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12th Annual Unofficial VHL Regular Season Awards – S77

Another exciting regular season has come to a close. That means we can dole out some regular season awards! Welcome everyone to the 12th Annual Unofficial VHL Regular Season Awards honoring the highs and lows of S77! Thank you to everyone that reads this.

 

These awards have been created by me. There is no voting process and they are not officially recognized by the VHL Board of Governors. I wrote descriptions for most of these award names in the original award post.

 

I’m reducing the list of the previous winners to the last 5 seasons. If you want to check out the award winners from every season, use this link: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1sAZtX3bxVpPTIsKe1rSRVOenH1-iyWzbQEdR9ZvYOdU/edit?usp=sharing

 

I also added the “all-time” record for each category. Of course by that I mean all-time for the existence of these awards, not all-time, all-time. Clear? Ok, good. Let’s get things underway!

 

 

The Pylon Award (worst +/- rating) – Ove Dyrdahl @GRZ :dcd:

 

Despite Tyler Walker @Advantage and HC Davos’ best efforts (Davos had 7 of the top 10 players in this category), Ove was able to walk away with this award with a -43 on the season. Walker did his best to keep the streak of -35 being the winning total by getting that exact value for a 2nd straight season, but Ove had other plans.

 

All-time record: S73 - Balentine Kidd -  -74

 

Last 5 Pylon Award Winners:

Season

Player

+ / -

S76

Tyler Walker

-35

S75

Pistil Stamen

-35

S74

Jay Jones

-38

S73

Balentine Kidd

-74

S72

Jack Feriancek

-59

 

 

 

The Gandhi Award (least penalty minutes, min 1,000 minutes played) – The Terrible Trivium @der meister :ldn:

 

Last year’s winner, John Brewitt @JBrew42 had 0 PIM this season as well. Unfortunately, they didn’t qualify to win this award because they only had 918 minutes played. Part of me said “oh who cares about the rules for this award”, just give it to them. But the other part of me said “if these awards don’t follow the rules, then all integrity is lost. If integrity is lost, then what do you have? Nothing.” But then another part of me said “Hey DMax, you created these rules out of thin air and you run this whole thing. Do what you want.” But then another part of me said “I think we have too many conversations going on with ourself, let’s all quiet down.” That last part ended the self-conversation. The rule stays in place. Our winner, The Terrible Trivium, recorded 4 PIM in 2,136 minutes played. They won the award on a tie-breaker over Ziarie Anigbogu @ngine4 (4 PIM, 1,399 minutes played) and Paul Webber @WebberP (4 PIM, 1,274 minutes played). Special recognition to Isabella Campbell @Banackock who only recorded 1 penalty this season, it just happened to be a major penalty. That 5 PIM cost them this award.

 

All-time record: S67 - Diljodh Starload - 0 PIM, 2091 Minutes Played

 

Last 5 Gandhi Award Winners:

Season

Player

PIM

Minutes Played

S76

John Brewitt

0

1320

S75

Jonas Stormsson

4

1700

S74

Uhtred

2

2132

S73

Joseph Gainer

2

2106

S72

Jared Spaz

2

1106

 

 

 

The Major2 Award (most major penalties) - Randy Marsh @oilmandan :mal:

 

Randy Marsh winning this award seemed inevitable. Not only did he win, he set the all-time record with 14 major penalties this season. Amazingly enough for each one of those majors, Randy could be heard saying “Oh I’m sorry I thought this was America.” That may have worked while he was on Seattle, but clearly didn’t help him in Malmo, which, in fact, is not America.

 

All-time Record: S77 – Randy Marsh - 14 Majors

 

Previous Major2 Award Winners:

Season

Player

Major Penalties

S76

Riley Knight Gee

9

S75

Gary Tarantino

12

S74

Gary Tarantino

10

S73

Mickey Dickson

7

S72

Mikko Lahtinen

9

 

 

 

 

The Timex Award (received most hits) – Taro Tsujimoto @GustavMattias :dav:

 

Some question if Taro is even a real person, or if they were just made up as a joke. Taro winning this award should assure everyone that he is not only real, he gets hit a lot. Taro led the league in hits received with 307.

 

All-time Record: S69 - John Madden - 357 Hits taken

 

Last 5 Timex Award Winners:

Season

Player

Hits Taken

S76

Thomas Landry II

329

S75

John Merrick

311

S74

Mikko Lahtinen

321

S73

Hunter Hearst Helmsley

310

S72

Anthony Matthews

274

 

 

 

The John Wayne Award (most shots on goal) - Lexi Glass @AW13 :war:

 

Lexi came in and took this award to a whole new level. Their 570 shots on goal not only cleared the next closest player, teammate Aloe Dear @Renomitsu , by 49 shots, but they smashed the previous all-time record of 533 shots as well.

