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Hobbit 3 : 6,5

 

the CG were great and I guess the story too but I'm not really into that "war gang bang" thing

 

The CG wasn't even good either.

 

The story was uninteresting. Why the fuck did they cut the death of Smaug from the end of the last movie for it to play out in less than 10 minutes at the start of the next one? COME THE FUCK ON. The writing was awful ("Why does it hurt so much? If this is what love is I don't want it" OH MY GOD THIS IS GEORGE LUCAS "I HATE SAND" BAD) and Tauriel ended up being a completely worthless character.

 

And those are only a few of my issues with it.

I'm not really a fan of LOTR/Hobbit so the I didn't even notice the small details. The main problem with the CG was that every scene looked a bit too glossy/shiny. I know they wanted the "fairy" feeling but it wasn't necessary at some point. 

I'm not really a fan of LOTR/Hobbit so the I didn't even notice the small details. The main problem with the CG was that every scene looked a bit too glossy/shiny. I know they wanted the "fairy" feeling but it wasn't necessary at some point. 

 

The problem with the CGI is they were too fucking lazy to find a bunch of extras, pay them $100 each and tell them to stand in the fucking foreground. The fact that they used CGI on characters who were right up next to the "camera" is such bullshit. Especially when you go back and look at how they did so much of the same shit with practical effects in the LOTR Trilogy.

 

I'm also a kid who was raised on The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, so these movies piss me the fuck off.

 

:francis:

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The Grand Budapest Hotel - 7.5/10

 

I was expecting crazy given Wes Anderson and got exactly that. Not sure it's a classic for him as much as The Royal Tenenbaums is but it was still pretty good. The writing was witty, the acting was solid and the visuals were quite well done. Plot was a little convoluted, even by Anderson standards, but it kept me watching.

Lord of the Rings are some of my favorite movies of all time.

 

The Hobbit Part 1 was meh, part 2 was brutal and part 3 I won't bother watching until I have time on a Friday night and can watch it for free from home.  So sad what he did to it, particularly when the LoTR were so amazing.

Gone Girl was the best movie ever. Nough said.

 

I watched it about a week ago. It was quite good, but best movie ever? Fucking kids today and their hyperbole. Seriously, every week something new is the best ever, this is the favorite of all time blah blah. Having a serious discussion about the merits of something with best ever or ratings in today's day an age is like a lost art. Internet culture and meta critic/rotten tomatoes society ruining film discussion tbh. 

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Kingsman - 8/10

Absurd to the point of farcical but it does its job well. A few iffy, cringy, and generally stupid parts (which some might enjoy more), but crucially self-conscious.

If you like the likes of Johnny English and Hot Fuzz, you will enjoy this. I did.

If you enjoy time travel movies that play with your brains then I highly reccomend Time Lapse.  Not a very well known movie, and the acting is kind of weak, but it has a really fun plot. I truly enjoyed watching the film and there were tons of 'Aha!' moments in it.  Check it out!

Wat.

 

It's easily the worst of the three.

 

And the first two weren't that great.

 

O_O

I honestly thought the 2nd was the worst.

 

I'd say 3, 1, 2 in that order. I actually really liked the 3rd Hobbit.

Watched Big Hero 6 last night. I'd give it a 7/10.

 

Coming from a guy who loved Frozen and Tangled, Big Hero didn't exactly deliver for me.

 

 

Also, Interstellar - 9/10.

I honestly thought the 2nd was the worst.

 

I'd say 3, 1, 2 in that order. I actually really liked the 3rd Hobbit.

 

1 and 2 took a ton of liberties with the story, but 3 absolutely butchered it. Overused, mediocre CGI, nonsensical plot, god awful writing ("if this is love, I do not want it. Take it away, please. Why does it hurt so much?" --- "because it was real" --- FUCK THAT SHIT), fucking love triangle, fucking ALFRID, they cut away at the part of the battle that was actually what people were waiting for (Beorn and the Eagles), and suddenly, when we get to the end of the movie... OH NOW LETS FOCUS PURELY ON BILBO AND NOT HAVE ANY CLOSURE FOR ANYONE ELSE. Either make Bilbo the focus the entire way through or you gotta give all the characters some kind of closure.

 

It is the only time I have ever left a theater angry. I've left disappointed, but never angry. Until The Battle of the Five Armies.

1 and 2 took a ton of liberties with the story, but 3 absolutely butchered it. Overused, mediocre CGI, nonsensical plot, god awful writing ("if this is love, I do not want it. Take it away, please. Why does it hurt so much?" --- "because it was real" --- FUCK THAT SHIT), fucking love triangle, fucking ALFRID, they cut away at the part of the battle that was actually what people were waiting for (Beorn and the Eagles), and suddenly, when we get to the end of the movie... OH NOW LETS FOCUS PURELY ON BILBO AND NOT HAVE ANY CLOSURE FOR ANYONE ELSE. Either make Bilbo the focus the entire way through or you gotta give all the characters some kind of closure.

 

It is the only time I have ever left a theater angry. I've left disappointed, but never angry. Until The Battle of the Five Armies.

Movie reviews by Sandro because he cannot make a player.

I watched it about a week ago. It was quite good, but best movie ever? Fucking kids today and their hyperbole. Seriously, every week something new is the best ever, this is the favorite of all time blah blah. Having a serious discussion about the merits of something with best ever or ratings in today's day an age is like a lost art. Internet culture and meta critic/rotten tomatoes society ruining film discussion tbh. 

I'd personally rather listen to that than a bunch of oldhead critics refusing to believe that anything made after the first 20 years of existence for the medium could possibly be in the running for best whatever ever (and I'm not saying you're one of those oldhead critics device, but you get my point). But anyway, to your point of having a serious discussion about the merits of a best ever candidate, most people don't get that in depth with their observations of entertainment. That's not a young person thing, it's a person thing in general. Movies are (to most people) a way to forget about how shitty the world is for two hours, I respect your point of view of looking at them as something much more, but most people just don't do that.

I'm able to do both. Sure, it can be difficult to shut off the analytical side of things to just enjoy a movie, but at this point I have too much knowledge of film to be able to completely dismiss stuff. Even when I go and marathon horror movies in October, I'm aware of the fact that a lot of the movies I'm watching are actually kind of shitty. But I'm able to enjoy them for other reasons, or sit back and purely focus on the actual film making merits of the movie.

I never read any of the Hobbit books. The only book I've actually read of Tolkien's is The Two Towers. No idea why that's the only one.

 

 

The lovey dovey crap was pretty awful but for entertainment value I found the 3rd Hobbit the best.

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