Jon Church had promise, but was ultimately doomed to fail. The same can be said for Wesley Kanaan, and I don't think Jensen Bracken ever had much hope to become anything great. As for Penis Anthony Doubligné/Hudson, he was more for the laughs than anything else. I hope to change that with Bitch Higgins.
 

 
There's one name I left out, and that would be the one time I ever built a goalie: Dominik Stryker. If many of you are seeing this name for the first time, I would not be surprised because he retired almost 30 seasons ago, and never had the individual accolades or Hall of Fame induction that would immortalize him in VHL lore. However, my heart still hurts when I look back and reflect on how Stryker's career would have gone had he not been stuck on Helsinki for the majority of his career.
 
In Season 6, Dominik Stryker was drafted 2nd overall to the Helsinki Titans, where we promptly won a Continental Cup in the following season. After that, the GM at the time, falco (Daric Radmonovic) handed the reigns over to me, and both he and just about everyone else on that team who was good was either traded away, left via free agency, or retired except for Dominik Stryker. Stryker barely saw any playoffs action until I stepped down as GM several seasons later (I want to say Season 12) and Stryker was traded to the New York Americans in what would be his final year. After that, I retired him and went on with Stormwall.
 

 
I guess I've always wondered about how good of a career Stryker could have had if I declined to take the GM position in Helsinki, and if someone more competent at the job had been in charge. If you want an idea of how alone Stryker often was on some of those Helsinki teams, take a look at the all-time stats. At the time of his retirement, nobody had faced more shots than Dominik Stryker's 18,697. Today, I learned that not only does that record still stand today, but that no goalie has even come close to touching it. 2nd all-time behind Stryker is Remy LeBeau at 16,564 - more than 2,000 shots less in about 60 more games than Stryker ever played. Yet still, with so many shots faced, Stryker's save percentage is 7th all-time with a .924, behind no less than three Hall of Fame goalies (Benoit Devereux, CAL G, Tuomas Tukio), and ahead of many others.
 
That said, aside from the Continental Cup run in Season 6 (and a Founder's Cup win with the now defunct Toledo Scorpions in Season 5, earning him the Esposito/Skylar Rift trophy), Stryker never managed to fill up his trophy case. He has 20 career playoffs games to his name, most of which came in that first Continental Cup run, and as good as he was, he was never the best in the league in any given season. Plus, again, he just wasn't on many good teams. His 215 losses rank him 4th all-time, but every goalie ahead of him as a save percentage of .910 or less. His goals against average of 3.24 is 64th all-time, which is terrible yet understandable, and his 188 wins place him 27th. At the end of the day, those stats, while being more team-focused, just aren't very good.
 

 
I don't really know why I wrote this, or why I'm only claiming 2 points for it (really relying on that podcast I guess) but I just feel it was a long time coming. There aren't even that many people left in this league who would remember those days, that are now around 6 years ago, but still, I think this was cathartic to write. I don't expect any HOF nominations to come out of the woodwork, nor do I think Stryker deserves them, but I do think he was - and still is - underrated, and was definitely overshadowed by some terrible teams where he was often the only one showing up to work. Though he's not a real person, I'm hoping old Dominik is reading this in his rocking chair up in Bavaria, Germany and smiling, feeling the silent vindication he's been longing for, but again, he's not a real person so...probably not going to happen.
 
THE END

MY HEART HURTS
 
Those who know me and my history would agree that of my numerous VHL players, J.D. Stormwall stands above the rest, and I'd agree with them. He had the individual accolades, he had the team success, and he was a well-respected leader and proven winner who rightfully earned his place in the VHL Hall of Fame about 20 seasons ago. Many would also agree that aside from Stormwall, my player resume isn't all that impressive. Jon Church had promise, but was ultimately doomed to fail. The same can be said for Wesley Kanaan, and I don't think Jensen Bracken ever had much hope to become anything great. As for Penis Anthony Doubligné/Hudson, he was more for the laughs than anything else. I hope to change that with Bitch Higgins.
 

 
There's one name I left out, and that would be the one time I ever built a goalie: Dominik Stryker. If many of you are seeing this name for the first time, I would not be surprised because he retired almost 30 seasons ago, and never had the individual accolades or Hall of Fame induction that would immortalize him in VHL lore. However, my heart still hurts when I look back and reflect on how Stryker's career would have gone had he not been stuck on Helsinki for the majority of his career.
 
In Season 6, Dominik Stryker was drafted 2nd overall to the Helsinki Titans, where we promptly won a Continental Cup in the following season. After that, the GM at the time, falco (Daric Radmonovic) handed the reigns over to me, and both he and just about everyone else on that team who was good was either traded away, left via free agency, or retired except for Dominik Stryker. Stryker barely saw any playoffs action until I stepped down as GM several seasons later (I want to say Season 12) and Stryker was traded to the New York Americans in what would be his final year. After that, I retired him and went on with Stormwall.
 