 

All-time record: S77 - Lexi Glass - 570 Shots on goal

 

Last 5 John Wayne Award Winners:

Season

Player

Shots on Goal

S76

Andrew Su

483

S75

Mikko Lahtinen

510

S74

Patrik Tallinder

532

S73

Sigard Gunnar

531

S72

Jet Jaguar

425

 

 

 

The “Hit the Broadside of the Barn” Award (most own shots blocked) - Patrik Laine @PatrikLaine :hel:

 

If you would have told me at the beginning of the season that someone would smash the all-time shot record like Lexi did, I would have bet a lot of money they would sweep all the shot categories then. I’m glad that conversation did happen, because Patrik Laine put a cold stop to any change Lexi had of sweeping the shot categories. They won the award with 150 of their own shots blocked. For those wondering, Lexi finished 6th in this category with 141 OSB.

 

All-time record:  S76 - Chris Hylands - 165 Own shots blocked

 

Last 5 HtBotB Award Winners:

Season

Player

Own Shots Blocked

S76

Chris Hylands

165

S75

Mikko Lahtinen

146

S74

Ray Sheilds

157

S73

Brock Louth

164

S72

Henrik Zoiderberg

122

 

 

 

The “Can’t Hit the Broadside of the Barn” Award (most own shots missed) – Lexi Glass @AW13 :war:

 

Glass owed this category even more than the shots on goal one. They missed 424 shots this season. Next closest player was again teammate Aloe Dear with 59 less missed shots.

 

All-time record: S74 - Brock Louth - 429 Shots missed

 

Last 5 CHtBotB Award Winners:

Season

Player

Shots Missed

S76

Andrew Su

373

S75

Mikko Lahtinen

375

S74

Brock Louth

429

S73

Brock Louth

425

S72

RJ Jubis

299

 

 

 

The New Shin Pads Award (most blocked shots) – Viktor Alexei Kamenov @BigTittySmitty :mal:

 

If these awards are telling us anything, it’s that this was a fantastic season. Another all-time record falls in dramatic fashion! Kamenov’s 223 shots blocked soundly beat the previous all-time record of 207.

 

All-time record: S77 - Viktor Alexei Kamenov - 223 Shots blocked

 

Last 5 New Shin Pads Award Winners:

Season

Player

Shots Blocked

S76

Hulk Hogan Jr

188

S75

Fernando Jokinen

200

S74

Matty Socks

181

S73

Alex Bridges

194

S72

Condor Adrienne

188

 

 

The Tired Legs Award (most minutes played) - Andrew Su @Da_Berr :que:

 

It’s surprising this hall-of-famer hasn’t already won this award. Su adds to their collection of hardware by topping the league with 2,248 minutes played.

 

All-time record: S73 - Alex Bridges - 2401 Minutes played

 

Last 5 Tired Legs Award Winners:

Season

Player

Minutes Played

S76

Chicken Wing

2213

S75

Alek Andreshnikov

2303

S74

Guy Lesieur

2279

S73

Alex Bridges

2401

S72

Condor Adrienne and Zyrok12

2227

 

 

 

The Snap! Award (most power play minutes) - Onde Sandstrom @fonziGG :que:

 

Sandstrom spent 422 minutes on the powerplay, besting 2nd place finisher and teammate Andrew Su by 29 minutes.

 

All-time record: S67 - Beau Louth - 437 power play minutes

 

Last 5 Snap! Award Winners:

Season

Player

PP Minutes

S76

Alex Letang

351

S75

Micah Adrienne

414

S74

Micheal Gary Scott

378

S73

Hulk Hogan

356

S72

Micheal Gary Scott

340

 

 

 

The 1 vs. 100 Award (most time on penalty kill) - Viktor Alexei Kamenov @BigTittySmitty :mal:

 

Now it’s a little more clear how Kamenov smashed the all-time blocked shots record, they spent an all-time high 418 minutes killing penalties. The runner up this season had 67 less minutes killing penalties.

 

All-time record: S77 - Viktor Alexei Kamenov - 418 penalty kill minutes

               

Last 5 1 vs. 100 Award Winners:

Season

Player

PK Minutes

S76

Mikeal Keef

359

S75

Dakota Lamb

369

S74

Edwin THE Encarnacion

344

S73

Tyler Walker

390

S72

Cody Smith

356

 

 

 

The Sean Archer Award (highest face-off win %, min 1,000 faceoffs) - Christian Mingle @Quik :chi:

 

Rumor has it that Mingle learned how to take faceoffs by making sure there was at least a bible worth of space between him and the other player. It looks like it worked. Mingle led the league winning 58.42% of the 3,309 faceoffs they took. A down year for this award as that is the lowest percentage to ever win the award.

 

All-time record: S74 - Brock Louth - 63.72% face-offs won

               

Last 5 Sean Archer Award Winners:

Season

Player

Face Off Pct

S76

Benny Graves

59.91%

S75

Benny Graves

60.14%

S74

Brock Louth

63.72%

S73

Brock Louth

62.14%

S72

Hunter Hearst Helmsley

62.35%

 

 

 

The Castor Troy Award (lowest face-off win %, min 1,000 faceoffs) - Pietro Angellini @okifenoki :mos:

 

Look, this isn’t a good award to win. But at least Angellini won with award with the highest face-off win % of all-time. The won a not terrible, but still worst in the league, 44.71% of their face-offs.

 

All-time record: S66 - Bryce Zhields - 30% face-offs won.

               

Last 5 Castor Troy Award Winners:

Season

Player

Face Off Pct

S76

Nero Endrizzi

43.87%

S75

Jeff Odinson

32.74%

S74

Kefka Palazzo

32.26%

S73

Thorny Underyew

35.48%

S72

Richard Penisson

38.13%

 

 

 

The Triple Deke Award (most penalty shot goals) - Arthur Dayne @Infernal :mal:

 

Dayne tied Christian Mingle with 5 penalty shot goals but Dayne gets the award because they only took 6 penalty shots compared to Mingle’s 8.

 

All-time record: S67 - Veran Dragomir - 8 penalty shot goals

               

Last 5 Triple Deke Award Winners:

Season

Player

Penalty Shot Goals

S76

Kris Rice

5

S75

Ola Vikingstad

6

S74

Benny Graves

7

S73

Codrick Past

5

S72

Sigard Gunnar

6

 

 

 

The Rocky Award (most fights won) – Riley Knight Gee @KnightRiley :prg:

 

What a difference a year makes. Gee won the Glass Joe award last season. They got up off the ground, dusted themselves off, and came out swinging this season. Gee had a great fight record of 6-1-3. The 6 fight wins gets them this award and their name on the all-time list.

 

All-time record: S77 - Riley Knight Gee, S74 - Kristopher McDagg, and S67 ACL TEAR - 6 fights won

               

Last 5 Rocky Award Winners:

Season

Player

Fights Won

S76

Cabe McJake and Randy Marsh

3

S75

Vin Calia

4

S74

Kristopher McDagg

6

S73

Kristopher McDagg

4

S72

Kristopher McDagg

2

 

 

 

The Glass Joe Award (most fights lost) – Randy Marsh @oilmandan :mal:

 

Marsh likes to fight. We know this already. Apparently he doesn’t like to win those fights all that much. His fight record was 1-4-9 this season. The 4 fight loses wins him the glass joe award.

 

All-time record: S74 - Lee Xin and S69 Rusty Shackleford - 5 fights lost

               

Last 5 Glass Joe Award Winners:

Season

Player

Fights Lost

S76

Riley Knight Gee

4

S75

Jared Willis

3

S74

Lee Xin

5

S73

Mickey Dickson

3

S72

Roll Fizzlebeef

3

 

 

 

The Stars Award (most stars won) – Jim Bob @jRuutu :sea:

 

Jim Bob done won this here award with 26 total stars this season.

 

Honorable mention to Groovy Dood @bigAL who led the league with 14 first stars but fell 1 short of this award with 25 total stars.

 

All-time record: S76 - Mikko Lahtinen – 34 total stars

               

Last 5 Stars Award Winners:

Season

Player

Total Stars

S76

Mikko Lahtinen

34

S75

Mikko Lahtinen

24

S74

Mikko Lahtinen

32

S73

Sigard Gunnar

30

S72

Julius Freeman

25

 

 

 

The “Always a Bridesmaid” Award (most stars without winning 1st star) – Mikeal Keef @RStar :la:

 

Keef is the bouquet holder, winning this award with 9 stars, but no 1st stars. It’s ok, there’s a lot of stars in the sky. Your time will come. You have a great personality.

 

All-time record: S72 - Lewis Dawson and S67 Dan Baillie - 13 stars

               

Last 5 Bridesmaid Award Winners:

Season

Player

Stars

S76

Dan Baillie Jr

12

S75

Jacob Perry

7

S74

Richard Penisson

12

S73

Spencer Elsby

8

S72

Lewis Dawson

13

 

 

The Biggest Backpack Award (player with the largest difference in points from the rest of their team) - Groovy Dood @bigAL :dcd:

 

Dood had a great year for D.C. with 106 points. The next closest teammate was Alex Letang @Spartan with 80 points. That 26 point difference was the largest in the league.