 
I guess I've always wondered about how good of a career Stryker could have had if I declined to take the GM position in Helsinki, and if someone more competent at the job had been in charge. If you want an idea of how alone Stryker often was on some of those Helsinki teams, take a look at the all-time stats. At the time of his retirement, nobody had faced more shots than Dominik Stryker's 18,697. Today, I learned that not only does that record still stand today, but that no goalie has even come close to touching it. 2nd all-time behind Stryker is Remy LeBeau at 16,564 - more than 2,000 shots less in about 60 more games than Stryker ever played. Yet still, with so many shots faced, Stryker's save percentage is 7th all-time with a .924, behind no less than three Hall of Fame goalies (Benoit Devereux, CAL G, Tuomas Tukio), and ahead of many others.
 
That said, aside from the Continental Cup run in Season 6 (and a Founder's Cup win with the now defunct Toledo Scorpions in Season 5, earning him the Esposito/Skylar Rift trophy), Stryker never managed to fill up his trophy case. He has 20 career playoffs games to his name, most of which came in that first Continental Cup run, and as good as he was, he was never the best in the league in any given season. Plus, again, he just wasn't on many good teams. His 215 losses rank him 4th all-time, but every goalie ahead of him as a save percentage of .910 or less. His goals against average of 3.24 is 64th all-time, which is terrible yet understandable, and his 188 wins place him 27th. At the end of the day, those stats, while being more team-focused, just aren't very good.
 

 
I don't really know why I wrote this, or why I'm only claiming 2 points for it (really relying on that podcast I guess) but I just feel it was a long time coming. There aren't even that many people left in this league who would remember those days, that are now around 6 years ago, but still, I think this was cathartic to write. I don't expect any HOF nominations to come out of the woodwork, nor do I think Stryker deserves them, but I do think he was - and still is - underrated, and was definitely overshadowed by some terrible teams where he was often the only one showing up to work. Though he's not a real person, I'm hoping old Dominik is reading this in his rocking chair up in Bavaria, Germany and smiling, feeling the silent vindication he's been longing for, but again, he's not a real person so...probably not going to happen.
 
THE END

MY HEART HURTS
 
Those who know me and my history would agree that of my numerous VHL players, J.D. Stormwall stands above the rest, and I'd agree with them. He had the individual accolades, he had the team success, and he was a well-respected leader and proven winner who rightfully earned his place in the VHL Hall of Fame about 20 seasons ago. Many would also agree that aside from Stormwall, my player resume isn't all that impressive. Jon Church had promise, but was ultimately doomed to fail. The same can be said for Wesley Kanaan, and I don't think Jensen Bracken ever had much hope to become anything great. As for Penis Anthony Doubligné/Hudson, he was more for the laughs than anything else. I hope to change that with Bitch Higgins.
 

 
There's one name I left out, and that would be the one time I ever built a goalie: Dominik Stryker. If many of you are seeing this name for the first time, I would not be surprised because he retired almost 30 seasons ago, and never had the individual accolades or Hall of Fame induction that would immortalize him in VHL lore. However, my heart still hurts when I look back and reflect on how Stryker's career would have gone had he not been stuck on Helsinki for the majority of his career.
 
In Season 6, Dominik Stryker was drafted 2nd overall to the Helsinki Titans, where we promptly won a Continental Cup in the following season. After that, the GM at the time, falco (Daric Radmonovic) handed the reigns over to me, and both he and just about everyone else on that team who was good was either traded away, left via free agency, or retired except for Dominik Stryker. Stryker barely saw any playoffs action until I stepped down as GM several seasons later (I want to say Season 12) and Stryker was traded to the New York Americans in what would be his final year. After that, I retired him and went on with Stormwall.
 

 
I guess I've always wondered about how good of a career Stryker could have had if I declined to take the GM position in Helsinki, and if someone more competent at the job had been in charge. If you want an idea of how alone Stryker often was on some of those Helsinki teams, take a look at the all-time stats. At the time of his retirement, nobody had faced more shots than Dominik Stryker's 18,697. Today, I learned that not only does that record still stand today, but that no goalie has even come close to touching it. 2nd all-time behind Stryker is Remy LeBeau at 16,564 - more than 2,000 shots less in about 60 more games than Stryker ever played. Yet still, with so many shots faced, Stryker's save percentage is 7th all-time with a .924, behind no less than three Hall of Fame goalies (Benoit Devereux, CAL G, Tuomas Tukio), and ahead of many others.
 