 

All-time record: S76 – Chris Hylands - 36 points more than next teammate

           

Last 5 Backpack Award Winners:

Season

Player

Point Difference from nearest teammate

S76

Chris Hylands

36

S75

Dagmar Havlova

22

S74

Patrik Tallinder

27

S73

Hunter Hearst Helmsley

27

S72

Benny Graves

13

 

 

 

The Anniversary Award (rank in total points matches season number) - Vin Calia @VinCal :la:

 

Vin wins with being 77th overall in points. Since this is the 77th season, you get the award. 62 points is a great total for this award. Congratulations!

 

Last 5 Anniversary Award Winners:

Season

Player

Points

S76

Jonas Stormsson

59

S75

Seabass Perrin

62

S74

Pengu

64

S73

Charlie Paddywagon

63

S72

Ondrej Ohradka

51

 

 

 

 

The Egghshell Award (goalie with most overtime losses) - Thadius Sales @thadthrasher :nya:

 

There were 3 goalies tied with 7 OTL. For the tie-breaker I went with the goalie who played the least number of games out of the 3, meaning their Overtime losses were a larger % of their total games. Sales wins it with 7 OTL in 59 games played.

 

All-time record: S75 - Doug Dimmadome and S71 Jaxx Hextall - 11 OT games lost

 

Previous Eggshell Award Winners:

Season

Player

Overtime Games Lost

S76

Doug Dimmadome

9

S75

Doug Dimmadome

11

S74

Greg Eagles

10

S73

Raymond Bernard

9

S72

Michael Johnson

9

 

 

 

The Jason Voorhees Award (most PIM by a Goalie) - Rara Rasputin @Victor :sea:

 

There was another tie for this award and I used the same criteria as above. Rasputin had 10 PIM in 68 games played compared to Stone Wolski @DollarAndADream 10 PIM in 70 games played.

 

All-time record: S76 - Doug Dimmadome - 29 PIM

 

Previous Jason Voorhees Award Winners:

Season

Player

PIM

S76

Doug Dimmadome

29

S75

Jaxx Hextall

12

S74

Ajay Krishna

21

S73

Rayz Funk

27

S72

A Red Guy

12

 

 

 

The Poke Check Award (highest % of penalty shots stopped, min 10 penalty shots against) - Jacob Carson @jacobcarson877 :war:

 

Carson stayed up late at night to work on their penalty shot game. They stopped a league high 80% of the penalty shots they faced.

 

All-time record: S75 - Grekkark Gyrfalcon – 88.9% penalty shots stopped.

 

Previous Poke Check Award Winners:

Season

Player

Penalty Shots Stopped

S76

Grekkark Gyrfalcon

79.5%

S75

Grekkark Gyrfalcon

88.9%

S74

Jacques Lafontaine

85.7%

S73

Stone Wolski

87.0%

S72

Virgil Ligriv

83.3%

 

 

 

That wraps it up for this season! Another year, another successful award ceremony! Congratulations and/or condolences to all the winners! As always, please provide any suggestions, insights, or thoughts in the comments. Thank you all for reading and continuing to make this a successful column!

 

Over 2,000 words. Will claim for 4 weeks.

Randy Marsh GIF by memecandy
My reaction to setting the record for fights 

sad randy marsh GIF by South Park
My reaction to seeing Randy lost the most fights too

south park animation GIF
My reaction remembering Randy Marsh is the greatest player in VHL history 

28 minutes ago, Victor said:

I learned from the best in @jRuutu

LMAO.. loved seeing this article... @jRuutu @oilmandan and even our goalie racking up the penalties.. 

1 hour ago, DMaximus said:

The Pylon Award (worst +/- rating) – Ove Dyrdahl @GRZ :dcd:

 

1 hour ago, DMaximus said:

The Biggest Backpack Award (player with the largest difference in points from the rest of their team) - Groovy Dood @bigAL :dcd:

I feel like these awards are very related. Go DC?

  • Commissioner
1 hour ago, DMaximus said:

The Stars Award (most stars won) – Jim Bob

My reign has ended :(

Nice work. This obviously takes a lot of research and work to get this done every year and I enjoy reading this segment every year. It shines light on stats that people don't necessarily notice. I've always liked how you've included previous winners and the all time record in your notes. Keep up the good work 

 

10/10

 

Congratulations @BigTittySmitty on breaking my shot blocking record from S68 I was actually surprised 207 was a league record and I'm not at all surprised to see it broken this soon.  I hope to see it broken again! Looking back it's the only career accomplishment I had with Seabass.

10 hours ago, Victor said:

I learned from the best in @jRuutu

I'm here to help!

 

10 hours ago, Banackock said:

LMAO.. loved seeing this article... @jRuutu @oilmandan and even our goalie racking up the penalties.. 

We are Bears after all 😉:sea:

Thank you @DMaximusand everyone else, you are all so wonderful.. Now if this does not translate into defencemen of the year especially for defence.. I don't know what will.

 

 

We get medical care here right... My back, and body are sore from carrying said team. @Banackock

 

 

  • 2 weeks later...

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