That said, aside from the Continental Cup run in Season 6 (and a Founder's Cup win with the now defunct Toledo Scorpions in Season 5, earning him the Esposito/Skylar Rift trophy), Stryker never managed to fill up his trophy case. He has 20 career playoffs games to his name, most of which came in that first Continental Cup run, and as good as he was, he was never the best in the league in any given season. Plus, again, he just wasn't on many good teams. His 215 losses rank him 4th all-time, but every goalie ahead of him as a save percentage of .910 or less. His goals against average of 3.24 is 64th all-time, which is terrible yet understandable, and his 188 wins place him 27th. At the end of the day, those stats, while being more team-focused, just aren't very good.
 

 
I don't really know why I wrote this, or why I'm only claiming 2 points for it (really relying on that podcast I guess) but I just feel it was a long time coming. There aren't even that many people left in this league who would remember those days, that are now around 6 years ago, but still, I think this was cathartic to write. I don't expect any HOF nominations to come out of the woodwork, nor do I think Stryker deserves them, but I do think he was - and still is - underrated, and was definitely overshadowed by some terrible teams where he was often the only one showing up to work. Though he's not a real person, I'm hoping old Dominik is reading this in his rocking chair up in Bavaria, Germany and smiling, feeling the silent vindication he's been longing for, but again, he's not a real person so...probably not going to happen.
 
THE END

I've seen this before

MY HEART HURTS
 
Those who know me and my history would agree that of my numerous VHL players, J.D. Stormwall stands above the rest, and I'd agree with them. He had the individual accolades, he had the team success, and he was a well-respected leader and proven winner who rightfully earned his place in the VHL Hall of Fame about 20 seasons ago. Many would also agree that aside from Stormwall, my player resume isn't all that impressive. Jon Church had promise, but was ultimately doomed to fail. The same can be said for Wesley Kanaan, and I don't think Jensen Bracken ever had much hope to become anything great. As for Penis Anthony Doubligné/Hudson, he was more for the laughs than anything else. I hope to change that with Bitch Higgins.
 

 
There's one name I left out, and that would be the one time I ever built a goalie: Dominik Stryker. If many of you are seeing this name for the first time, I would not be surprised because he retired almost 30 seasons ago, and never had the individual accolades or Hall of Fame induction that would immortalize him in VHL lore. However, my heart still hurts when I look back and reflect on how Stryker's career would have gone had he not been stuck on Helsinki for the majority of his career.
 
In Season 6, Dominik Stryker was drafted 2nd overall to the Helsinki Titans, where we promptly won a Continental Cup in the following season. After that, the GM at the time, falco (Daric Radmonovic) handed the reigns over to me, and both he and just about everyone else on that team who was good was either traded away, left via free agency, or retired except for Dominik Stryker. Stryker barely saw any playoffs action until I stepped down as GM several seasons later (I want to say Season 12) and Stryker was traded to the New York Americans in what would be his final year. After that, I retired him and went on with Stormwall.
 

 
I guess I've always wondered about how good of a career Stryker could have had if I declined to take the GM position in Helsinki, and if someone more competent at the job had been in charge. If you want an idea of how alone Stryker often was on some of those Helsinki teams, take a look at the all-time stats. At the time of his retirement, nobody had faced more shots than Dominik Stryker's 18,697. Today, I learned that not only does that record still stand today, but that no goalie has even come close to touching it. 2nd all-time behind Stryker is Remy LeBeau at 16,564 - more than 2,000 shots less in about 60 more games than Stryker ever played. Yet still, with so many shots faced, Stryker's save percentage is 7th all-time with a .924, behind no less than three Hall of Fame goalies (Benoit Devereux, CAL G, Tuomas Tukio), and ahead of many others.
 
That said, aside from the Continental Cup run in Season 6 (and a Founder's Cup win with the now defunct Toledo Scorpions in Season 5, earning him the Esposito/Skylar Rift trophy), Stryker never managed to fill up his trophy case. He has 20 career playoffs games to his name, most of which came in that first Continental Cup run, and as good as he was, he was never the best in the league in any given season. Plus, again, he just wasn't on many good teams. His 215 losses rank him 4th all-time, but every goalie ahead of him as a save percentage of .910 or less. His goals against average of 3.24 is 64th all-time, which is terrible yet understandable, and his 188 wins place him 27th. At the end of the day, those stats, while being more team-focused, just aren't very good.
 

 
I don't really know why I wrote this, or why I'm only claiming 2 points for it (really relying on that podcast I guess) but I just feel it was a long time coming. There aren't even that many people left in this league who would remember those days, that are now around 6 years ago, but still, I think this was cathartic to write. I don't expect any HOF nominations to come out of the woodwork, nor do I think Stryker deserves them, but I do think he was - and still is - underrated, and was definitely overshadowed by some terrible teams where he was often the only one showing up to work. Though he's not a real person, I'm hoping old Dominik is reading this in his rocking chair up in Bavaria, Germany and smiling, feeling the silent vindication he's been longing for, but again, he's not a real person so...probably not going to happen.
 
THE END

THE BITCH MAKES HIS MARK

Yeah